Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
27 Years, 136 Days and 76969 Haiku later...

roasted polar bear
with a side of spotted owl
My favorite meal!
Haiku # 52755, July 17, 2015 6:15 pm ET
by Mandingo Ebola
International
pig-fucking competition
concession stand snacks.

Chitlins are nasty
but so are the contestants.
Can I get mayo?
Haiku # 52754, July 17, 2015 4:38 pm ET
by df of over your head
Were you expecting
that polar bears would survive
man-made extinction?!
Haiku # 52753, July 17, 2015 12:38 pm ET
by df
Polar bears vanish.
Forest fires. Record heat waves
Dead bees on my porch.
Haiku # 52752, July 17, 2015 12:39 am ET
by Tired of it all
What's more disturbing
than pregnant retarded girls?
I am at a loss.
Haiku # 52751, July 16, 2015 4:14 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Here's the solution.
We must kill all the people.
We'll have lots of food.

Start with Africa.
Then, of course, we'll hit China.
And then India.

The problem is solved.
Now go write a bad haiku
about politics.
Haiku # 52750, July 16, 2015 4:10 pm ET
by df
You had enough words
to write a proper haiku
yet failed to make it
Haiku # 52749, July 16, 2015 12:45 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
We have enough food
to feed all of the people
and yet some starve
Haiku # 52748, July 15, 2015 10:05 pm ET
by Tired of it all
But I love mornings.
I also wish you were drunk.
Then I could fuck you.
Haiku # 52747, July 15, 2015 7:08 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
I hate mornings.
I wish I was drunk.
Fuck.
Haiku # 52746, July 15, 2015 2:12 pm ET
by Sherman of mexico
She is like hot pants
freshly out of the dryer
on winter morning
Haiku # 52745, July 15, 2015 12:26 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Success, more or less,
is difficult to express
making me depressed
Haiku # 52744, July 14, 2015 12:50 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Shit-covered dildo.
Maggots in your underwear.
Arby's sandwiches.
Haiku # 52743, July 13, 2015 3:12 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
I like ping-pong games.
I once saw one in Thailand.
That girl could work it!

She wasn't impressed
When I had shot the ball back.
Jealous lady-boys.
Haiku # 52742, July 13, 2015 2:05 pm ET
by Darth Figpucker
I say one haiku
I hope to hear one response
Haiku ping pong game
Haiku # 52741, July 13, 2015 11:43 am ET
by ronin
I write badder but
The era of literacy
Is all about code
Haiku # 52740, July 13, 2015 11:29 am ET
by ronin
Jarred starts and ends
his sandwich-eating career
getting in small pants.
Haiku # 52739, July 13, 2015 10:39 am ET
by Darth Figpucker
Men who eat pussy
Are known as pussy-eaters.
Or just lesbians.
Haiku # 52738, July 13, 2015 10:35 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
So if she know the
Websites grow old regulars stale
Like a pub crawls down
Haiku # 52737, July 13, 2015 1:56 am ET
by ronin
The Harmonica:
A musical instrument.
Window to the soul.
Haiku # 52736, July 12, 2015 11:30 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
put it in my butt
butt put it in my butt butt
putt it in right now
Haiku # 52735, July 11, 2015 1:12 pm ET
by missecho
I have what it takes
to become a poop eater
Yes, I have my dreams!
Haiku # 52734, July 11, 2015 3:17 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
I really liked this part of the article. with a nice and interesting topics have helped a lot of people who do not challenge things people should know.. you need more publicize this so many people who know about it are rare for people to know this... success for you..... .!
Haiku # 52733, July 10, 2015 10:21 pm ET
by moha of aceh
Exploding butt zits.
That was my Fourth of July.
And snorting bath salts
Haiku # 52732, July 10, 2015 8:52 pm ET
by DF
Butt chugging mouth wash.
Minty freshness flatulence.
Scope or Listerine?
Haiku # 52731, July 9, 2015 10:29 pm ET
by Darth Figpucker of evi1 - a novel about you
zombies shambling in
exhausting his last salvo
soon he will join them
Haiku # 52730, July 9, 2015 10:33 am ET
by vince
Jerk it in the sink.
Take a shit in the shower.
College life is good.
Haiku # 52729, July 9, 2015 9:25 am ET
by Frank
Freedom is a myth
People needed to create
To justify laws
Haiku # 52728, July 9, 2015 12:36 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Ash, you are correct.
If you want to have freedom,
You're in the wrong place.

