BAD HAIKU - Horrible poetry for the digital age
19 Years
231 Days
and
53984 Haikus
later...
Haiku #53984, by oyouopoo of USA
July 1, 2016 9:31 pm ET

Hello!
Haiku #53983, by wueoyppu of USA
July 1, 2016 7:06 am ET

If Jesus did it,
I know you can do it too.
We're better than God.

Funny thing is that
we likely taste better too.
Bland bread and cheap wine.

I should bring squirt cheese
and a fifth of Thunderbird.
The priest would just shit!

Holy improvement!
He's never tasted better!
... Father forgive me.
Haiku #53982, by df
July 1, 2016 3:14 am ET

Do not kill yourself.
That's an unforgiven sin.
Allow us to help.

We'll kill you instead.
Then we will cook and eat you.
You won't go to waste.

Fattened soft poets.
Juicier than Kobe beef.
Slow roasted all day.

Sizzling fat sounds.
The last whine you'll ever make.
The body and blood.
Haiku #53981, by df is in nead of you to die for his sins.
July 1, 2016 3:05 am ET

the novelty has
worn off but over time it
can become some fun
Haiku #53980, by vhs
June 30, 2016 12:39 pm ET

i'm going to whine
again, but not kill myself
this is irony
Haiku #53979, by vhs
June 30, 2016 12:30 pm ET

I burned a haiku.
I wrote it down and lit it.
It screamed horribly.
Haiku #53978, by df
June 30, 2016 3:49 am ET

I parked a booger.
Right upon the bathroom wall.
It was disgusting.

Though it's no surprise
that I then returned to find
many more boogers.

I counted seven.
It was a booger party.
Great minds think alike.

Haiku #53977, by df
June 30, 2016 3:45 am ET


This cannot be seen.
An invisible haiku.
The first of its kind.
Haiku #53976, by df
June 30, 2016 3:35 am ET

Why would I want that?
I do not want to be hard.
But my fat wife does.
Haiku #53975, by Darth Figpucker likes to make an ass of himself.
June 29, 2016 12:40 am ET


Draw from the Dark Side.
Take power from others' pain.
Drink the tears of "friends".

Their incompetence
allows for opportunity
to find replacements.

Buy a meat grinder.
Keep it well-oiled and clean.
Use them for sausage.

Why aren't there any
cannibalistic Sith Lords?
I guess I'm the first.
Haiku #53973, by df of feel the hate, it gives you power!.... I farted.
June 28, 2016 7:28 pm ET

Hello!
Haiku #53972, by prwwrtte of USA
June 28, 2016 12:58 pm ET

apoplexia
serveth no purposeth
swingeth a wide dick
Haiku #53971, by Lush
June 27, 2016 10:56 pm ET

may i submit joy
via jolly crapulence?
emasculate d(e)a[r]th
Haiku #53970, by Lush of interchangeable letters
June 27, 2016 10:54 pm ET

ill lamentation
and self annihilation
have enslaved BH
Haiku #53969, by Lush
June 27, 2016 10:49 pm ET

I feel not but shame.
To live on earth as human.
Better a tape worm.
Haiku #53968, by df
June 27, 2016 8:21 pm ET

Hunter shot himself
to avoid a painful death,
not 'cause of Nixon!

"People have got to know whether or not their president's a chicken fucker. Well, I'm not a chicken fucker!" -- Nixon
Haiku #53967, by df
June 27, 2016 3:38 pm ET

I made yo momma!
And then yo momma made you.
Luke, I'm yo daddy!

".... Aw, hell nawwwww!"
Haiku #53966, by df
June 27, 2016 3:33 pm ET

to the one who must
compare to the other when
hunter s. thompson

saw nixon die then
did he blow his mind out in a
space of his own then

enemies defined
by one another, the point
others do not make

us
Haiku #53965, by vhs
June 27, 2016 1:10 pm ET

Important Day - 04, July 2016 : Independence Day USA

All Quotes and Images site : Plusquotes.com
Haiku #53964, by PlusTeam of USA
June 27, 2016 10:44 am ET

FART!
Haiku #53963, by
June 26, 2016 10:58 pm ET

Incomplete sentence.
Self-referring poetry.
All merit voided.
Haiku #53962, by df
June 26, 2016 10:49 pm ET

Why can't we all die?
Earth would be a better place.
No strip malls in sight.
Haiku #53961, by df
June 26, 2016 10:45 pm ET

The vast ocean shore.
The crashing waves lullaby.
Singing to no one.
Haiku #53960, by df
June 26, 2016 10:45 pm ET

after all these years
greg has the touch
still suave as fuck
Haiku #53959, by justforSU of /r/stevenuniverse
June 26, 2016 9:36 pm ET

i miss gen x but
kurt cobain is dead and there's
a zeitgeist shift when

some voice passes on
others have to take their place
who will replace you?

