Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
27 Years, 136 Days and 76969 Haiku later...

Let's go spread disease.
No other way to save earth.
Extinction event.
Haiku # 52058, February 19, 2015 1:59 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
I like hamburgers
even if they don't have ham
They should stop lying
Haiku # 52052, February 18, 2015 12:20 am ET
by False advertising
Isn't it funny
that Valentines Day has the
initials VD.
Haiku # 52039, February 14, 2015 1:46 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Disable symbols.
Especially these two here.
The spam will then die.

< and >
Haiku # 52038, February 14, 2015 1:43 pm ET
by Darth Figpucker of North Korea hacking the CIA database. ;-)
Do you need money?
Education is pointless.
Just go rob a bank.
Haiku # 52035, February 13, 2015 11:43 am ET
by Phoenix University! of Arizona - the state of bad online education.
Disable the code.
I mean the HTML.
The spammers will go.
Haiku # 52025, February 11, 2015 12:48 pm ET
by Darth Figpucker of The basement of Satan's outhouse.
Big data is fucked
The machines taking over
Don tin-foil hat
Haiku # 52023, February 10, 2015 11:26 am ET
by Janis
I refuse to quit
Maybe I am a dumb shit
I say, "so be it."
Haiku # 52020, February 9, 2015 4:22 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Back in the old days
The internet seemed so safe
Large listening device
Haiku # 52019, February 9, 2015 2:26 pm ET
by Janis
blue ties
smiling at me
nothing but blue ties
do I see

you turds
parroting on
nothing but three words
that's too long

never saw the house looking so sad
never saw things going so bad
promises made, hurrying by
when you're in power, my how you lie

blue days
time you were gone
nothing but turnbull
from now on
Haiku # 52018, February 7, 2015 9:56 pm ET
by ash of australia, waiting for the leadership spill
I need to go shit.
I will force it if I must.
Watch my veins bulge out.
Haiku # 52005, February 5, 2015 1:53 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
I want to own gold.
Platinum is okay too.
But gold is pretty.
Haiku # 52004, February 5, 2015 1:51 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Vaginas are bad.
They're even downright evil.
'Cause they make people.
Haiku # 52003, February 5, 2015 1:49 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Poo-poo is taboo.
Who do you know in the zoo?
The blue kangaroo.
Haiku # 52002, February 5, 2015 1:44 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Dingleberry pie.
Rhinoceroses are great.
Do you like my hat?
Haiku # 52001, February 5, 2015 1:42 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Haikus are awesome
But sometimes they don't make sense
Refrigerator
Haiku # 51999, February 4, 2015 8:25 pm ET
by nobody of nowhere
Jake, you silly fool.
Enjambment is a no-no.
Use three sentences.
Haiku # 51998, February 4, 2015 6:07 pm ET
by Darth Figpucker of Lloyd's of London of Newark, NJ
This is a guide to
how many syllables you
need in a Haiku.
Haiku # 51997, February 4, 2015 3:06 pm ET
by jake of state farm
Tor, you need a whore.
Cash is real; VD is real.
And there is no love.
Haiku # 51995, February 4, 2015 9:30 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
I just listened to
Careful with That Axe Eugene.
Brings back memories.
Haiku # 51994, February 4, 2015 1:28 am ET
by Darth Figpucker
Love is a mirage
We share smiles but what's the point?
I need something real.
Haiku # 51993, February 4, 2015 12:23 am ET
by Tor of Toronto
Is it the last storm
Spirals out of order, plows
Make snow ziggurats
Haiku # 51992, February 2, 2015 8:18 pm ET
by ronin
Football game today
How could some become obsessed
with sweaty mean men
Haiku # 51990, February 1, 2015 4:54 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Magic hamster talks
about philosophy and
the beauty of life
Haiku # 51989, February 1, 2015 4:51 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
You know you are grown
Old when pay phones are for sale
In antique locales
Haiku # 51988, January 30, 2015 8:12 pm ET
by ronin
It sucks getting old.
Watching porn does not arouse.
Should I click the spam?
Haiku # 51987, January 30, 2015 10:40 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
The spam viking sketch
Seems quite appropro to the
Ongoing pill bots
Haiku # 51985, January 30, 2015 1:18 am ET
by ronin
Flying saucer goat
Travels amongst the planets
Bringing joy to all
Haiku # 51984, January 30, 2015 1:15 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
My wife just farted.
I breathed it in quite deeply.
I wish I hadn't.
Haiku # 51973, January 28, 2015 5:34 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Let's talk about sex
Just kidding, let's please not
I'm still a virgin
Haiku # 51972, January 28, 2015 2:51 pm ET
by Virgin of Virginia
What is to stop me
From making a long ass post
On this stupid site?
Haiku # 51966, January 27, 2015 3:48 pm ET
by Alex Jones of AMERICA
Feelings are mixed say
I hate amazon but I
Get stuff cheaper there

