Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
27 Years, 136 Days and 76970 Haiku later...

oh these crazy folks
and their Pokemon GO it's
gone all Pikachu...
Haiku # 54025, July 13, 2016 6:42 pm ET
by vhs
i guess it's become
an on line on going blurb
of dadaism
Haiku # 54024, July 12, 2016 1:23 pm ET
by vhs
Pikachu boners!
Japanime luncheon meat.
Vienna sausage.
Haiku # 54022, July 12, 2016 10:17 am ET
by df
With football we always have exciting games such as head soccer and head soccer unblocked and soccer heads and head soccer 2 or big head basketball big head soccer or head soccer will bring to everyone the good entertainment Best. After work you can play with Big Head Football and Big Head Soccer or Head Soccer to reduce the pressure of work. With big head basketball and Head Soccer and Big Head Football you will have the best experience on the sport king. big head basketball and Head Soccer and Big Head Soccer and Big Head Football will make the most demanding on electronic games must also satisfied. Come to Big Head Football and big head basketball and Big Head Soccer to experience the most wonderful thing. Thank you.
Haiku # 54017, July 11, 2016 4:45 am ET
by cherry
well when you are of
course speaking in toungues one is
not really in control

yaba dabba dooo iffy eply manuever hurvarata twist

what did he say?

he said God wants you to shove your head somewhere
Haiku # 54014, July 10, 2016 12:49 pm ET
by vhs
Here's a better one:
Ass Assassins in Ass Sin.
It rolls off your tongue.
Haiku # 54013, July 10, 2016 8:06 am ET
by Darth Figpucker of course I'm speaking of YOUR tongue, not mine.
Snuffalupagus
Bangs Big Bird's Butt video.
Let's call it snuff porn.

Another porn flick:
Ass Assassins in Her Ass.
I just made it up.
Haiku # 54012, July 10, 2016 5:10 am ET
by df
Nuclear launch codes.
Peanut butter and jelly.
Enormous boner.
Haiku # 54011, July 10, 2016 5:01 am ET
by df
We need a new brand.
Something with a zingy name.
Ameritastic!
Haiku # 54010, July 10, 2016 4:41 am ET
by Uncle Sam of Offshore gambling boat
there's a time to um
complain and then there's a time
to just recover
Haiku # 54009, July 9, 2016 11:32 am ET
by vhs
scrotal itch again
festering, pestering, dang
STDs, bereave
Haiku # 54007, July 8, 2016 5:46 am ET
by Lush
wherein lay the blame
vicious criminals once slain
shall I holster mine?
Haiku # 54006, July 8, 2016 5:43 am ET
by Lush
spying ballsack cleft
I deduced a sordid scheme
half-assed hybrid staff
Haiku # 54005, July 8, 2016 5:41 am ET
by Lush
I sought my better
and awoke desultory
absent solution
Haiku # 54004, July 8, 2016 5:38 am ET
by Lush
vile hysteria
provokes villainous shit smear
silence is golden
Haiku # 54003, July 8, 2016 5:36 am ET
by Lush
They sing quite badly.
This they do until you pay.
Then they go away.
Haiku # 54002, July 8, 2016 12:58 am ET
by Darth Figpucker in search of good coffee
going offline,
island has fresh air,
bluescreen.
Haiku # 54000, July 7, 2016 6:26 pm ET
by rabbit of hole
The bird was fresh killed.
But the cat would not eat it.
Lord, what have I done?
Haiku # 53999, July 7, 2016 6:55 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
I'm teaching my kids
to be cannibalistic.
Perhaps they'll eat me.
Haiku # 53998, July 6, 2016 5:31 am ET
by df
schadenfreude ? too right !
the representative swill
shall rinse and repeat
Haiku # 53995, July 5, 2016 6:11 am ET
by ash
I call this poem
"Yet another dumb haiku".
And now it's over.

Thank you.
Haiku # 53993, July 4, 2016 7:37 pm ET
by df
Never give monkeys
the jobs that white men should do.
Christ, where is Janis?
Out of control spam.
If porn, it would be okay.
"SEO" my ass.
Give them your money.
And it will then disappear.
Likely they're Russian.
Or maybe Chinese.
Or maybe North Korean.
Or from New Jersey.
Haiku # 53992, July 4, 2016 7:34 pm ET
by df hate criminals who rape the bones of their dead grand parents for a buck.
I must need a gun.
That spam website told me so.
Amazing pictures.

I'll spend seven grand.
Sure, I'll trust this foreign site.
It must be legit.

If they scam someone,
I guess they should scam gun freaks.
That's some good scamming.
Haiku # 53989, July 4, 2016 12:59 am ET
by df
don't get me started
on the culture of food when...
man started thinking

with his cultural
gut, then the brain went out the
windows 95 thing...
Haiku # 53988, July 3, 2016 1:08 pm ET
by vhs
I don't get Asians.
Thai food is sooo fucking good.
Yet they like McD!                                
"USA is good!
Crappy ground dog meat gourmet!
Me so upper class."                                  
Makes me want to puke.
Spam is a delicacy?!
They must all be high.                                  
Modern Asian food,
It is pure fucking poison.
Eat at your own risk.                                        
Find an old dirt road.
Walk to the "Grandma Cafe".
Food so good I cried.                                        
Haiku # 53986, July 2, 2016 7:58 pm ET
by df
Oh, I like that name!
"Oh, you, oh poo" is sexy!
Too bad you are spam.
Haiku # 53985, July 2, 2016 7:39 pm ET
by df
If Jesus did it,
I know you can do it too.
We're better than God.

