BAD HAIKU - Horrible poetry for the digital age
17 Years
321 Days
and
51473 Haikus
later...
Algorithmic spooge.
Mechanistic humping toy.
In walks my money.
Haiku #51473, by Anonymous Poet
September 29, 2014 2:58 pm ET

Lets all do some stuff.
We can do things after that.
It just might be fun.
Haiku #51472, by Anonymous Poet
September 29, 2014 2:50 pm ET

Scamming pill websites.
Send your money overseas.
Nigerian scammers.

Scam Scam Scam Scam Scam.
Scam Scam Scam Scam Scam Scam Scam.
Scam Scam Scam Scam Scam.

And now the weather.
In other news, I farted.
It covered Thailand.
Haiku #51471, by Anonymous Poet
September 29, 2014 11:45 am ET

she said, If You Leave...
so I Ran (So Far Away)
Sheila Take a Bow
Haiku #51469, by Lush
September 29, 2014 3:53 am ET

In The Air Tonight
Separate Ways (Worlds Apart)
Ain't Talkin' 'Bout Love
Haiku #51468, by Lush of School Dance
September 29, 2014 3:21 am ET

There are no numbers.
God told me so in a dream.
Give me your money.
Haiku #51467, by Anonymous Poet
September 28, 2014 6:52 pm ET

Far poop sniff trance wank
Stafford shire pueblo robs bank
New under the sun
Haiku #51465, by Beagle the Destroyer
September 28, 2014 5:00 am ET

have Cat Scratch Fever,
so Don't Stand So Close to Me
need Doctor Feel Good
Haiku #51463, by Beagle the Destroyer
September 28, 2014 12:22 am ET

Fire on the Mountain.
Hey Aqualung! Run away!
Don't stop believing
Haiku #51462, by Anonymous Poet
September 28, 2014 12:16 am ET

And the winner is;
The Anonymous Poet
Score was five to four
Haiku #51447, by Mandingo Ricola Ebola
September 26, 2014 12:14 am ET

A spam-free website?!
Janis is on top of things!
I'm a happy nerd.
Haiku #51437, by Anonymous Poet
September 24, 2014 12:43 am ET

What Spider-Man eats?
Maybe lots of flies and moths.
That would really suck
Haiku #51436, by Math sucks
September 23, 2014 9:21 pm ET

Arrogant teacher,
and an unprepared student
Bad combination
Haiku #51435, by Anonymous Poet
September 22, 2014 11:18 pm ET

That, sir, would be you.
Asking what's a twat-waffle
means that that is you.
Haiku #51434, by Anonymous Poet
September 22, 2014 4:35 pm ET

What's a twat-waffle?
I've heard it, but I don't know.
Someone please tell me.
Haiku #51433, by Anonymous Poet
September 21, 2014 11:25 pm ET

There is no beauty.
Ugliness does not exist.
Calm your mind and be.
Haiku #51432, by poems are not to be trusted
September 21, 2014 11:20 pm ET

Mind. Your. Own. Business.
Else. You. Are. Just. A. Douchebag.
Dingleberry-breath.
Haiku #51431, by Anonymous Poet
September 21, 2014 11:10 pm ET

Important suffix
Semicolon, period
Commas are the worst
Haiku #51430, by Anonymous Poet
September 21, 2014 10:47 pm ET

Where are the spammers?
Did the FBI trick work?
Oh, I wish; if only!

Go to the spam websites and in their "contact" link type in an FBI or DEA phone number for them to call back. I did that a few times on those scam loan links and scam pill links. I wonder if they called the FBI and DEA. That would be funny! Damn, I'm an evil fucker. I love being evil. And cannibalism is like soooo 1995.
Haiku #51429, by Darth Farty Pants Figpucker.
September 21, 2014 11:12 am ET

It's Saturday night
I'm making stupid poems
I party soooo hard!
Haiku #51428, by Mandingo Ricola Ebola
September 20, 2014 11:01 pm ET

goodbye
Haiku #51427, by Anonymous Poet
September 19, 2014 6:08 pm ET

goodbye
Haiku #51426, by Anonymous Poet
September 19, 2014 6:08 pm ET

goodbye
Haiku #51425, by Anonymous Poet
September 19, 2014 6:08 pm ET

goodbye
Haiku #51424, by Anonymous Poet
September 19, 2014 6:08 pm ET

fuck... they love antagonizing me don't the little faggots.... I would like to burn them alive I really would.
Haiku #51420, by Anonymous Poet
September 19, 2014 1:18 pm ET

Okay, here's an idea....
On these spam websites is a contact page.
You can click that and send them rude messages, but what good will that do? Waste of time.