Haiku #53958, by vhs
June 26, 2016 12:45 pm ET

ego likes to talk
it lacks insight then it dies
what else to say here
Haiku #53957, by vhs
June 26, 2016 12:43 pm ET


I am obnoxious.

That is an understatement.
Poetry is dumb.
Haiku #53956, by Darth Figpucker of The High Vogon Poetry Counsel
June 26, 2016 7:15 am ET

"Is she a squirter?"
Vaginal detonation,
what it should be called.
Haiku #53955, by df
June 26, 2016 6:53 am ET

Marital hindrance.
Double arrow insertion.
Fucking molecules!
Haiku #53954, by Darth Figpucker
June 26, 2016 6:51 am ET

Saturday night blues
It's not something I would choose
Can't even drink booze
Haiku #53953, by Anonymous Poet
June 26, 2016 2:33 am ET

I tried MMA
It did not go very well
Got my ass kicked bad
Haiku #53952, by Anonymous Poet
June 26, 2016 2:31 am ET

I need a jet pack.
But Amazon or Ebay?
What do you suggest?
Haiku #53951, by Darth Figpucker
June 26, 2016 1:50 am ET

Christ, you're a pussy.
A whiny little bitch-boy.
Go get a sex change.

On the other hand,
To expect more from poets,
That is just stupid.

To man the fuck up,
it is just not possible,
not for a poet.
Haiku #53950, by df
June 26, 2016 1:44 am ET

It is a wonderful information and also get good knowledge and ideas from this article. The author is giving good thoughts and suggestions to each and every readers through this article.The good advantages of this article is giving good thought to each and every readers and also it
Haiku #53949, by David of New York, NY
June 25, 2016 2:15 pm ET

one man takes over
a haiku website and ads
and i post here too
Haiku #53948, by vhs
June 25, 2016 1:41 pm ET

I have your child.
But that's the way life goes, Ace.
I'll name him Barrack.

Yours,
Amy
Haiku #53947, by Amy the Whore
June 24, 2016 9:08 pm ET

This is for a girl I slept with who didn't tell me she was dating my best friend. No one speaks to her anymore.

Amy, a raging whore.
Lying on back with legs spread.
You are not missed.
Haiku #53946, by Ace of Louisville KY
June 24, 2016 7:15 pm ET

Haiku #53945, by epyurrtw of USA
June 24, 2016 12:47 pm ET

Hello!
Haiku #53944, by uorptiwo of USA
June 24, 2016 9:57 am ET

Customers file in
Mop, stock, check, and sell crack pipes
Convenience store blues
Haiku #53943, by Partial Recall of USA
June 23, 2016 6:11 pm ET

This is a small font.
You can barely make it out.
Ha ha fucking ha.
Haiku #53942, by Darth Figpucker
June 23, 2016 6:40 am ET

My wife is too fat.
Some young stud take her from me.
I'll make it worth it.
Haiku #53941, by Darth Figpucker
June 23, 2016 6:36 am ET

So much work to do.
And see what I am doing.
I should be fired.
Haiku #53940, by Darth Figpucker
June 22, 2016 10:55 pm ET

Hello!
Haiku #53939, by ywiriiup of USA
June 21, 2016 9:11 pm ET

Vector curvature.
Unit tangent binormal.
huh huh; "binormal".

Yeah, yeah, that was cool.
Heh heh, and you said "unit".
Boi-oi-oi-oi-oinng!
Haiku #53938, by Beavis and Butthead
June 21, 2016 6:20 pm ET

measured charisma
engorged, targeted chasm
finessed curvature
Haiku #53937, by Lush
June 21, 2016 5:16 am ET

a past commander
penetrating hot targets
has my surrender
Haiku #53936, by Lush
June 21, 2016 5:08 am ET

Reciprocity
though quaint enough a concept
needn't apply here
Haiku #53935, by Lush
June 21, 2016 5:06 am ET