BAD HAIKU - Horrible poetry for the digital age
21 Years
7 Days
and
57669 Haikus
later...
Sometimes something is so disturbing
It's hilarious
And vice versa

"Possibly in Michigan":

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=lt8rfsm2mUE
Haiku #56832, by Thomas the Winged Cat
June 14, 2017 1:57 pm ET

Many ways to die
Not many ways to survive
And yet here I am
Haiku #56831, by Schrodinger's Cat
June 14, 2017 1:11 pm ET

i like Robot Monster
gorilla with space helmet
just for the monster

can i see Marcel
DuChamp coming up
with a dadaist

masterpiece like
the gorilla suit with
the diving helmet???
Haiku #56830, by vhs
June 14, 2017 11:26 am ET

i have this theory
that trash comes in many forms
and that trash like plan

nine from outer space
is accidental art but
kathy griffith's stunt

was trying too hard
to be art but it was just
trash to begin with
Haiku #56829, by vhs
June 14, 2017 11:22 am ET

the sky is blue, and
right now not thinking of this
or that, there it is
Haiku #56828, by vhs
June 14, 2017 10:53 am ET

if i dig theory
about big bangs and things like
that then this expanse

of space time will end
in a big crunch, entropy
then it will blow up

into a new space time
how does nothing blow up, hmm?
one name says Kramer

Seinfeld reference
Haiku #56827, by vhs
June 14, 2017 10:47 am ET

got it together
until entropy prevailed
and i fell apart
Haiku #56826, by ash
June 14, 2017 4:54 am ET

Do you have oleo?
Oleo for my bunghole?
Haiku #56825, by Anonymous Poet
June 14, 2017 2:46 am ET

When I feel good I play under warm distress
Pass it up on a better day
Well you got whatcha want you never knew
Perfect gift from me to you
Got shackles on my wings on tight
Beggin' makin' compromise
Fast enough it's hard to hide
Sometimes I want to disappear
Haiku #56824, by dvd
June 13, 2017 10:22 pm ET

Wolf in lamb's clothing
Right side up veganism
Quite controversial
Haiku #56823, by Drooling Lamb
June 13, 2017 9:57 pm ET

Rewards at the sea
Gift of life against the waves
Child laughs across fields
Haiku #56822, by Olea europaea
June 13, 2017 9:55 pm ET

Signals on the ice
Hidden smile assaults the air
People live nearby
Haiku #56821, by Olea europaea
June 13, 2017 9:54 pm ET

Eating of fire
Hidden smile is always true
Lament of today
Haiku #56820, by Olea europaea
June 13, 2017 9:53 pm ET

Resenting mountain
Bird of prey now understands
Sharing on the ice
Haiku #56819, by Olea europaea
June 13, 2017 9:52 pm ET

Light shines idle
Frozen time bathing in light
Repeating riddles
Haiku #56818, by Olea europaea
June 13, 2017 9:51 pm ET

Adoring strangers
Tiny joys within my soul
Shining in between
Haiku #56817, by Olea europaea
June 13, 2017 9:51 pm ET

Ending of secrets
Absolute truth a danger
Good reason hiding
Haiku #56816, by Olea europaea
June 13, 2017 9:50 pm ET

Lamb in wolf's clothing
Upside down veganism
Not controversial
Haiku #56815, by Drooling Wolf
June 13, 2017 9:38 pm ET

How many haiku
have you thought and then forgot
before writing down?

I have no hope for this world.
Are manatees edible?
Would they make a good roast for sandwiches?
Orangutan vs. chimp knife fights.
Rice wine fermented in a cask containing the powdered,
baked bones of Himalayan tribe children.
Because shit flows downhill.

She switched the pills at the nursing home with Viagra.
Then live streamed the resulting fiasco.
People pay for that shit.
Haiku #56814, by df
June 13, 2017 9:19 pm ET

wearable eternity becoming daydreamer balance autonomous erotica vampire apology available

June 13
Haiku #56813, by dvd
June 13, 2017 6:00 pm ET

bunny communication loophole habitual bewitching document largest daydreamer lavender bunny

April 1
Haiku #56812, by dvd
June 13, 2017 5:59 pm ET

wolves guaranteed vampire deletion mother almighty cosmic fashion born confidential

March 14
Haiku #56811, by dvd
June 13, 2017 5:57 pm ET

acrobat club bottomless truth polite biology available predict open sadness

March 10
Haiku #56810, by dvd
June 13, 2017 5:56 pm ET

Can't sleep - clowns are after me
Good thing I've got a weapon
Deadly Spider Gun (TM)
Haiku #56809, by Whitey Everyday
June 13, 2017 1:12 pm ET

i shouldn't be so
confident right now but i
am, it sounds silly

because i am used
to having low self esteem
and now have pretty

high self esteem well
it's ironic I'm confident
and I'll deal with it
Haiku #56808, by vhs
June 13, 2017 11:16 am ET

the way i see it
if i can do nothing right
then you've got me wrong
Haiku #56807, by ash
June 13, 2017 3:32 am ET

this life is scary
my own cells out to kill me
auto-terrorist
Haiku #56806, by ash
June 12, 2017 11:05 pm ET