However, I think it would be interesting to send them what might seem a legit message to (1) waste their time and (2) for a return contact phone number put the phone number of your local FBI, ATF, DEA offices and/or even local police.

So, that's what I've been doing. Make these cocksucking mail order med spam companies call the DEA offices. How hilarious is that?
Haiku #51414, by Anonymous Poet
September 19, 2014 9:50 am ET

Just like King Elvis.
They will die taking a shit.
And I'll sell tickets.
Haiku #51412, by Anonymous Poet
September 19, 2014 1:57 am ET

And before they die
pour scalding coffee down them.
They'll shit out their lives.
Haiku #51411, by Anonymous Poet
September 19, 2014 1:55 am ET

Not but blind torsos.
Blind and deaf with charcoal stumps.
Then starve them to death.
Haiku #51410, by Anonymous Poet
September 19, 2014 1:54 am ET

Adrenaline shots
so they can't go into shock.
Gouge out both their eyes!
Haiku #51409, by Anonymous Poet
September 19, 2014 1:52 am ET

Get the blow torches!
Tie them down; burn off their limbs.
Inject them with meth.
Haiku #51408, by Anonymous Poet
September 19, 2014 1:51 am ET

Fucking douchy spam.
Faggot ass pill peddlers!
Flay them all alive!
Haiku #51407, by Anonymous Poet
September 19, 2014 1:44 am ET

Now there is no spam.
I can be a douche bag too.
"Sorry but" "Hello".
Haiku #51405, by FUCK YOU SPAMMERS!!!!! of up your ass
September 18, 2014 1:59 pm ET

chemistry is hard
hard like this damn chair on
buttermilk pancake
Haiku #51351, by Anonymous Poet
September 18, 2014 12:25 pm ET

I'll spell it backwards
noitcnufsyd elitcere
keep spammers away!
Haiku #51350, by Anonymous Poet
September 18, 2014 11:54 am ET

frothy water pic
google+ is such a waste
roast beef or turkey
Haiku #51349, by Anonymous Poet
September 18, 2014 11:52 am ET

falling rice bags kill
I need to go brush my teeth
yo momma so fat!
Haiku #51348, by Anonymous Poet
September 18, 2014 11:51 am ET

induced suicide
teen girls overusing like
struck with a tuna
Haiku #51347, by Anonymous Poet
September 18, 2014 11:50 am ET

only eight more now
it's universal conquest
or something like that
Haiku #51346, by Anonymous Poet
September 18, 2014 11:49 am ET

why are you laughing
does this then make you happy
eat a big booger
Haiku #51345, by Anonymous Poet
September 18, 2014 11:47 am ET

and in walks Jesus
where can I get some free beer
torture is not nice
Haiku #51344, by Anonymous Poet
September 18, 2014 11:46 am ET

I can't think of it
Bad Haiku: (necessary)
I do not know why
Haiku #51343, by Anonymous Poet
September 18, 2014 11:45 am ET

is there comedy
he's wearing a business suit
clowns are like boring
Haiku #51342, by Anonymous Poet
September 18, 2014 11:43 am ET

no it didn't work
so here is a new haiku
you are so welcome
Haiku #51341, by of
September 18, 2014 11:41 am ET

can I submit nil
lets see on the next haiku
well here goes nothing
Haiku #51340, by Anonymous Poet
September 18, 2014 11:40 am ET

I'm almost done now
the new novel will be bad
Do you like apples?
Haiku #51339, by Anonymous Poet
September 18, 2014 11:39 am ET

Japanimation
octopi orgasmic show
exploding lizard
Haiku #51338, by Anonymous Poet
September 18, 2014 11:38 am ET

all these stupid words
what does she think of when she
I don't think I should
Haiku #51337, by Anonymous Poet
September 18, 2014 11:37 am ET

Fuck fuck fuck! *Star Wars*
We can always start a war
the Dow Jones rises
Haiku #51336, by Anonymous Poet
September 18, 2014 11:35 am ET

where is the lobster
I don't think I can do this
Start Wars aliens
Haiku #51335, by Anonymous Poet
September 18, 2014 11:34 am ET