Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
27 Years, 167 Days and 77048 Haiku later...

By this time next year
I'm going to own the world.
All poets must leave.
Haiku # 52623, June 7, 2015 2:02 pm ET
by Darth Figpucker
Wild Saturday night
Sunday morning hangover
Must drink less next time
Haiku # 52622, June 7, 2015 12:10 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Victory is ours!
Pour forth your foggy musings
unburdened by spam
Haiku # 52621, June 7, 2015 2:17 am ET
by Eye no nutting
I do not know why
But i am bad at Haikus
Five syllable line
Haiku # 52620, June 7, 2015 2:01 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
There was a crack down.
Large spam bot servers shut off.
Or something like that.

I read it somewhere.
Does not mean that it is true.
Either way, I'm glad.

Back to bad haiku.
Farts, burps, and genital scabs.
Awful stuff like that.
Haiku # 52619, June 6, 2015 8:01 pm ET
by Darth Figpucker of the basement of Satan's outhouse.
haiku surges on
leaving spam bots floundering
and a write-full plaice
Haiku # 52618, June 6, 2015 7:41 am ET
by ash
Seriously, I
think that the spammers gave up.
Internet history?
Haiku # 52617, June 5, 2015 12:23 pm ET
by Janis
The old beggar scratched.
It was not done politely.
One would almost think.
Haiku # 52616, June 4, 2015 9:53 pm ET
by Darth Figpucker
The clock is ticking.
Nintendo seems to stop it.
Look in the mirror.
Haiku # 52615, June 4, 2015 2:01 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
There was a dead dog.
She poked it with a long stick.
Maggots slithered out.
Haiku # 52614, June 4, 2015 1:48 pm ET
by Darth Figpucker the Highly Inappropriate of my mother's basement
No spam to clean up?
Unfuckingbelievable
Boner pills for all!!!!
Haiku # 52613, June 3, 2015 1:31 pm ET
by Janis
Monkey's throwing poo.
Tourists get a souvenir.
Throwing poo looks fun.
Haiku # 52612, June 3, 2015 12:44 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Better a chat room
than a message board of spam.
Please buy my used car.

I'm a puffer fish.
Puffing wacky tobaccy.
But only sometimes.
Haiku # 52611, June 3, 2015 7:12 am ET
by www.darthfigpucker.com
Skiddle de bee bop
Doodle de tee top shoe shop
Wabba wee doop dip
Haiku # 52610, June 3, 2015 12:50 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Flat fish had a wish
to live free in the ocean,
not cooked on a dish
Haiku # 52609, June 3, 2015 12:45 am ET
by I gno nuff timg
Webdriver Torso:
Blue and red rectangles go
BEEP BOOP BLOP BEEP DOOP
Haiku # 52608, June 2, 2015 8:07 pm ET
by Flat the Fish of Atlantic Ocean
I am a flat fish
I live in the Atlantic
I write bad haiku
Haiku # 52607, June 2, 2015 7:46 pm ET
by Flat the Fish of Atlantic Ocean
Beware of the time
when some stupid idiot
makes this a chat room.
Haiku # 52606, June 2, 2015 7:45 pm ET
by Flat the Fish of The Atlantic Ocean
Haikus do not rhyme
'cept when they really need to
so violets are blue
Haiku # 52605, June 2, 2015 7:36 pm ET
by Flat the Fish of Atlantic Ocean
I will praise who wrote
that haiku 'bout Flat the Fish
and other flat stuff
Haiku # 52604, June 2, 2015 7:30 pm ET
by Flat the Fish of Atlantic Ocean
Many write Haikus
about a flat fish who writes
very bad haikus
Haiku # 52603, June 2, 2015 7:25 pm ET
by Flat the Fish of Atlantic Ocean
Lady Gaga's ass.
A fish that can write haiku.
A piece of paper.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Things that are flat.
Haiku # 52602, June 2, 2015 4:00 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Don't drink soda pop.
Mosquitoes love CO2.
And also sugar.
Haiku # 52601, June 2, 2015 3:56 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Tobacco junkies.
Brown-stained fingers and clothing.
Let us laugh at them.

