Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
27 Years, 135 Days and 76969 Haiku later...

Oh my God, donuts!
How did you know I wanted...
Never mind, who cares.
Haiku # 70768, June 24, 2021 2:01 am ET
by Homer Simpson of Glowing with happiness
I gots to tell y'all:
Issallabout tha HAIKU.
We rollin' wit dat.
Haiku # 70767, June 23, 2021 10:11 pm ET
by Worthy Oriental Gentleman of Cathay
Why Dogs Fart So Much
( how YOU can help your buddy)
By the author of:
Haiku # 70766, June 23, 2021 12:52 pm ET
by No More Pussyfarts of New York Times Bestseller List
Sounds like those nightmares
Where your man-parts get severed
But then you wake up
Haiku # 70765, June 21, 2021 9:43 pm ET
by Celestial Guidance of DREAMS
Man painted his dink
Looked like a bearded dragon
Walked it on a leash
Haiku # 70764, June 21, 2021 2:06 pm ET
by Special Report of Philippines
The new arrivals
Cemeterily speaking:
Recent departures.
Haiku # 70762, June 20, 2021 11:54 am ET
by Death as an Airport
Hey cyrillic dolt:
We can't even read your trash.
Go spam elsewhere, fool.
Haiku # 70761, June 19, 2021 7:04 pm ET
by Vladimir Poot of Evil Russkies
Please knock firm but soft....
Because everybody likes
Those soft firm knockers
Haiku # 70759, June 18, 2021 10:37 pm ET
by Grown man making boobie jokes of Wasting my time and yours
Unexpected guest
Seventeen firm sexy knocks
I knew it was Darth
Haiku # 70758, June 17, 2021 9:27 pm ET
by It's open of Come on in
During the summer
the family enjoys fresh corn...

(Announcer, smiling)

