Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
27 Years, 166 Days and 77047 Haiku later...

Speaking of Star Wars,
How do you like the trailer?
Kicking a dead horse?

I guess it's not dead
if it keeps spitting out cash.
Where's my light saber?
Haiku # 52654, June 15, 2015 8:19 am ET
by Darth Figpucker
time to rise philae !
perihelion is near
you have work to do
Haiku # 52653, June 15, 2015 6:55 am ET
by ash
Ah yes. Gay StarWars themed wedding. Where's JanAss The Hutt with her elegant boo-tay? Nippress reading Proust aloud while Ash weeps openly whilst licking the pages if GQ Mazagine.
Haiku # 52652, June 14, 2015 6:37 pm ET
by iamback
Ashy Nippressy....two as one, one as two. Lovers of the gay, taking a poo.
Haiku # 52651, June 14, 2015 6:35 pm ET
by iamback
Ash.....Nippress.......Darth Gaydar and StormPooper. They have great lil' Jawa babies from having the gay sex.
Haiku # 52650, June 14, 2015 6:33 pm ET
by iamback
ten trillion dollars ?
all your basis are belong
chinese stock market
Haiku # 52649, June 14, 2015 5:56 am ET
by ash
Stan is an asshat
He stole all my Doritos
I must be avenged!
Haiku # 52648, June 14, 2015 4:01 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Bodily functions
do not create bad haiku.
It's vice versa.
Haiku # 52647, June 13, 2015 5:55 pm ET
by Darth Figpucker
She has got nice tits.
But then so does her brother.
Both are natural.
Haiku # 52646, June 12, 2015 6:35 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
who buys a great dane ?
surely coprophiliacs
who like foamy drool
Haiku # 52645, June 12, 2015 5:08 am ET
by ash
healthy choice for me
what's next for my svelte body?
Peppermint Patty!
Haiku # 52644, June 11, 2015 6:38 pm ET
by studboy of Santa Monica, CA
Robert E. Howard's
Conan the Barbarian
walked by and farted.
Haiku # 52643, June 11, 2015 6:29 pm ET
by Darth Figpucker
typing slowly now
was working diligently
then coffee ran out
Haiku # 52642, June 11, 2015 6:11 pm ET
by studboy of Santa Monica, CA
haiku after lunch
I am procrastinating
in Lil Bub we trust
Haiku # 52641, June 11, 2015 6:11 pm ET
by studboy of Santa Monica, CA
we're in awesome times
surely, world peace not far off
Sriracha mayo
Haiku # 52640, June 11, 2015 6:10 pm ET
by studboy of Santa Monica, CA
we are so lonely
wifi has forsaken us
no route to host found
Haiku # 52639, June 11, 2015 6:09 pm ET
by studboy of Santa Monica, CA
though we cannot work
internet we love you so
we blame Verizon
Haiku # 52638, June 11, 2015 6:09 pm ET
by studboy of Santa Monica, CA
when the network fails
lonely T-rex plays with me
curse you, Pterodactyl!
Haiku # 52637, June 11, 2015 6:08 pm ET
by studboy of Santa Monica, CA
What do you get when
two puns walk into a bar.
A fucking haiku!
Haiku # 52636, June 10, 2015 7:04 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Playwriting is hard?
Write a play about Geico.
Cave men can do it.
Haiku # 52635, June 10, 2015 7:02 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
I just remembered,
playwriting is difficult.
Still, it can be fun
Haiku # 52633, June 10, 2015 1:01 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
It is so easy,
even cave men can do it.
Geico Insurance
Haiku # 52629, June 9, 2015 12:48 am ET
by Commercial nostalgia
Coffee is a drug.
But I've never sucked a dick
for caffeine money.
Haiku # 52628, June 8, 2015 8:31 am ET
by Darth Figpucker
Livin' the good life.
Gettin' that K-mart pussy
at WalMart prices.
Haiku # 52627, June 8, 2015 8:00 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
By this time next year
I'm going to own the world.
All poets must leave.
Haiku # 52623, June 7, 2015 2:02 pm ET
by Darth Figpucker
Wild Saturday night
Sunday morning hangover
Must drink less next time
Haiku # 52622, June 7, 2015 12:10 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Victory is ours!
Pour forth your foggy musings
unburdened by spam
Haiku # 52621, June 7, 2015 2:17 am ET
by Eye no nutting
I do not know why
But i am bad at Haikus
Five syllable line
Haiku # 52620, June 7, 2015 2:01 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
There was a crack down.
Large spam bot servers shut off.
Or something like that.

