BAD HAIKU - Horrible poetry for the digital age
17 Years
253 Days
and
51073 Haikus
later...
That sounds fair to me
Your cat has been declawed right?
Otherwise, no thanks.
Haiku #51069, by Anonymous Poet
July 20, 2014 2:01 pm ET

I guess that was me.
Apologies, my good man.
I was really drunk.

But to make things right,
you can poop in my yard too.
And wipe with my cat.
Haiku #51068, by Darth Douche Bag.
July 20, 2014 12:58 pm ET

Who pooped in my yard?
Seriously, who does that?
Get a life douche bag!
Haiku #51067, by Anonymous Poet
July 20, 2014 1:18 am ET

And now they are back.
Boner spam before coffee.
That just isn't right.

Find them with "who is".
Email them scans of your ass.
It's all we can do.

Seriously though. I used to bait those "Nigerian prince" scammers and when I had them believing I would wire them money or give them bank info, I would scan my ass (all spread apart and showing the nasty bits and my balls too), attach it in a word doc, and email it to them. Fun times those were.
Haiku #51065, by DF
July 18, 2014 9:22 am ET

There should be none now
Goddammed fucking boner pills
Defacing my site.
Haiku #51063, by Janis
July 17, 2014 2:17 pm ET

When I'm president.
All spammers will be shot dead.
Without a trial.
Haiku #51062, by Anonymous Poet
July 17, 2014 2:12 pm ET

Boy do I wonder
How many Viagra ads
There are on here

There is no need for
Your stupid pills and boner
Juice, please leave us now
Haiku #51060, by Kave Wixon
July 17, 2014 2:30 am ET

My ass has talent.
I can fart with perfect pitch.
And not leave one stain.
Haiku #51053, by Anonymous Poet
July 16, 2014 12:01 am ET

We're the all singing,
all dancing crap of the world.
Hankey Christmas Poo.
Haiku #51052, by Anonymous Poet
July 15, 2014 11:58 pm ET

The first rule of the
Haiku club is you don't talk
About haiku club
Haiku #51051, by Tyler
July 15, 2014 12:38 am ET

I met with the guy
He gave me blue crystal meth
Are you Walter White?
Haiku #51050, by Jossoy Ponkmon
July 15, 2014 12:31 am ET

Germany wins cup
Now athletic supporters
Have drinking excuse
Haiku #51049, by Anonymous Poet
July 13, 2014 5:49 pm ET

Every bomb used
will create more enemies
than it can destroy.
Haiku #51048, by Anonymous Poet
July 13, 2014 10:22 am ET

Did I see Alice?
She is down the rabbit hole.
But which pill to take?

Boner pills are great.
I need one that keeps me hard.
Post ejaculate.

If you saw Alice,
you would ejaculate too.
She is just that hot.
Haiku #51047, by Will Obama Care pay for my boner pills?
July 13, 2014 9:27 am ET

ambient vacuum
where silence assumes the helm
throb throb throb throb mmmm
Haiku #51046, by Lush
July 13, 2014 1:50 am ET

My garbage ocean
Insatiable desire
Represses all dreams
Haiku #51045, by Tractor pull of Sunday at the Rodeo grounds
July 12, 2014 2:02 am ET

Did you Cialis?
This is Viagra culture.
I can Levitrate!
Haiku #51044, by Smoke Horny Goat Weed.
July 11, 2014 2:47 pm ET

The capture scares me,
but I press on, in struggle
to express something
Haiku #51042, by Awkward Silence
July 10, 2014 3:28 am ET

we don't favour guns
our passive regressive team
censor their actions
Haiku #51041, by ash
July 9, 2014 6:52 am ET

No, Ash, you are wrong.
All the governments are cunts.
Control freaks with guns.
Haiku #51040, by DF
July 8, 2014 10:34 pm ET

PMs of Aus / Can
Glaring fuckheads are they both
Cut from the same cloth
Haiku #51039, by Janis
July 8, 2014 11:49 am ET

You think your job is
Bad. Not as bad as all the
V1494r4 spambots
Haiku #51038, by Janis of TDot
July 8, 2014 11:46 am ET

i am quite ashamed
that my country's government
are a bunch of cunts
Haiku #51037, by ash of australia
July 8, 2014 5:28 am ET

Read my bird like words.
Flittering around, pooping
On your minds' windshield
Haiku #51036, by Anonymous Poet
July 8, 2014 12:07 am ET

Here's a correction:
Say "I need to learn me some".
You'll sound more smarter.
Haiku #51031, by Darth Figpucker, Inc. of Not where I want to be.
July 4, 2014 9:50 am ET

Propane combustion.
Carbon dioxide cookoff.
Imminent demise.

