BAD HAIKU - Horrible poetry for the digital age
17 Years
159 Days
and
50878 Haikus
later...
Suffalupagus.
It makes the best hamburger!
That's why they're extinct.

And for thanksgiving
we're gong to have Bird Bird.
Please pass the gravy.
Haiku #50878, by Anonymous Poet
April 19, 2014 8:14 am ET

Anything for drugs.
I'll even snort a kitten.
And cat litter too.
Haiku #50877, by Anonymous Poet
April 19, 2014 8:04 am ET

Hi Mom, I made news!
Check out that whopper dildo!
Aren't you proud of me?
Haiku #50876, by evil book of Newark New Jersey
April 18, 2014 5:04 pm ET

I heard a great song.
"Jesus Christ is My Nigga".
Yes, it's on YouTube.
Haiku #50875, by Christians are Insane. of Space Station
April 16, 2014 3:26 pm ET

Haiku #50874, by woipoiow of USA
April 16, 2014 4:38 am ET

Studboy cannot count.
Send his ass back to grade school.
Why am I so mean?
Haiku #50873, by Darth Figpucker
April 14, 2014 1:27 pm ET

Las Vegas bender
spent elderly slot monsters
South point lint lizards
Haiku #50872, by 5150 of LA
April 14, 2014 1:11 am ET

haiku still on fire
for you alone, I'll tell all
my voices are awesome
Haiku #50871, by studboy of Venice, CA
April 14, 2014 1:01 am ET

my haiku is on fire
from mad skills and whiskey? -- No
I blame the full moon
Haiku #50870, by studboy of Venice, CA
April 14, 2014 12:58 am ET

Self moderation
Right here is a tricky thing
Sink down and fight it

Or leave it alone
Time will tell, but for now, best
just to say goodbye
Haiku #50869, by Anonymous Poet
April 12, 2014 7:14 pm ET

No, I'm not busy.
I was just picking my nose.
Stop writing poems.

What fag writes poems
to inattentive drivers?
Flip me off instead!
Haiku #50868, by Anonymous Poet
April 12, 2014 4:31 pm ET

Use your turn signal!
Are you really that busy
With the radio?
Haiku #50867, by Anonymous Poet
April 11, 2014 10:57 pm ET

You can pick your friends
And you can pick your nose.
But you can't wipe your friends
on the back of the couch.
Haiku #50866, by Bad Poetry of 19 2698826
April 9, 2014 9:08 am ET

The time loop ends here.
You are free to have free will.
Pick that, or your nose.
Haiku #50865, by 0
April 9, 2014 12:54 am ET

I went to the zoo.
I saw some strange animals.
They weren't in cages.
Haiku #50864, by Anonymous Poet
April 8, 2014 9:02 pm ET

Monkeys and Poodles
Michael Jackson and Hitler
It's a mad, mad world!
Haiku #50863, by 0
April 7, 2014 8:44 pm ET

Tie up the poodle.
Let a monkey hump its leg.
Revenge is so sweet.
Haiku #50862, by Anonymous Poet
April 7, 2014 10:33 am ET

Tiger is lonely
Monkey knows it can not help
Snow plow scuba dive
Haiku #50861, by Anonymous Poet
April 6, 2014 11:29 pm ET

So appropriate
Snuffy was such a good dog
Little leg humper
Haiku #50860, by Mandingo Ebola of Joni Mitchell
April 5, 2014 4:36 am ET

Haiku #50859, by tpyiiyup of USA
April 5, 2014 3:50 am ET

Now pull my finger.
No, you pull my finger first.
Together on three...
Haiku #50858, by Anonymous Poet
April 5, 2014 2:06 am ET

Haiku #50857, by Anonymous Poet
April 5, 2014 2:04 am ET

If you we're honest
What would you say to yourself?
Would it blow your mind?
Haiku #50856, by Shamdingo Ricola of inside you
April 5, 2014 1:52 am ET

I will count to three
Hoping things will get better
One, two, three,....nothing
Haiku #50855, by Phosphorous necktie
April 4, 2014 11:02 pm ET

Homophobia?!
I ain't scared o' no faggots!
Well, except my dad.
Haiku #50854, by Anonymous Poet
April 4, 2014 10:35 am ET