French revolution.
Kill the fat, rich, greedy pigs.
Roast them and eat them.

I will enjoy it.
But I'll do it from afar.
French Polynesia.

I'll be snorkeling
while you battle with fat pigs.
Tanned and slightly drunk.
Haiku # 52727, July 8, 2015 3:45 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Gingers have no souls.
Coppercab even more so.
God doe not love him.
Haiku # 52726, July 7, 2015 12:25 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
with crap leadership
our once mediocre land
sinks even further

quick, look over there !
ignore the economy
and trash the planet

it's pretty woeful
but equally appalling
is the other side
Haiku # 52725, July 7, 2015 9:16 am ET
by ash
Passing judgement does
Not improve writers styles which
Is why writers groups

Bicker...
Moloko
Haiku # 52724, July 7, 2015 1:05 am ET
by ronin
Trust me listening
To some of this stuff is quite
Painful, masochists...

United
Haiku # 52723, July 7, 2015 1:01 am ET
by ronin
Well, if you do not
Believe, then recourse is to
Troll and sarcasm...

Still, you're going to hell
Haiku # 52722, July 7, 2015 12:55 am ET
by ronin
Ah but suffering
Gets some people off!not
Sure, bdsm?

Or, catholic?
Haiku # 52721, July 7, 2015 12:52 am ET
by ronin
You should not be here.
Don't do anything stupid.
Like post a poem.
Haiku # 52720, July 6, 2015 1:16 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Fundamental flaw.
Suffering does not clean sin.
God, man, or devil.
Haiku # 52719, July 6, 2015 1:11 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Just when I come in
Her mouth later I recall
Why I've not fathered.
Haiku # 52718, July 6, 2015 10:30 am ET
by DF
Just when I come on
Here months later I recall
Why I've not posted
Haiku # 52717, July 6, 2015 2:35 am ET
by ronin
Gratification
Mastification Station
God Loves Creation
Haiku # 52716, July 5, 2015 5:18 am ET
by ?
Answer somebody
when they ask you some questions
you get endless spam
Haiku # 52715, July 5, 2015 4:34 am ET
by Lesson learned
One two three four fuck
Sorry but you're out of luck
Sleep alone young buck
Haiku # 52714, July 5, 2015 2:37 am ET
by Tropical hot dog night
Happy day after
Fight off your bad hangover
Try to get some sun
Haiku # 52713, July 5, 2015 1:25 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
I just want to say
Happy Independance Day
Yippie tie yi yay
Haiku # 52712, July 4, 2015 12:26 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Inappropriate
homosexuality
Snuffleupagus.
Haiku # 52711, July 3, 2015 7:13 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Yahoo searches me
It is a wild world out there
We prepare ourselves
Haiku # 52710, July 3, 2015 6:24 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Surrendering sucks
Fast friends forget five dust ducks
Know I let you down
Haiku # 52709, July 3, 2015 5:44 am ET
by Schmarkter
Do not trust language
It will violate your soul
Just tricks of the trade
Haiku # 52708, July 3, 2015 2:07 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
I remember you
Shatting your soiled underpants
Stowed them in mailbox
Haiku # 52707, July 2, 2015 11:41 pm ET
by ?
You can pick your nose.
You can also pick your friends.
But you can't wipe your friends on the back of the couch.

It's funny you mention mailing boogers. When I get junk mail with a return envelope -- postage paid -- that's exactly what I do. Sometimes I also mail them perverted poetry if I have time.

Good luck to you sir.
Nice to know I'm not alone.
Great minds think alike.
Haiku # 52706, July 2, 2015 4:23 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
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