Pooping gives me joy.
Like have a yard sale.
You get rid of shit.
by Darth Figpucker
You did what I said.
You followed my instructions.
Congratulations.
by Anonymous Poet
will this even work
a grand experiment
html tags
by akdsd
Death to all numbers.
Obliterate them to nil.
Smash them to zero.
Interdimensional aliens have explained in great detail to me that we must learn to do math without numbers, without counting, else we are doomed to annihilation by God and once we learn this glorious holy communication with nature and the cosmos then we will assure our immortality and place by his side. The turtles had learned it, but have since forgotten. This was in the days before the last great extinction. Dinosaurs could count. Are we no better than they?
The tortoise and the hare. We must eat hasenpfeffer. Slow down.
You understand, don't you?
by Anonymous Poet
Counting is not good.
In fact it is downright bad.
You should never count.
by Anonymous Poet
Repeat repeating
is the weakest Of the weak
So there there there there
by Oingo Dingo
repeating is weak.
i don't believe that at all.
repeating is weak.
by Anonymous Poet
That was lazier
Than your old man in the sack
Repeating is weak
by Anonymous Poet
My pearl necklace.
For your wife or your girlfriend.
Oink, oink, squee, squee, snort.
by Mandingle Eberry
My pearls before swine
you electronic hoodlums
step up, have at 'em
by Mandingo Ebola
San Diego Surf
is too cold. When I surf nude
I only hang two.
by Anonymous Poet
Six brand new haiku
In less than sixty minutes
You must be on meth
by Aunt Bea of Mayberry
Intimidating??
Dog the bounty hunter has
That short man's syndrome
Defy gravity
Know what I'm talking about?
They're from the same show
by Jeff Brenner of California
Near San Diego
San Onofre power plant
It's Dolly Parton!
Surfed at the nude beach
The terms "longboard" and "hang ten"
Now mean something new
Nude volleyball game
Oddly disgusting to watch
Ball handling error!
by Jeff Brenner of California
Soon after tacos
The cilantro took effect
And oh did it burn
by Jeff Brenner of California
I would like to ask
Enrique Iglesias
"Where did that mole go??"
by Jeff Brenner of California
Self-lubricating
The Spam shot through my bowels
Like cheese through a goose
by Jeff Brenner of California
I ate too much Spam
And all I have to show is
A spastic colon
by Jeff Brenner of California
You must be honest.
Who here wouldn't fuck Samwell?
What what in the butt!
by Anonymous Poet
humperificous unanimous
bootylicious delicious booty
eatin' that big bouncy ass.
Who eats Bouncy Beyonce's ass???
I mean, that's just nasty.
But nowhere near as low
as reading haiku.
by Anonymous Poet
Numbers are stupid.
Like who needs them anyway.
Testicles: one, two.
by Anonymous Poet
Viagra is good
Viagra Man Viagra man good
Harder and harder
by Viagra Man and BADASS PIMPTRON of THE ROTATING BED IN MY FRIDGE
There are no poems.
There's only reality.
And this is neither.
by Anonymous Poet
A vid addition
renders any erection
super duper hard
if it's porn, that is.
Oh, those silly Japanese.
You gotta love 'em.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
And now for our porn.
Porn made in the USA.
Why the world loves us:
This is really sick.
Disturbing, twisted, vile.
UK porn's the worst.
Enough porn for now.
Tomorrow I'll link to the
Monkey rapes a goat.
(Music vid on Youtube.)
And I will use autostart.
Fuck, I hate counting.
by Anonymous Poet
stupid free verse, no matter how stupendous, is not terse and, thus not haiku. stifle your moronism, blast the schism, and adhere, whilst here, to the sole prescription, the maledictiuon... three lines, and a count... those syllables amount to some pierced viscount's notion of fluid emotion. Oh shit... violation.
Who the fuck cares. My final semblance caters to embolism... dizziness ... ajf8r4ies
by Lush
a gif addition
renders any rendition
super duper lame
by Lush of check
Nuclear-powered masturbatory reflexivity elongation enhancement.
That's right, white boy, now you too can make them scream.
Get it now while supplies last. Satisfy your wife and 6 mistresses tonight with your glow-in-the-dark swollen spongy tissue. H.R. Geiger counter Alien meat on rye.
Thank you Canadian Wal-mart.com
I would like Viagra Spam if they would just be creative about it, but oh no, that's just too much to ask.
by Anonymous Poet
Today's Haiku is
Brought to you by the letter
'Q' and number Pi
by Crimson Mind of Phoenix, AZ
Taco bell poem!
That is too too too funny.
Like a lot lot lot.
by Anonymous Poet
Taco Bell poems
Would recycle the same words
Over and over
by Anonymous Poet
I don't like counting.
And that includes syllables.
So why am I here?
This is robot work.
Robots writing poetry.
What a great concept.
Welcome to McD's
Here's a McPoem for you.
You want fries with that?
by William Blakespear's evil clone
"Tiger not sexy!
Dangerous to go in cage!"
They yell as I run....
by Mandingo Ebola
sixty-nine sixty-nine cool
sixty-nine sexy-nine cool cool cool
6969 wow
by Bored Poet of Room 2
WHY oh Why must I
Sit next to Dick, tell me why
why why tell me why
by BAD ASS PIMPTRON of YOUR PARTNERS BED
Some gays like mousing.
Yet I prefer badgering.
Oh, those poor badgers.
by Offensive novel of Geek Love, Snuff, Transmetropolitan
No freedom is good.
It makes you want to smash them.
And bring about change.
We all hate lawyers.
Even lawyers hate lawyers.
But we elect them.
We chose those we hate.
And we let them run our lives.
Sort of like marriage.
by Darth Figpucker of Plotting the doom of the City Planning Board... Effing road construction everywhere... damn govt.!
The Government is
a piece of shit first they
try and block torrents
What a bore whats next?
No free internet porn or music
Sharers I can't think of worse
by Concerned internet user
yet still oh still oh
I make this for you dear reader
Still oh still I write
by BAD ASS PIMPTRON of YOUR PARTNERS BED
Poetry oh poetry
Why do I care, oh wait, LOL
I don't give a shit
by BAD ASS PIMPTRON of MY PIMP PAD
There was a hot chick.
I stared at her boobs all day.
She slapped me for it.
by Boob Starer
Dick farts ARE awesome.
Catheter bubbles make farts.
And it feels good too.
I made a dick fart.
But it was only one time.
Oh, fond memories
by Darth Figpucker The Highly Inappropriate
#YOLOSWAG
SECRETLY WE R GAY
YOU AN ME AND U
by DICK FARTS ARE AWESOME of A school more commonly known as SHIVINGTON
Just cause I'm bored
I Write this for you and me
Go fuck yourself now
by BAD ASS PIMPTRON
Wait just a minute!
So "iamback" is censored.
However I'm not?!
That's just insulting!
I should be roasted alive.
And then fed to pigs.
All my poems burned.
Then put in jars of acid.
Never read again.
by Darth Figpucker the Highly Inappropriate of On a Vogon Ship, giving lessons on bad poetry.
This site is worthless.
Hard-on pills and gross haiku.
Where's the poems at?
No moderator.
Has the website owner died?
Or she just don't care.
I ain't seen no art.
Ain't none on this here website.
Just bad comedy.
by Redneck Samurai
He is pure nasty.
Consumed by the nasty side.
More douche than a man.
by Anonymous Poet
I liked you at first,
but I see your nasty side.
Thus I must move on.
by Anonymous Poet
You came here for fun???
Or as you say, "enjoyment"???
What is wrong with you?!?!
by Bad Vogon Poetry of Don't forget your towell.