Funny thing is that
we likely taste better too.
Bland bread and cheap wine.

I should bring squirt cheese
and a fifth of Thunderbird.
The priest would just shit!

Holy improvement!
He's never tasted better!
... Father forgive me.
Haiku # 53982, July 1, 2016 3:14 am ET
by df
Do not kill yourself.
That's an unforgiven sin.
Allow us to help.

We'll kill you instead.
Then we will cook and eat you.
You won't go to waste.

Fattened soft poets.
Juicier than Kobe beef.
Slow roasted all day.

Sizzling fat sounds.
The last whine you'll ever make.
The body and blood.
Haiku # 53981, July 1, 2016 3:05 am ET
by df is in nead of you to die for his sins.
the novelty has
worn off but over time it
can become some fun
Haiku # 53980, June 30, 2016 12:39 pm ET
by vhs
i'm going to whine
again, but not kill myself
this is irony
Haiku # 53979, June 30, 2016 12:30 pm ET
by vhs
I burned a haiku.
I wrote it down and lit it.
It screamed horribly.
Haiku # 53978, June 30, 2016 3:49 am ET
by df
I parked a booger.
Right upon the bathroom wall.
It was disgusting.

Though it's no surprise
that I then returned to find
many more boogers.

I counted seven.
It was a booger party.
Great minds think alike.

Haiku # 53977, June 30, 2016 3:45 am ET
by df

This cannot be seen.
An invisible haiku.
The first of its kind.
Haiku # 53976, June 30, 2016 3:35 am ET
by df
Why would I want that?
I do not want to be hard.
But my fat wife does.
Haiku # 53975, June 29, 2016 12:40 am ET
by Darth Figpucker likes to make an ass of himself.
Draw from the Dark Side.
Take power from others' pain.
Drink the tears of "friends".

Their incompetence
allows for opportunity
to find replacements.

Buy a meat grinder.
Keep it well-oiled and clean.
Use them for sausage.

Why aren't there any
cannibalistic Sith Lords?
I guess I'm the first.
Haiku # 53973, June 28, 2016 7:28 pm ET
by df of feel the hate, it gives you power!.... I farted.
apoplexia
serveth no purposeth
swingeth a wide dick
Haiku # 53971, June 27, 2016 10:56 pm ET
by Lush
may i submit joy
via jolly crapulence?
emasculate d(e)a[r]th
Haiku # 53970, June 27, 2016 10:54 pm ET
by Lush of interchangeable letters
ill lamentation
and self annihilation
have enslaved BH
Haiku # 53969, June 27, 2016 10:49 pm ET
by Lush
I feel not but shame.
To live on earth as human.
Better a tape worm.
Haiku # 53968, June 27, 2016 8:21 pm ET
by df
Hunter shot himself
to avoid a painful death,
not 'cause of Nixon!

"People have got to know whether or not their president's a chicken fucker. Well, I'm not a chicken fucker!" -- Nixon
Haiku # 53967, June 27, 2016 3:38 pm ET
by df
I made yo momma!
And then yo momma made you.
Luke, I'm yo daddy!

".... Aw, hell nawwwww!"
Haiku # 53966, June 27, 2016 3:33 pm ET
by df
to the one who must
compare to the other when
hunter s. thompson

saw nixon die then
did he blow his mind out in a
space of his own then

enemies defined
by one another, the point
others do not make

us
Haiku # 53965, June 27, 2016 1:10 pm ET
by vhs
Important Day - 04, July 2016 : Independence Day USA

All Quotes and Images site : Plusquotes.com
Haiku # 53964, June 27, 2016 10:44 am ET
by PlusTeam of USA
Incomplete sentence.
Self-referring poetry.
All merit voided.
Haiku # 53962, June 26, 2016 10:49 pm ET
by df
Why can't we all die?
Earth would be a better place.
No strip malls in sight.
Haiku # 53961, June 26, 2016 10:45 pm ET
by df
The vast ocean shore.
The crashing waves lullaby.
Singing to no one.
Haiku # 53960, June 26, 2016 10:45 pm ET
by df
after all these years
greg has the touch
still suave as fuck
Haiku # 53959, June 26, 2016 9:36 pm ET
by justforSU of /r/stevenuniverse
i miss gen x but
kurt cobain is dead and there's
a zeitgeist shift when

some voice passes on
others have to take their place
who will replace you?

Haiku # 53958, June 26, 2016 12:45 pm ET
by vhs
ego likes to talk
it lacks insight then it dies
what else to say here
Haiku # 53957, June 26, 2016 12:43 pm ET
by vhs
I am obnoxious.
That is an understatement
Poetry is dumb.
Haiku # 53956, June 26, 2016 7:15 am ET
by Darth Figpucker of The High Vogon Poetry Counsel
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