My angel Ashley
Is mine in every way
Yet, stolen from me

Quoteth Moe Szyslak:
"Tatum'll fustigate 'im!"
verb, beat with a club

What is a Ukraine?
Whatever is a Black sea coast?
Odessa? soda water?

The Creationists
are the stupidest people
that ever evolved.

Could it be Australians?
Self admitted Haiku nerds
Tempting us to ask

who is more stupid
me for writing this haiku
or you for reading

infecting the world
like the hiv virus
dumb repetition

If stupidity
Equals violence then US
How many gun deaths

On this Earth of ours
Who are the stupidest?
People of us all

For Americans!
Odessa is in Ukraine
On the Black sea coast

75 % of
All teenagers tested in
Odessa has HIV

Our surfers are tough
Surf in winter when it snows
Howling gales as well

He surfs off Scily
Silly sharks and Englishmen
Basking in coldness

No, he didn't surf
Katsushika Hokusai
These things go in waves

A circle of jerks
Engaged in a daisy chain
Crass pollination

Mouth over cat

Starting to wake up,
I yawn, stretch and scratch my nuts.
Shit! It

I hang upside down,
let the tar drain from my lungs.
I smoke far too much.

My coffee is cold.
I microwave it again.
My coffee is warm.

I lay on the bed
and float up to the ceiling.
It

How

We just had coffee
I am still in love with her
Miss my ex lover

Our sea

Teetering madness
I just ignore my problems
Hope they go away

How was I to know?
It

streams of consciousness
strange tangential communions
contagious madness

i write about surf
using the vernacular
and you chuck that up

Call to God

i was fully sick
that looked awesome she told me
scorching right hander

Just wait it

How am I doing?
My life, all that it could be?
Is there more than this?

I spin on one foot
Just looking for a way out
It

Memorable haiku.
No! Funny absolutely.
And sometimes profound.

Defenestration.
A window onto the world,
Literally. Splat!

This dyslexia
It no is matter laughing
Cure for be can found

Semaphore haiku
\./ _./ \. ._ - "Five more! Seven more! Five more!"
\ /
Aerobic meter

Listen up Cheney
The phrase is 'The buck stops here'
_Not: 'The buckshot's here'

parthenogenic
Like Christ and 'Whip-Tail Lizards'
Both clones of their mom

See Dick. See Dick hunt.
Quail not duck. Duck harry duck
He didn't duck, Dick.

Life is no more than
a sexually transmitted,
terminal disease.
>
Raw flesh exposed weeps,
the loins stabbed and injected
with life

Stiff opposition
in the ring: one submission,
one throbbing sphincter.

dyslexic poet
you know it's the thought that counts
and thus you fcuk up

Lacking social skills
I grab her arse and fondle
Speak obscenities

Wot you lookin' at?
You got a fuckin

Sitting on the shelf,
now comes crashing to the floor,
Humpty-Cookie-Jar.

Hunting catapult,
baby mice ammunition.
A red splattered wall.

birdy flew -- boom -- missed
friend peppered ironically
V.P. -- what a dick!

No Dude, I'm Laughing.
Of Course It Is,"Bad Haiku".
You Are The New King

Dude, I laugh
All your base
Are belong to us

Did Doc Severinson
perform some amputations
before conducting?