Homophobia
Is a sickness with a cure
Hope you get well soon
Haiku #50853, by Anonymous Poet
April 4, 2014 8:49 am ET

enthusiastic
necrobestiality
homosexual

hyperfancyness
necropedozoophile
cannibalism

He's a fag in drag.
Bangs dead baby animals.
Then eats them all up.
Haiku #50852, by Pooch McNuggets - Eating Dog Tastes Good! of How fancy is that?
April 3, 2014 8:42 am ET

Anthropomorphic
Is a five syllable word
How fancy is that?
Haiku #50851, by Anonymous Poet
April 1, 2014 8:57 pm ET

My mind is now blank.
I can't think of anything.
So I will write this.
Haiku #50850, by Anonymous Poet
April 1, 2014 8:39 pm ET

Pimpin' ain't easy
You should become drug dealer
Go work for Phizer
Haiku #50849, by Mandingo Ebola
March 31, 2014 8:38 am ET

Be your own boss then.
You could be a bad-ass pimp.
Makin' that money!
Haiku #50848, by Free financial advice from a homeless man. of Wall Street sidewalk begging for spare change I can belive in.
March 30, 2014 7:51 am ET

Hey boss, go eat poop
Can't give me some more money?
Or health insurance?
Haiku #50847, by Anonymous Poet
March 28, 2014 11:06 pm ET

Vaginoriffic!
Sublimy slimy funk blast.
Hairs stuck in my teeth.
Haiku #50846, by Anonymous Poet
March 28, 2014 6:12 pm ET

Boner pills are great!
I eat them like they're candy
and wear baggy pants.
Haiku #50845, by Darth Figpucker of Perpetual Erection Machine
March 27, 2014 10:09 am ET

Haiku #50844, by uowyouyy of USA
March 27, 2014 4:49 am ET

I am a racist!
I hate the whole human race.
Now give me your cash!
Haiku #50843, by Anonymous Poet
March 27, 2014 1:29 am ET

Nobody should rob
Nobody should be racist
But they do and are.
Haiku #50842, by Anonymous Poet
March 26, 2014 11:49 pm ET

I'd rather be robbed
by a black man with a gun
than cracker with pen.

Damn lawyers and banks!
They are the true robbers here.
My paycheck is gone.
Haiku #50841, by Fuck Whitey! of Down in Deep South, Lookin' for White Women.
March 26, 2014 10:30 pm ET

Black persons gather,
Can't go night witohut robbin'
Them honest white folk.
Haiku #50840, by Filip
March 26, 2014 12:01 pm ET

I wear white Speedos.
I like to show off my junk.
Pardon the skid marks.
Haiku #50839, by Anonymous Poet
March 23, 2014 8:11 pm ET

Like it or not; Spring!
So much better than winter.
Time to wear Speedos
Haiku #50838, by Euro Beach Bear
March 23, 2014 2:07 pm ET

This is my planet.
You've overstayed your welcome.
Please go and stay gone.
Haiku #50837, by Anonymous Poet
March 22, 2014 3:48 pm ET

Guns are like douche bags.
When there is trouble at hand,
They can cause haiku.

Haiku #50836, by Anonymous Poet
March 22, 2014 3:46 pm ET

I'm a proud douche bag.
Least I'm not an enema.
Fags use enemas.

An enema is
a douche bag used by faggots;
pre-butt-fuck rinsing.
Haiku #50835, by Vaginal Hemhorrage Slime
March 22, 2014 1:01 pm ET

Bad itch in my eye
I am going to cry *sniff*
More salt hurts worse, mom!
Haiku #50834, by Roberuto_Renga of plains of despair
March 22, 2014 9:58 am ET

See sleepy people
Wee sheep seeking through peephole
Meek peeks at chic freaks
Haiku #50833, by Anonymous Poet
March 22, 2014 3:25 am ET

Haiku are like guns.
In the hands of a douche bag,
They can cause trouble.
Haiku #50832, by Anonymous Poet
March 20, 2014 8:25 pm ET

Saying "bad haiku".
That is far too redundant.
All haiku are bad.
Haiku #50831, by Anonymous Poet of Treading the booger fields of snotdom and nostril hairs
March 20, 2014 7:26 pm ET

Ideas, thoughts, feelings
Hover all day, and at night,
Spin like toilet water
Haiku #50830, by Anonymous Poet
March 19, 2014 5:24 pm ET

A dyslexic gay man saved up for a vacation to Geneva. After looking around he was very disappointed; there was no large hardon collider.
Haiku #50829, by evil bastard of New Jersey
March 19, 2014 4:53 pm ET