Or wal mart with cheap
Everything who can keep
That bunch down? Amazon
Haiku # 51965, January 27, 2015 11:35 am ET
by ronin
The danger is not
Being tough enough in mind
To say fuck you to

The right people
Haiku # 51964, January 27, 2015 11:26 am ET
by ronin
Folks seem to indulge
Excess tolerate it then
Puritans take charge
Haiku # 51963, January 27, 2015 11:21 am ET
by ronin
A child's wisdom.
I don't know what nothing is.
And I never will.
Haiku # 51962, January 27, 2015 10:39 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
If you are a whore,
Limit the number of Johns.
Or you will be numb.
Haiku # 51958, January 27, 2015 1:50 am ET
by Darth Figpucker
Think guns and roses
For sale on vinyl 2015
Hows times really change
Haiku # 51957, January 26, 2015 10:27 pm ET
by ronin
After fifteen years
I think I'd move on and let words
Remain on the webpage
Haiku # 51956, January 26, 2015 10:23 pm ET
by ronin
What if poetry
Is bisexual then does
It fail with both sexes?
Haiku # 51955, January 26, 2015 10:17 pm ET
by ronin
I felt real life true
Solid depression here when
I wrote taking it

Personally, feeling
Leave the field to the ghetto rats
Let them burn their own
Haiku # 51954, January 26, 2015 10:15 pm ET
by ronin
I don't like how folks
Live in bubbles talking to
Themselves like budgies

Attack their own reflection
Haiku # 51953, January 26, 2015 10:12 pm ET
by ronin
The stuff written
In the haiku to outdo
Bondagecpony girls
Haiku # 51952, January 26, 2015 10:10 pm ET
by ronin
Honestly it used
to be way worse on here
Gramma has a cock
Haiku # 51951, January 26, 2015 5:59 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Some Haikus are good
But they end in a strange way
Refrigerator
Haiku # 51949, January 26, 2015 4:02 pm ET
by Dukes of Hazard
Hunger drove your mind,
Where once were two, there is one.
Cannibalism.
Haiku # 51947, January 26, 2015 12:46 pm ET
by Nathaniel Owen of Japetus, Moon of Saturn
A voice advises;
The dragon in the kitchen,
says "stop smoking pot."
Haiku # 51946, January 26, 2015 12:42 pm ET
by Nathaniel Owen of Japetus, Moon of Saturn
Unwise fantasy.
I want to go rob a bank.
In my underwear.
Haiku # 51945, January 26, 2015 9:42 am ET
by Darth Figpucker
You have the power.
Slowing time is possible.
Do more silly shit.
Haiku # 51944, January 26, 2015 9:35 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
doing silly shit
i should realise i'm old
my broken rib hurts
Haiku # 51943, January 24, 2015 7:23 am ET
by ash
Poop drum fills with sun
Something here pays like light beer
Underwater fear
Haiku # 51942, January 24, 2015 4:35 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
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