Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
27 Years, 136 Days and 76969 Haiku later...

Hell no, we won't go!
Wait, you're going to Paris?
Well that sounds like fun.
Haiku # 55106, October 18, 2016 10:33 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
shark in your bathtub
she is not here to make friends
record for evidence
Haiku # 55100, October 17, 2016 1:10 am ET
by Lord of the Dance
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Haiku # 55098, October 16, 2016 10:07 pm ET
by towpwoue of USA
hammertoe cheap shoes
young folks meals raimens and spam
older, beans and rice
Haiku # 55097, October 16, 2016 11:14 am ET
by vhs
Ode to Bacon Bits:
You are so damn delicious
Will you marry me?
Haiku # 55096, October 16, 2016 2:55 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
going down to south
park and the jokes are mature
as we mature and

irony is replaced
by networking and selfies
what's a vhs???
Haiku # 55095, October 15, 2016 12:18 pm ET
by vhs
actual donuts
can be pretty dangerous
now, those krispy cremes

(but they sure taste good)
Haiku # 55094, October 14, 2016 2:12 pm ET
by vhs
Router, Wi-Fi, Internet.
IP-address and connect.
192.168.l.l
Haiku # 55093, October 14, 2016 9:53 am ET
by Max of SF
why are things this way
money, sex, religion, fame
dangerous donuts
Haiku # 55092, October 13, 2016 10:09 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
this is becoming
some sort of flotsam or big
art project web site
Haiku # 55091, October 13, 2016 11:26 am ET
by vhs
Cigarettes are gay.
Sucking Death's little white cock.
He'll spooge in your lungs.
Haiku # 55090, October 13, 2016 7:52 am ET
by
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Haiku # 55039, October 13, 2016 6:16 am ET
by Phenq of Houston, Texas
Hug him with passion.
Let him know I mean business.
And grab him by the...
Haiku # 55038, October 11, 2016 11:45 pm ET
by Trump
back alley New York
a mime walks from the shadows
looking for a hug
Haiku # 55037, October 11, 2016 10:54 pm ET
by What would you do?
Jet propelled boners.
Penises flying right off.
Exploding testes.

Foreskin Fuel
Haiku # 55036, October 11, 2016 10:00 pm ET
by df of Cambodia
Men who fuck chickens,
in spite of what they'll tell you,
are chicken fuckers.
Haiku # 54980, October 8, 2016 12:18 am ET
by
Men who fuck chickens,
in spite of what they'll tell you,
are chicken fuckers.
Haiku # 54979, October 8, 2016 12:13 am ET
by df
sad,endless battles
cycle of sin, salvation
spammers and poets
Haiku # 54978, October 7, 2016 9:35 pm ET
by Wholly captcha Batman
When you hack up blood,
the spam wars take a back seat.
I just want to breathe.

It's normal for me.
When I'm sick I hack up blood.
Goddamn allergies.

It's usually
a bad flu that kicks my ass.
Goddamn it all.

The world keeps taking.
The universe is a thief.
And nothing changes.
Haiku # 54976, October 7, 2016 4:27 pm ET
by df
old symptoms return
old enemies come back
we go to war to

beat these enemies
once and for all, but evil
comes back, so does good
Haiku # 54975, October 7, 2016 1:07 pm ET
by vhs
infectious disease
reflecting upon my deeds
future salvation
Haiku # 54974, October 6, 2016 11:02 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Most Asian toilets
do not have tanks in the back;
flush with a bucket.

And forget TP;
Pour water down your backside,
scrubbing with your hand.

There is never soap.
Think of this when you eat out.
See the waiter's hands.

To take a good dump,
Yankee style with TP,
find a McDonald's.

Toilets in the malls
do not even have TP
unless you buy it.

Often there's no seat,
only a bowl for squatting.
A good thigh workout.

But the worst part is
that the floors are always wet
from water sloshing.

Keep your pants or shorts
high and dry off of the floor
or it will be gross.

Who wants buffet now?
All you can eat at the new
Mandarin Palace!
Haiku # 54973, October 6, 2016 7:24 pm ET
by How to Poop in Asia of Up shit creek without Charmin.
a modella ranco
bumperswat enel
guatemala hotel
basy pavia
morden 2072
wifi fam chavez c
rent a car charlotte
private avenida
community hall 4400
wash prudential realty
public bell street
84-86 north st
01785 legaria
winston caravan
Haiku # 54972, October 6, 2016 7:05 pm ET
by sooo artistic!
I think that Janis
should give someone who has time
control of this site.

To delete all spam.
And we will have peace at last.
The angels will sing.

