marketing slogan:
tired of the same old shit?
try fecal transplants!
by scotch of but maintain social distancing
So you think I should
get a fecal transplant to
fix my excrement.
Please be the donor.
I want feces just like yours.
Your shit doesnt' stink.
by Darth Whorrendouns, Dork Lard of the Fifth (of Rum) of Hell's got nothing on where I am now.
that's ok...sometimes we
need the Darwin Awards for
the human lemmings
by vhs
Corona thanks to
Chinese Communist Party...
But lemmings don't know.
by A World of Dead Lemmings
One World of Haiku:
Let us all sing Kumbaya
and hate on Donald.
by Virtue-Signalers of Burning Hell
A new haiku born:
Dork Lard is mentally ill
(Excrementally)
by Evaluation of Excremental Health
i am attempting
to get people to come here and
post some haikus.
by vhs
oh darkwing duck let's
get dangerous, suck gas you
evil doers, poit!
by vhs of better watch out you bad boys
New name. Let me guess:
It is now "Darth Whorrendous"
Did I get it right?
by Divine Workshop of Dirty Water
I don't write every poem on here, you know... I didn't say anything about quitting. Hang on until the end, old friend.
And I'm not a figpucker any more, so it's dw.
Separated!... Which makes me think maybe there is a God that cares. In some weird, twisted way. ;-)
Given the way this last year has turned out, I am 100% convinced that God has a FAR more warped sense of humor than I do. You win, God! You hear me! You beat me hand down! I cannot even imagine shit like that! You are the Master!
by dw
It's a cross between
the Sand People and Jawas.
You're a Star Wars fan!
by Darth Whorrendous, Dork Lard of the Fifth (of Rum) of Let's BBQ some Sand Jawas. Juicy and nutritious!
Those SJWS:
REND THEIR FOUL LIMBS ASUNDER.
Burn their Maoist texts.
by But Love Them as Yourself of course . . .
i wish i could quit
df, but i seek revenge
on those sjws
by Anonymous Poet
Oh ye heavens! Lord
Have mercy upon this land
For such bad poems.
by Current Crisis of Poetry
i have thought of say
i wish the internet would
go away for a bit
by vhs
If you were to leave,
We would weep and then vomit
Pure haiku sorrow.
by Until the Next Haiku
hmm, if i left the
website like i want to leave
twitter whats next then
by vhs
This is terrible.
I'm running out of puppies.
Didn't think it through.
by dw, the fartist formerly known as df
Abandon all hope!
Your puppies belong to me!
Purina cat chow!
I play puppy skeet.
Launch them with a puppypult.
Blast with a 4-gauge.
A puppypult is
a catapult that launches
puppies and not cats.
I play this game in
international waters.
Your laws can't touch me.
by Darth Whorrendous, The Dork Lard of the Fifth (of rum) so powerful you'll nevrer forget his stench. of My yacht in the Florida Keys, with prostytoots and 2 year supply of food, water, alcohol, and drugs. Seriously!
what puppies? he best
worry about puppies busting
a nut in his ass.
by vhs
Don't cry Haiku bitch.
We will protect your puppies
from Dork Lard filth-face.
by Dork Would Eat Unborn Puppies If It Could
i am very dis
appointed here so now
i am haiku bitch
by vhs
It is too bad cause
people think they''re right when they're
wrong and we move on
by vhs
i was blocked on say
twitter and someone was set
in their own hellbound
occult ways, they will
listen if and when they are ready
to talk to me here
by vhs of do what thou will is the first path to Hell
maybe some find that red
pill, that lovely cure for the
psychic version of
covid 19, but the
disease of social justice
murder-suicide
by vhs
TDS is not
curable, the people who
have it have to find
something else to
bitch about till they kill them
selves or go away
by vhs
lmao...hey
what a haiku, i am getting
good at b movies.
by vhs
i think we think we
can give a good show till some
person blows you off
by vhs
something about some
thing or another something
someone somewhere...how
by vhs
shrugs...MAGA
2020, death to "the Left"
yay, wave a flag.
by vhs
Talk bad about Trump,
But he's got a perty mouth.
Squeel little pig.
by Darth Relapse of My name is Darth, and I'm a swine addict. It's been 3 days since I last boinked a pig. "Welcome Darth".
Gordon Ramsey's new
avocado haiku pie
God that's fucking good!
by Darth Something or Other I Can't Decide Yet of It's not easy being a Dork Lard of the Pith.
Bring Trump into it?
He's the president. I'd say
You're more the moron.
by Trump Derangement Syndrome of Find A Cure SOON
trump is a moron
mr t says how it is
"pity the poor fools"
by ash
iamback is back
and as forward as ever
come blow me... a kiss
by ash
I like Whorrendous.
After all, I am a whore,
doing math homework.
And whores aren't so bad.
Better than cheap gold-diggers,
lying about love.
by Hey, at least my lies are obvious and therefore not much of a lie. Know what I mean?
Hey vhs, you might check out the book Rabbi Jesus by Bruce Chilton. I found it to be very insprirational. It made me feel like that was a Jesus I could respect. Give it a try if you ever get into a book store after this damn lock down. Hope you ALL stay virus free. Especially iamback.. I mean, I really like that guy!
by Darth Tootsalot... I gotta come up with someting better. of Darth... Whorrendous / Debauchus / Apathos / Vulgaro / Pervaricator (play on prevaricator, which means liar)
You don't have much faith
if a haiku destroys it.
"Lack of," "Disturbing."
by Darth Tootsalot, the Dork Lard (whale penis blubber) of I find your lack of syllables disturbing.
"Moral bankruptcy"?
You should think of it more like
"immoral richness".
by Darth Tootsalot of As rich as the stains in my underwear -- plant a garden in there, you could!
i was wondering
when you were going to post
your faith destroying
and evil haikus
for all to see your total
moral bankruptcy
by vhs
who's jack? the guy who
runs twitter? he got more than
lucky, he got rich.
by vhs of go twitter yourself
Wuhan virus jail
The whole damn Country- lock down.
But convicts get turned loose.
by Stir crazy of locked in
A soft rain of leaves
Rippling through the bamboo grove.
Think I'm going to puke.
by Nausea of Haiku
Nippress and Ash, many moons ago
got married in a gay Star Wars themed wedding as Darth Gaydar and Storm Pooper. How speshul a day it was with Jan-Ass the Hutt. I hope they have little baby Jawas and lots of dogs and cats
by iamback of guess
if you got lucky
but you didn't know you did
then well..jack, you're dead!
by scotch of https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1NAUeL0D4SI
the big thing is
we get lucky somtimes and
don't realize how lucky
by vhs
the big question is
when does it all end and when
does it all begin?
by vhs
Oh i'm just like yeah
I'm all like whatever dude
People be like: NO.
by Mikhail Bakhtin of Heteroglossic Disjunctures
God already knows
That the nation won't repent.
He hardened Pharaoh. . .
by So What's the Point of it All?
working remotely
with a bored, stir crazy kid
and my monkey mind
by scotch of nice day out though