Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
27 Years, 183 Days and 77093 Haiku later...

Don't need no raise or
title Mr. Boss Man, just
them lime Otter Pops
Haiku # 32626, September 9, 2005 4:24 pm ET
by onjaysun of frogtown
i'm sick of coughing
but unless i stop breathing
it's more of the same
Haiku # 32625, September 9, 2005 9:29 am ET
by ash
I don't have a house
Next year I shall be homeless
But still a student
Haiku # 32624, September 8, 2005 5:55 pm ET
by A Student of Housing adverts
Kinda hits you like
a coconut to the head,
Gilligan be dead
Haiku # 32623, September 7, 2005 2:18 pm ET
by onjaysun of frogtown (miss ya little buddy)
Let's make fossil fuel
from some old admin fossils...
no gas shortage then.
Haiku # 32622, September 7, 2005 7:26 am ET
by Out of Gas Driver
Wanna fill me up,
for a fill-up, Phillip? The
Gas "Ho-in" begins
Haiku # 32621, September 6, 2005 3:48 pm ET
by onjaysun of frogtown
Johann Santana
One two three strikes you are out
That Beaner can pitch
Haiku # 32620, September 5, 2005 10:54 pm ET
by the monkey butler of Pittsburgh
bound to be shaken
no doctor no doctor no
take pussy galore
Haiku # 32619, September 5, 2005 2:42 am ET
by mellie
get shaken and stirred
beware of complex bondage
whilst being rogered
Haiku # 32618, September 5, 2005 1:51 am ET
by ash
Roger Moore may hide
inside the Kornflake box of
Konnery-but-Less
Haiku # 32617, September 4, 2005 5:47 pm ET
by Kornflake haiku revision from Klover
my boobs hurt... somewhere
it must be my period ~
Ghost of Hormone past [.]
Haiku # 32616, September 4, 2005 5:41 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Roger Moore made hide
inside the Kornflake box called:
Konnery-but-Less
Haiku # 32615, September 4, 2005 4:42 pm ET
by Klover of the o.c.
Beware applying
phenomenological
approaches in God
Haiku # 32614, September 4, 2005 1:37 pm ET
by Mort of Paris
Get back to the house
Let in by someone who should
Not be at home now
Haiku # 32612, September 4, 2005 10:09 am ET
by A Student of She said she was going to the Peak district
Wake up on a train
Why am I in Huddersfield?
I should be in Hull
Haiku # 32611, September 4, 2005 10:06 am ET
by A Student of Alcohol
new orleans ? yo, george !
as successful as iraq
but closer to home
Haiku # 32610, September 4, 2005 6:23 am ET
by ash
lymphomania
some say it's a gland problem
when cancer fucks you
Haiku # 32609, September 4, 2005 6:20 am ET
by ash
zero tolerance
three strikes and you are out Bush
shame shame shame end game
Haiku # 32608, September 4, 2005 3:46 am ET
by mellie
No, I'm not a heff-a-lump
Haiku # 32607, September 4, 2005 12:18 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Big ole heff-a-lump
Double bubble butt and chin.
Fatty fatty fuck.
Haiku # 32606, September 4, 2005 12:17 am ET
by heffa
Mina and Sunsi
The root of all that is wrong
With indoor plumbing
Haiku # 32605, September 4, 2005 12:16 am ET
by gotha_girl
Bald-ass, hairless fuck.
Chemo lovin' motha fuck.
Cancer is a bitch
Haiku # 32604, September 4, 2005 12:15 am ET
by lympho
I eat library paste
My cat's breath smells like cat food
Ralph Wiggum is God
Haiku # 32603, September 4, 2005 12:15 am ET
by Mina
Second Wind Fitness
Can Suck My Tiny white Dick
Save money my ass!
Haiku # 32602, September 4, 2005 12:12 am ET
by El Hefe
Awoke with a bone
Makes my pee-pee spray crooked.
Life is such a Bitch!
Haiku # 32601, September 4, 2005 12:10 am ET
by Gaffa_girl
She has to rewrite
Technology not her strength
Get the abacus
Haiku # 32600, September 4, 2005 12:10 am ET
by Joe Sixpack, Sr
Damn that chick of mine
Forces me to Perkins now
Coffee and french fries
Haiku # 32599, September 4, 2005 12:08 am ET
by Bob, the other white meat
Oh Digital God
Binary Lover of all Men
Super Cyber Sex
Haiku # 32598, September 4, 2005 12:06 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
a resurection
with no mary to wake me
bad haiku resumed
Haiku # 32597, September 3, 2005 4:58 pm ET
by ap of US
fuck you mcdonald's
salads dont come in a cup, damn
your dollar menu
Haiku # 32596, September 3, 2005 2:51 pm ET
by =) of Anywhere Usa
superdome nightmare
woke up to man on my roof
high pressure cleaning
Haiku # 32595, September 3, 2005 1:12 am ET
by mellie
People that work in
Highway reststops hate clean teeth
They like spacious rot
Haiku # 32594, September 2, 2005 10:26 pm ET
by Kackarott of somewhere in in Wisconsin
Haiku # 32593, September 2, 2005 9:25 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
think your job sucks, try
working at the New Orleans
Board of Tourism
Haiku # 32592, September 2, 2005 12:18 pm ET
by onjaysun of frogtown
hey ho uncle judd
it's no treat on bourbon street
mississippi blood
Haiku # 32591, September 2, 2005 10:01 am ET
by ash
surprise ! shock and awe !
who thought you could offer more ?
george, get off the floor