My new idea:
I'm going to post captchas.
Sounds like loads of fun.
Haiku # 54971, October 6, 2016 7:01 pm ET
by df
Inappropriate
public bleeding is needed
to push back the spam.
Haiku # 54970, October 6, 2016 4:14 pm ET
by df
Exactly correct.
I've been on my period.
Spammers drink my blood.
Haiku # 54969, October 6, 2016 4:12 pm ET
by df
in fact i dare say
i can't abide such a dot
period piece here
Haiku # 54968, October 6, 2016 3:43 pm ET
by vhs
let us see if we
can despam the space or the space
cadets will win this one
Haiku # 54967, October 6, 2016 3:43 pm ET
by vhs
you know when i post
here it is going along
with the shit and the

tar, knowing fetish
lives I have known, what's hu cow?
now that's a weird one
Haiku # 54861, October 5, 2016 12:07 pm ET
by vhs
Perhaps you are right.
But I can't resist chickens.
They are just so tight.
Haiku # 54860, October 5, 2016 9:27 am ET
by Darth Figpucker
Cows are not sexy
Even when wearing lipstick
One must have limits
Haiku # 54859, October 5, 2016 8:51 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Cats puking hairballs
sound much like your grandparents
when they are fucking.
Haiku # 54809, October 5, 2016 7:04 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Fuck today not happy,
I was happy,
Not happy but fuck
Haiku # 54808, October 5, 2016 7:02 am ET
by FU
I guess you could say
that I'm on my period.
I know, that was bad.
Haiku # 54806, October 4, 2016 10:40 pm ET
by df
It'll also save a lot of cash and time for those on gdbkccccckdgcfkc
Haiku # 54750, October 4, 2016 7:56 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet of USA
I think that's cake mix.
Please note the spatula.
And the wooden board.

Could be cookie dough.
Got me craving sweets, dammit.
No, I'll do sit ups.
Haiku # 54748, October 4, 2016 6:50 am ET
by df
This Venus Flytrap
Baited with crazy sickness
Keeps drawing me back
Haiku # 54747, October 3, 2016 10:18 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Observe the ridges
One imagines puckering
As it emerges
Haiku # 54746, October 3, 2016 10:14 pm ET
by Poopologist of Scatland University
I will stop being
so absolutely nasty
when the spam has stopped.
Will Janis do it?
Will she disallow coding?
I kind of doubt it.
Just disable the
greater than and less than keys
to stop the live links.
The spam will then stop.
And I will stop posting poop.
And we'll be normal.
Haiku # 54736, October 2, 2016 11:17 pm ET
by
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Haiku # 54723, October 2, 2016 10:54 am ET
by Diana Burgess of usa
The internet is
only real if you wish it.
Otherwise it's not.

Go for a long walk.
The fall trees are orange and red.
They're not digital.

But it would be really cool if we genetically engineered oak trees to have leaves with porn on them taken from websites that the trees are linked to. It won't be long. Seriously.
Haiku # 54722, October 1, 2016 12:29 pm ET
by df
twenty five years and
The Internet is not just
a place for absurd

it IS the mainstream
it is a weird mainstream and
I am not ready
Haiku # 54721, October 1, 2016 11:36 am ET
by vhs
cultural lasses
showing their sexy asses
rose colored glasses
Haiku # 54720, October 1, 2016 2:42 am ET
by Tina is a hooker of Neighborhood rugby team
Cultural mores
for this day and age should be
cultural lesses.

Poop!
Haiku # 54719, September 30, 2016 9:40 pm ET
by
the days come and go
and with time so do lives and
cultural mores
Haiku # 54717, September 30, 2016 1:49 pm ET
by vhs
here is a nice place
writing words that take up space
spraying bears with mace
Haiku # 54716, September 30, 2016 1:21 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
does anyone remember
who bob hope was and why do
i remember classic movies
but dont see very many of them nowadays except maybe Plan Nine From Outer Space

Ed Wood Junior
is dead but he left us Tor
and Glen or Glenda
Haiku # 54715, September 29, 2016 8:36 pm ET
by vhs
Today, while I was at work, my sister stole my apple ipad and tested to see if it can survive a 30 foot drop, just so she can be a youtube sensation. My apple ipad is now destroyed and she has 83 views. I know this is entirely off topic but I had to share it with someone!
Haiku # 54714, September 29, 2016 5:29 pm ET
by poppyiiu of USA
Fuck you,
What do you mean sent a shit at this lovely site?
Damn you son of bitch, you insultted the haiku site more than spam!
Haiku # 54713, September 29, 2016 3:59 pm ET
by euekde
They'll remove the poop
but the spam stays as it is
I don't get this.


Look, it's Donald Trump!
Wait, no, it's just the hair's same.
Facial features too.

Spam: Haiku #54708 Haiku #54707 Haiku #54706 Haiku #54705 Haiku #54704 Haiku #54700 Haiku #54699 Haiku #54520 Haiku #54519 Haiku #54516
Haiku # 54712, September 29, 2016 12:29 pm ET
by df
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