How they suck Death's dick.
White tiny smoke-spewing cock.
And they pay for it.
Haiku # 52600, June 2, 2015 3:52 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Rednecks cooking meth.
Crackheads breaking into cars.
Children at the park.
Haiku # 52599, June 2, 2015 3:48 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
They are not nice men.
They ride loud motorcycles.
And they wear crosses.
Haiku # 52598, June 2, 2015 3:47 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
winter is too cold
seasons are over-rated
in my opinion
Haiku # 52597, June 2, 2015 12:49 am ET
by ash
Space Bar Space Bar Space
Bar Space Bar Space Bar Space Bar
Space Bar Space Bar Done
Haiku # 52596, June 1, 2015 8:57 pm ET
by Flat the Fish of Atlantic Ocean
I like to eat things
It could be my sofa or
perhaps a lawn gnome
Haiku # 52595, June 1, 2015 8:55 pm ET
by Flat the Fish of Atlantic Ocean
Dost thou even hoist?
To be honest with thy soul
*Sword chops off head* NAY
Haiku # 52594, June 1, 2015 8:53 pm ET
by Flat the Fish of Atlantic Ocean
Lines from some poems
Quoth the raven, nevermore
Ga ga ga ga ga
Haiku # 52593, June 1, 2015 8:50 pm ET
by Flat the Fish of Atlantic Ocean
Hot dogs versus fries
fries are way too thin to eat
but so are hot dogs
Haiku # 52592, June 1, 2015 8:49 pm ET
by Flat the fish of Atlantic Ocean
Haikus are so vague
The last verse never makes sense
I live in a box
Haiku # 52591, June 1, 2015 8:47 pm ET
by Flat the Fish of Atlantic Ocean
Google versus bing
Bing gives you no real results

Google takes over
Haiku # 52590, May 31, 2015 10:14 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Haiku: Pointless po-

em created to repre-

sent the world and - GAAAAAAH
Haiku # 52589, May 31, 2015 10:07 pm ET
by Bad student of Still failing Haiku school
Open your front door.
Poetry is meaningless.
Take a step forward.
Haiku # 52588, May 31, 2015 11:59 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Here there be no twat.
Only floppy penises,
flaccid and tiny.
Haiku # 52587, May 31, 2015 11:57 am ET
by R. R. Martin
I scanned my fat ass.
I put the pic on Facebook.
Now it is Assbook.
Haiku # 52586, May 31, 2015 8:51 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
I like to fuck things.
It could be rubber chickens.
Perhaps a lawn gnome.
Haiku # 52585, May 31, 2015 8:31 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
I like to steal things
It could be poetry or
perhaps a lawn gnome
Haiku # 52584, May 30, 2015 3:30 pm ET
by Eye know nut thing
Boredom settles in.
I need to steal something.
Perhaps a lawn gnome.
Haiku # 52583, May 29, 2015 5:42 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
I truly hate God.
God made man, man made haiku.
Therefore I hate God.
Haiku # 52581, May 28, 2015 5:21 pm ET
by Hail Satan!
Overinflated
Kanye. Underinflated
footballs. Balance sought
Haiku # 52580, May 28, 2015 1:41 pm ET
by Rigsby K. of Texas
He tried to catch fish.
You might ask why he did this.
For the halibut.
Haiku # 52579, May 28, 2015 2:12 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Jerry is not dead.
He's hanging out with Elvis.
In Cabo Wabo.
Haiku # 52578, May 27, 2015 8:19 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
The worth of my birth.
The universe is now worse.
That's the 2nd Law.
Haiku # 52577, May 27, 2015 5:40 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet of of above love dove glove
New Grateful Dead tour.
Jerry's corpse made a puppet.
It sounds much better.
Haiku # 52576, May 27, 2015 5:36 pm ET
by Darth Figpucker, of course!
Goats climbing tall trees.
Captchas on a mailbox.
Razor blades in soap.
Haiku # 52575, May 27, 2015 5:35 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Poison Ivy pus.
Crusty bloody underwear.
Swollen painful dick.
Haiku # 52574, May 27, 2015 5:29 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
These words of wisdom.
Say "Horsey Teepee Soupey".
But stand on your head.
Haiku # 52573, May 27, 2015 5:27 pm ET
by Kindergarten Mantra Recitation Ball of Not at the park, dammit.
< 50 Less Recent Haiku 50 More Recent Haiku >