I read it somewhere.
Does not mean that it is true.
Either way, I'm glad.

Back to bad haiku.
Farts, burps, and genital scabs.
Awful stuff like that.
Haiku # 52619, June 6, 2015 8:01 pm ET
by Darth Figpucker of the basement of Satan's outhouse.
haiku surges on
leaving spam bots floundering
and a write-full plaice
Haiku # 52618, June 6, 2015 7:41 am ET
by ash
Seriously, I
think that the spammers gave up.
Internet history?
Haiku # 52617, June 5, 2015 12:23 pm ET
by Janis
The old beggar scratched.
It was not done politely.
One would almost think.
Haiku # 52616, June 4, 2015 9:53 pm ET
by Darth Figpucker
The clock is ticking.
Nintendo seems to stop it.
Look in the mirror.
Haiku # 52615, June 4, 2015 2:01 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
There was a dead dog.
She poked it with a long stick.
Maggots slithered out.
Haiku # 52614, June 4, 2015 1:48 pm ET
by Darth Figpucker the Highly Inappropriate of my mother's basement
No spam to clean up?
Unfuckingbelievable
Boner pills for all!!!!
Haiku # 52613, June 3, 2015 1:31 pm ET
by Janis
Monkey's throwing poo.
Tourists get a souvenir.
Throwing poo looks fun.
Haiku # 52612, June 3, 2015 12:44 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Better a chat room
than a message board of spam.
Please buy my used car.

I'm a puffer fish.
Puffing wacky tobaccy.
But only sometimes.
Haiku # 52611, June 3, 2015 7:12 am ET
by www.darthfigpucker.com
Skiddle de bee bop
Doodle de tee top shoe shop
Wabba wee doop dip
Haiku # 52610, June 3, 2015 12:50 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Flat fish had a wish
to live free in the ocean,
not cooked on a dish
Haiku # 52609, June 3, 2015 12:45 am ET
by I gno nuff timg
Webdriver Torso:
Blue and red rectangles go
BEEP BOOP BLOP BEEP DOOP
Haiku # 52608, June 2, 2015 8:07 pm ET
by Flat the Fish of Atlantic Ocean
I am a flat fish
I live in the Atlantic
I write bad haiku
Haiku # 52607, June 2, 2015 7:46 pm ET
by Flat the Fish of Atlantic Ocean
Beware of the time
when some stupid idiot
makes this a chat room.
Haiku # 52606, June 2, 2015 7:45 pm ET
by Flat the Fish of The Atlantic Ocean
Haikus do not rhyme
'cept when they really need to
so violets are blue
Haiku # 52605, June 2, 2015 7:36 pm ET
by Flat the Fish of Atlantic Ocean
I will praise who wrote
that haiku 'bout Flat the Fish
and other flat stuff
Haiku # 52604, June 2, 2015 7:30 pm ET
by Flat the Fish of Atlantic Ocean
Many write Haikus
about a flat fish who writes
very bad haikus
Haiku # 52603, June 2, 2015 7:25 pm ET
by Flat the Fish of Atlantic Ocean
Lady Gaga's ass.
A fish that can write haiku.
A piece of paper.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Things that are flat.
Haiku # 52602, June 2, 2015 4:00 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Don't drink soda pop.
Mosquitoes love CO2.
And also sugar.
Haiku # 52601, June 2, 2015 3:56 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Tobacco junkies.
Brown-stained fingers and clothing.
Let us laugh at them.

How they suck Death's dick.
White tiny smoke-spewing cock.
And they pay for it.
Haiku # 52600, June 2, 2015 3:52 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Rednecks cooking meth.
Crackheads breaking into cars.
Children at the park.
Haiku # 52599, June 2, 2015 3:48 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
They are not nice men.
They ride loud motorcycles.
And they wear crosses.
Haiku # 52598, June 2, 2015 3:47 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
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