Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
27 Years, 158 Days and 77037 Haiku later...

shut your fucking face
ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
i'm getting lazy
Haiku # 51233, September 9, 2014 10:53 pm ET
by sean
Ass full of pork fat
jiggles like a jello mold
mouth is flapping to
Haiku # 51232, September 9, 2014 10:45 pm ET
by sean
you are nasty whore
eat shit and die nasty skank
Emily whore breath
Haiku # 51231, September 9, 2014 10:40 pm ET
by sean
I need to go poop.
But I'm writing these haiku.
Too late, shat myself.
Haiku # 51230, September 9, 2014 10:33 pm ET
by sean
My penis is GOD!
Yes, it is wholly holy.
And it has a hole.

Out of which comes cum.
It is not some, but a bunch.
And it is your lunch.
Haiku # 51229, September 9, 2014 2:31 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Humans are evil.
Share an ebola cola.
In New York City.
Haiku # 51221, September 8, 2014 5:58 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Nothing more to say.
Nothing more to do with you.
Time for you to leave.
Haiku # 51220, September 8, 2014 1:16 am ET
by Blake
Hell show in slow mo
Fighting and alarms return
Just want to get home
Haiku # 51219, September 7, 2014 5:00 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
It is all over
So drunk I can't make poems
Instead I use air
Haiku # 51218, September 7, 2014 4:38 am ET
by Mandingo
Corn running too late
Fall will freeze it on the stalk
Global Warming please
Haiku # 51217, September 7, 2014 3:28 am ET
by Mandingo
Obsequious sniff
Play bow, then scratchy rolling
Woof! I run away
Haiku # 51216, September 7, 2014 3:21 am ET
by Mandingo
Honking in anger
Angry geese attack the crows
A goose gang turf war
Haiku # 51210, September 6, 2014 1:38 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Turpentine sunshine
Bird words drop from me like turds
Splattering unheard
Haiku # 51206, September 5, 2014 12:10 am ET
by Dog scooting across your new carpet on it's behind
Now is sleepy time
Ready to relax and rest
Don't need to count sheep
Haiku # 51203, September 4, 2014 12:43 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Phychiatric crap
What
Haiku # 51202, September 3, 2014 4:27 pm ET
by You are sick
High school humping date.
Teasing in a coffeehouse.
Back room giggle grope.

I am the witness,
try to mind my own business,
keeping my back turned.

They leave when I fart.
Now I can get back to work.
Black beans are awesome.
Haiku # 51194, September 2, 2014 6:02 pm ET
by Bad Poetry
Titilatified.
Mammary spammary bounce.
Bonerifically.
Haiku # 51193, September 2, 2014 1:14 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Hello there Janis.
Here's a haiku to remove.
See it down below:

Haiku #51137 (boner pill spam)

And remove this one.
That's if you want to, I guess.
Or keep it -- Who cares?
Haiku # 51192, September 2, 2014 1:09 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
The SPAM is removed!
Praise to our Lord and Savior!
Yes, I mean Janis.
Haiku # 51191, September 2, 2014 1:02 pm ET
by Darth Figpucker of Liberian Ebola Camp Sewage Technician
Oh, quiet thee down
Pagan sniffer of goat nut
Prepare for tough times
Haiku # 51189, September 2, 2014 12:46 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Gun shots and fireworks
Agony and extacy
Laurel and Hardy
Haiku # 51188, September 1, 2014 10:27 pm ET
by Tree buggerer
Green round snot bubbles.
Blown from your sick nephew's nose.
It pops in your eye.
Haiku # 51182, August 31, 2014 4:19 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
The new messiah.
Ebola will save us all.
And cleanse Mother Earth.
Haiku # 51181, August 31, 2014 4:17 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Pickled newborn pups.
Tasty little chihuahuas.
Poodles are good too.
Haiku # 51180, August 31, 2014 4:13 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Grateful Dead acid.
I remember it fondly.
Jerry's face blotter.

Your dog seems happy.
Now your turn, conservative
old grumpy fart man.
Haiku # 51179, August 30, 2014 8:32 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
I need to go poop.
But I'm writing these haiku.
Too late, shat myself.
Haiku # 51178, August 30, 2014 8:21 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
What a dick I am!
I just cannot stop myself.
I'll go beat off now.
Haiku # 51177, August 30, 2014 8:19 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
I will take over.
No other poems remain.
Except for my own.
Haiku # 51176, August 30, 2014 8:17 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Never recycle.
It wastes too much energy.
There's no benefit.
Haiku # 51175, August 30, 2014 8:16 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
My love has dried up.
Along with my tiny balls.
I won't take those pills!
Haiku # 51174, August 30, 2014 8:11 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Most awful flavors
can only be concocted
by mother-in-law.
Haiku # 51173, August 30, 2014 8:09 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Oh, mushy dog poo,
let me squish you in my shoes,
treading new carpets.
Haiku # 51172, August 30, 2014 8:06 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Hey, pay attention
Heavy partition mud eat
Please dance to the beat
Haiku # 51171, August 30, 2014 5:00 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
This Haiku website
Walls of a New York subway
Almost the same thing

Except for one thing...
Most of what goes up here stays
Subway's washed away
Haiku # 51165, August 29, 2014 11:10 pm ET
by Floss Regularly
Damn, you dosed my dog!
He just sits there listening
To the Grateful Dead
Haiku # 51162, August 28, 2014 8:30 pm ET
by Concerned Citizen
Your dog is tripping.
I put acid in his bowl.
Watch out for my poop.
Haiku # 51159, August 27, 2014 11:52 pm ET
by LSD Will Set You Free!
You fitlthy hippy
Quit going poop in my yard
Hope my dog bites you
Haiku # 51158, August 27, 2014 11:01 pm ET
by Concerned Citizen
Can't they sell good drugs?
Like acid and ecstasy.
I'd buy those online!
Haiku # 51156, August 27, 2014 2:45 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
You think I'm Merlin?!
"Poof! You're a Delorian!"
Go back and stay there.
Haiku # 51155, August 27, 2014 2:40 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Send me back in time
I'd change a few decisions
And fix my haiku
Haiku # 51154, August 26, 2014 11:47 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Prolific spammers
Posting more than the poets
Not the way it should be
Haiku # 51153, August 26, 2014 11:44 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
in a century
a bookmark in history
hawking boner pills
Haiku # 51151, August 26, 2014 8:08 am ET
by ash
I love you Cheetos!
I surrender completely
Crunchy cheesiness
Haiku # 51145, August 24, 2014 11:41 pm ET
by Chester Cheetah of Plano, Texas
Grotesque green goblins
Inhabit my proboscis.
Shall I give you one?
Haiku # 51144, August 24, 2014 2:25 pm ET
by Stimpy's Nose Goblins
hello! boner pills
is it me you're looking for ?
that's a bit richie
Haiku # 51142, August 21, 2014 8:55 am ET
by ash
I shot a rainbow.
Sticky rainbow on her face
and wedding gown.

Haiku # 51140, August 20, 2014 1:38 pm ET
by Darth Figpucker
Fighting those spammers
Like spitting into the wind
What a stupid waste
Haiku # 51138, August 19, 2014 7:24 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
T-Rex McNuggets
Old McDonald had a farm.
E-I-E-I-O.
Haiku # 51132, August 17, 2014 1:35 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Magnify centaur
Grade A flank steaks and nice thighs
Superfluous head
Haiku # 51131, August 16, 2014 5:25 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Magnificent fart.
Grande flatulence surprise.
Sulfurous fumes waft.
Haiku # 51128, August 14, 2014 6:55 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
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