Haiku # 32590, September 2, 2005 9:40 am ET
by ash
wake up you dreamers
morning mr. president
it's time you were gone
Haiku # 32589, September 2, 2005 9:23 am ET
by ash
down at the levee
moreso than ever before
subversive nature
Haiku # 32588, September 2, 2005 9:22 am ET
by ash
Mississippi mud
is not a dessert this year
the gulf is just gone

Haiku # 32587, September 2, 2005 7:44 am ET
by theunseenundine
drowning in tears
beloved new orleans
we not be jazzin'
Haiku # 32586, September 2, 2005 12:09 am ET
by mellie
"Horse Sense"


If it wasn't for
my horse, I wouldn't of spent
that year in college


-- thanks to comedian Lewis Black for the inspiration for this haiku
Haiku # 32585, September 1, 2005 3:27 pm ET
by Crimson Mind -- "Horse Sense" of Phoenix, AZ

Concede consensus
Condescend cerulean
Cradled consciousness
Haiku # 32584, September 1, 2005 3:23 pm ET
by Crimson Mind -- "Untitled" of Phoenix, AZ
"Etiolate"


He had a pale face
etiolated from years
in dank, dark pool halls
Haiku # 32583, September 1, 2005 3:17 pm ET
by Crimson Mind -- "Etiolate" of Phoenix, AZ
"Stogy"


Poker with the boys.
Smelling like a bad stogy
Broke, I hitchhike home.
Haiku # 32582, September 1, 2005 3:14 pm ET
by Crimson Mind -- "Stogy" of Phoenix, AZ
"Incompetence"


Incompetence is
a level of Management
to which he aspires


-- inspired by Haiku #32577, by Bablets
Haiku # 32581, September 1, 2005 3:10 pm ET
by Crimson Mind -- "Incompetence"
tried to buy normal
waffle maker at Target,
Damn you, Belgiumites!
Haiku # 32580, September 1, 2005 12:44 pm ET
by onjaysun of frogtown
had to google "Girl"
to find out she's "sun-eyed", please
e-nun-c-8 Beck
Haiku # 32579, September 1, 2005 12:32 pm ET
by onjaysun of frogtown
"Call me Loretta,
call me what you will"..No? My
bad, Mr. Seger
Haiku # 32578, September 1, 2005 12:28 pm ET
by onjaysun of frogtown
incompetence is
a particular disease
that I suffer from
Haiku # 32577, August 31, 2005 2:51 pm ET
by Bablets
if I could type this
faster than the speed of light
I would but I can't
Haiku # 32576, August 31, 2005 2:49 pm ET
by Bablets of Fursville
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