Outhouse Gathering
Who lays claim to which rich manure?
They wipe with corn cobs
Haiku # 70757, June 17, 2021 5:38 pm ET
by Colonel Cornelius Brown of Corner of Front and Center streets (just past the Old Willow exit)
More Risky Business
Darth sliding in his undies
Old Time Rock and Roll
Haiku # 70756, June 17, 2021 4:36 pm ET
by Poopstain of Visible
Moet and Chandon,
Veuve Clicquot, Dom Perignon,
All low-brow brands. Pop.
Haiku # 70755, June 17, 2021 3:12 pm ET
by Monsieur Clicquot of Fizzy Bubbles
Stoof and moieties.
The beast lurks around the bend.
Inventing new facts.
Haiku # 70754, June 15, 2021 10:54 pm ET
by Lawyer of McGraw Hill Publishing.
Stoof and moieties.
The beast lurks around the bend.
Inventing new facts.
Haiku # 70753, June 15, 2021 10:51 pm ET
by Lawyer of McGraw Hill Publishing.
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Regards, LolitaTaw4466
Haiku # 70752, June 15, 2021 5:53 pm ET
by LolityTaw5616 of Russia
russian bots really
actually are on here zo
haiku moscow mule?
Haiku # 70750, June 15, 2021 2:33 pm ET
by moxie
Chimay, or may not...
it depends on what they've got
in Belgian bottle.
Haiku # 70749, June 15, 2021 8:51 am ET
by Pere de l'Abee of SHNOCKERED
Heard he ran away
and joined a monastery
One that makes fine cheese
Haiku # 70748, June 14, 2021 9:38 pm ET
by Town Crier of Under Old Willow
Misdiagnosis
You're not constipated, Darth.
Just filled with poems
Haiku # 70747, June 14, 2021 6:42 am ET
by I'm not really a doctor of Just wanted to see you naked
This job is the shits
Caught him doing number two
Stuffing the drain up
Haiku # 70746, June 12, 2021 8:53 pm ET
by Disgruntled Employee of Men's Room ( Out of Order)
I think I know him
Yeah, he disrobes completely
Stands on the fixture
Haiku # 70745, June 12, 2021 8:51 pm ET
by Third Eye of Janitor's forehead
Naked with long hair
Man pees into bathroom sink
Arbys Restaurant
Haiku # 70744, June 12, 2021 8:28 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
fuck my government
i'd call them a piece of shit
but that demeans shit
Haiku # 70743, June 12, 2021 9:55 am ET
by ash
Almost out of breath
Running to the cheeseburger
Feel my soft warm buns
Haiku # 70742, June 11, 2021 2:30 pm ET
by Fast Foodie of First Place
Not-so-great Reset:
Dead souls and zombies get chipped
and then Christ returns
Haiku # 70741, June 10, 2021 5:07 pm ET
by Ah Knowed It of Jeezus Showed It
That pop-god Jacko:
Squealing, chirping, moonwalking,
Flinging his forelock...
Haiku # 70740, June 8, 2021 10:02 am ET
by Latoyah of Gary Coleman
Great pop-god Jacko:
Squealing, chirping, moonwalking,
Flinging that forelock...
Haiku # 70739, June 8, 2021 9:15 am ET
by LaToyah of Gary Coleman
That last haiku poem
hung in the air like a fart
from beyond the grave
Haiku # 70737, June 7, 2021 3:29 am ET
by Noticer of Details of Up in this Mafk
Your cold rigid corpse
Face in a stupid grimace:
My greatest haiku.
Haiku # 70735, June 4, 2021 1:05 pm ET
by Rictus Erectus of Misanthropia
Can deer smell ozone?
Why does the rain smell like fish?
What does Space smell like?
Haiku # 70732, June 3, 2021 2:40 am ET
by Waiting for Darth of Under Old Willow
The Bad Haiku gland
is located up your ass
around the corner
Haiku # 70731, June 1, 2021 2:08 am ET
by Stimulating of H-spot
Sid the Sloth is hot.
How can you not get turned on?
That furry hot ass!
Haiku # 70730, May 30, 2021 10:15 pm ET
by That squirell's kind of cute too.
Ice Age 1 and 2
were not bad. Quite Amusing.
But after that, no.
Haiku # 70729, May 30, 2021 6:05 pm ET
by sid the sloth of San Diego
He watched her walk by
from the barber shop window.
What a set of gams!
Haiku # 70727, May 30, 2021 3:01 am ET
by Drunk on blue comb fluid of Barber Shop
Go to SuperCuts
Ask them for a butthole trim
Or get that shit waxed
Haiku # 70726, May 30, 2021 12:56 am ET
by Helping hand
17 feet tall
Programmed to cut the cheese
Here comes Limburger
Haiku # 70725, May 29, 2021 1:48 am ET
by 17 ft of In no rush
Not programmed to lie
But had to check NOT A ROBOT
May have blown a fuse
Haiku # 70724, May 29, 2021 12:28 am ET
by 17 of Look up
17 feet tall
You won’t mistake me for him
By him I mean Darth
Haiku # 70723, May 29, 2021 12:25 am ET
by 17 Foot Poet of Old Willow Robotics, Inc
Human like robot
Go ahead, Press the button.
Cup hands, inhale fart.
Haiku # 70722, May 28, 2021 11:39 pm ET
by Smells like WD-40 of Ball bearing burrito stand
That’s what you get when
you line the cage with bad haiku.
Cassowary Bird!
Haiku # 70721, May 28, 2021 11:22 pm ET
by Cassowary #1 of Cassowary Lane
I bought a parrot.
But it died when I got home.
Deceased. No more. Dead.
Haiku # 70720, May 27, 2021 9:09 pm ET
by It is an X-Parrot of "No, it's just resting."
Barbara Streisand.
Her nose has magic powers.
Boogers are diamonds.
Haiku # 70719, May 27, 2021 1:08 pm ET
by No, I am not Matt Stone or Trey Parker of But I can dream.
Go buy a parrot.
Teach it to say vulgar things.
Give it to a zoo.
Haiku # 70718, May 27, 2021 1:03 pm ET
by Or release it back to the wild so it can teach the other parrots.
You want to see Greeks?
A caged death match with Yanni?
Want to smash plates, too?
Haiku # 70717, May 27, 2021 2:31 am ET
by A. Cropolis of Now
I want to see geeks.
Caged death match with a chicken.
Take the kids to watch.
Haiku # 70716, May 27, 2021 2:08 am ET
by Wholesome family fun. of So what if he's naked.
Yessah. Finestkind.
Them lobstahs taste wicked good.
Penobscot. Ayuh.
Haiku # 70714, May 26, 2021 3:37 pm ET
by Mainely Haiku of Downeastuh
Get your Moxie up.
Take Coke from Doctor Pepper
Or Hunter Biden.
Haiku # 70713, May 26, 2021 1:40 pm ET
by Bicycle tha Crack Ho of Laptoplandia
Your satisfaction
guaranteed at this website
Quality Haikus
Haiku # 70712, May 26, 2021 1:59 am ET
by Our new policy of Under Old Willow
Un monopolio:
Cuando los monos mandan
en monomundo.
Haiku # 70711, May 25, 2021 10:17 pm ET
by Fulano Banano of Guneo
i wonder if i
should get people from twitter
to come here to tell

me to fuck off
Haiku # 70710, May 25, 2021 8:26 pm ET
by moxie
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