The hot new toy for
Christmas twenty seventeen...
Deadly Spider Gun
Haiku #56805, by Mandingo Ebola
June 12, 2017 10:19 pm ET

The only thing scarier than spiders
Are guns
The only thing scarier than these
Must be some sort of spider gun
Would that be a gun made of spiders
Or a spider made of guns?
Haiku #56804, by Whitey Everyday of Asking The Important Questions
June 12, 2017 6:53 pm ET

Echoes in the spring
Rising sun overcome with joy
Petals fall sudden

Knife cuts among friends
Forgotten in front of joy
Music plays truthful
Haiku #56803, by dvd
June 12, 2017 4:44 pm ET

Summer spreads carefree
Singing bird destined to pass
Petals fall greedy

Struggles of fire
Autumn rain is free to be
Wolf howls with relief
Haiku #56802, by dvd
June 12, 2017 4:35 pm ET

a lot of growing
old is seeing the people
who had been around

as icons die and
become a part of the past
and then much later

historical icons
Haiku #56801, by vhs
June 12, 2017 2:43 pm ET

men have many good
qualities but women DO
balance a lot of

the excess of "men"
out and vice versa, this is
why two genders....erm...

plus
Haiku #56800, by vhs
June 12, 2017 2:25 pm ET

mow the lawn, think one
has all the time in the world
remember the H2O

avoid the bugs and
listen to the latest news
about scary stunts
Haiku #56799, by vhs
June 12, 2017 2:05 pm ET

i like the transcend
ent stuff right now, there's just this
in the now and not

enough relax, sit
tree, mountain, river sounds dumb
it isn't, shup up, watch
Haiku #56798, by vhs
June 12, 2017 1:56 pm ET

the poetry of the
romantic comes along when
it is time to put

away the childish world
of Pulp Fiction and the Gen
X Party Scenesters

But I will always say Mst3k is eternal
Haiku #56797, by vhs
June 12, 2017 1:45 pm ET

one wants to transcend
the nonsense of this
plane of existence

the other wishes
to roil in the samsara
and heckle the world

i tire of the world
of ugliness and conflict
Emerson Rises

if necessary, Lake and Palmer
as well
Haiku #56796, by vhs
June 12, 2017 1:43 pm ET

I, the one-eyed wonder worm.
I, the contraceptive Sponge Bob.
I, the goat sphincter stinked her away.

Nothing more to say.

6-6-6
Haiku #56795, by Anonymous Poet
June 11, 2017 10:59 pm ET

I, the third eye

I, the sponge

I am everyone else

And I am only her.


APRIL 11 2017
Haiku #56794, by bravoecho
June 11, 2017 10:45 pm ET

don't take a bath when you're thirsty.

don't settle for wooden fruit.

let your life be bountiful

let it be okay to have the things you need
Haiku #56793, by bravoecho
June 11, 2017 10:43 pm ET

we can't be trusted with this flame

we can't be trusted to tend to it

we can't be trusted not to let it burn our lives down

and we cannot be trusted not to let it die quietly in our midst.

premature

immature

what we've lost we may never know

what we've lost we may never get back.

sometimes I pray we're given another chance

to keep it alive.

to care


APRIL 21 2017
Haiku #56792, by bravoecho
June 11, 2017 10:41 pm ET

Adam West pulled down more pussy than Hugh Hefner.
The Batman and Robin orgies are legendary.
If I were there, I would have been the Joker.
But were there drugs? That would have been ironic.

Na na na na na
na na na na na na na
na na na na Batman!

Not quite a haiku, but that's okay.
Haiku #56791, by Anonymous Poet
June 11, 2017 6:17 pm ET

i had to look that
up about Adam West, i
wonder if people

might check out the old
shows sooner or later, I
think they were ahead

of their time with the
speed that they went at, adam
is gone, quite a thought...
Haiku #56790, by vhs
June 11, 2017 10:50 am ET

bye, caped crusader
bat signal fades in the west
and it's like, kapow !
Haiku #56789, by ash
June 11, 2017 12:13 am ET

well i hate to be
older, i want my body to
do my thing not do

it's own thing without
any sense it needs to keep on
trucking and working
Haiku #56788, by vhs
June 10, 2017 1:32 pm ET

People take easy
Over the inconvenient
There's less resistance

But what do I know
I'm just a guy that likes to
Haiku on the roof
Haiku #56787, by adam ben adam
June 10, 2017 12:36 pm ET

i wonder why times
like these fall apart into
polarized sub sets
Haiku #56786, by vhs
June 10, 2017 12:28 pm ET

if you are into
yoga then your body just
might behave itself
Haiku #56785, by vhs
June 10, 2017 12:03 pm ET

the body fights with the
mind over who is in charge
eventually the mind

leaves the body and the
body dies, either the mind goes
up or down or comes back
Haiku #56784, by vhs
June 10, 2017 12:02 pm ET

Flush toilet and spray
My sensors detect methane
Congratulations
Haiku #56783, by Smart Toilet #1
June 10, 2017 12:02 pm ET