Self-oxidizer.
Detonation enjoyment.
Have a happy Fourth.
Haiku #51030, by Darth Figpucker, Inc. of Russian Brothel
July 4, 2014 9:43 am ET

I am not too smart.
Do big words make good poems?
I need to learn some.
Haiku #51027, by Anonymous Poet
July 3, 2014 4:45 pm ET

You are child of wind
Replicate at your own cost
Dues paid anyway
Haiku #51026, by Anonymous Poet
July 3, 2014 6:36 am ET

I like squirrels lots
My mind was consumed by 'bots
Tell me who I am
Haiku #51024, by Poof
July 3, 2014 3:06 am ET

Right now it looks like WordPress is the top blogging platform available right now. from what I've read Is that what you're using on your blog? ekbfdkkckake
Haiku #51023, by wryueoew of USA
July 3, 2014 2:06 am ET

worthy misprision
surreptitious rendition
fairness in warfare
Haiku #51022, by Lush
July 2, 2014 11:16 pm ET

Happy humping frogs.
Their deafening chorus shrieks.
Mire of tadpole soup.
Haiku #51021, by Anonymous Poet
July 2, 2014 3:51 pm ET

You must become art.
Then you will be an artist.
Otherwise you won't.
Haiku #51020, by Anonymous Poet
July 2, 2014 3:48 pm ET

While reading here, I
wonder "what good can this be?"
Can't pretend to know
Haiku #51019, by Awkward Silence
July 1, 2014 8:21 pm ET

And He looked on man.
And He was disappointed.
Genesis 6:6.
Haiku #51017, by Anonymous Poet
June 30, 2014 8:24 pm ET

Think only good thoughts.
The perverts will disappear.
God will strike them down.
Haiku #51016, by Anonymous Poet
June 30, 2014 8:23 pm ET

Push the envelope.
Just how bad can haiku be?
VD twat tartar.
Haiku #51015, by Anonymous Poet
June 30, 2014 3:27 pm ET

Children taste yummy.
Albert Fish is my hero.
Dahmer was a punk.
Haiku #51014, by Anonymous Poet
June 30, 2014 3:24 pm ET

I don't love my wife.
I have better sex with whores.
Marriage is a farce.
Haiku #51013, by Anonymous Poet
June 29, 2014 7:46 pm ET

Awkward Silence sucks
Learn how to count dracula
Lush and V H S
Haiku #51012, by Mandingo Ebola
June 29, 2014 2:57 am ET

Escargots basket
Flip Wilson mumbled, god stumbled
I want tartar sauce
Haiku #51011, by Awkward Silence
June 29, 2014 2:22 am ET

basketed ergot
slipped as I stumbled, tumbled
If I hadn't tripped?
Haiku #51008, by Lush
June 27, 2014 5:04 am ET

Lush, thou art verily
a macracanthorhynchus
hirudinaceus
Haiku #51007, by :-)
June 26, 2014 9:27 pm ET

You can pick your nose
You can also pick your friends
But you can't wipe your friends on the back of the couch.
Haiku #51006, by Anonymous Poet
June 26, 2014 9:23 pm ET

You can pick your nose
You can also pick your friends
Can't pick your friend's nose
Haiku #51005, by Awkward Silence
June 26, 2014 11:15 am ET

devoid of hubris
never found a thing to fake
balderdashing
Haiku #51003, by Lush
June 25, 2014 10:12 pm ET

Why not LSD?
I mean, fuck these boner pills!
What fag can't get hard.

Fucking parasites!
Pharmaceutical dick breaths.
Russian spam export.

I want acid online.
To get my trip from good labs.
Sent straight to my house.
Haiku #51002, by Anonymous Poet
June 22, 2014 12:52 pm ET

Hot Thai girl on bus.
I think "Please don't get boner."
But of course she does.
Haiku #51000, by DF
June 21, 2014 1:14 pm ET

Are you now flacid?
Perhaps flatulent as well?
Beano Viagra!
Haiku #50999, by DF
June 20, 2014 8:11 am ET

Extreme eloquence.
Electronic thesaurus.
Penile stimuli.
Haiku #50998, by DF
June 20, 2014 8:08 am ET