I liked going in
John Malkovich's mind for the
rental fee, 3 bucks...

a deal for the life
of an avante, guard

ok, met a mashed kitten
skirmishing pc crowd swore soft
ho, foul matey, i yowl!

an anagram of 21331

voyeur, i vomit fame
i swill its ghostlike ebb
a meatiest plop!

(an anagram of the previous haiku, with help from www.wordsmith.org)

My favourite movie
Is still The Big Lebowski
It appeals to me

well, it would be odd
to pray against monopoly
but that I shall do...

A trip to LA
Airline monopolies suck
Must fly from Buff'lo

to glue bone to bone
now that's what i'd call useful
if somewhat too late

that was funny :P

hmm, canadian nirvana
a bit of snow, add Mike myers
yeah baby, liberation in the
great white north?

of aroostook county

Speaking of gluing
Here is a nice handy guide
For what sticks to what

actually I won't
being broken, trying to
break others, into self

glued back together
forgotten and begotten

I shall break you, ap...

reacting to the
old scapegoat , the thing kicks back
and takes the sinners

with him, over the cliff edge

the west is the best
jimmy forgot that earth is
an elliptoid

we are all the same
music television is
not quite right i guess

crunching their wafers
slurping down the altar wine
pardon such manners

whilst far from perfect
by swallowing your story
all is forgiven

baby oh baby
you are the cutest thing known
but not your nappy

die mother fucker!
you fat bloated spaz in a
white dress, die! die! die!

the pope is a cunt!
this reflects badly on me,
my attitude sucks.

but towards women only...

fuck the fucking pope!
fuck the fucking pilgrim dudes!
fuck the fucking faith!

thinking of someone
who looks like a tire-heap
makes me feel better....:)

i spit when i talk
i fart when i walk and i
like to eat burgers

michelin and mac do
chemistry made me plastic
everybody sees

fat boy slim is no
excuse i look like a heap
of tires, fuck you!

underground london
beautiful girl caresses
my ass with her ass

i want to whisper
love me stanta pede but
i'm just a butthead

batman and superman
saving the world together
two lonely heroes

schwarzenegger cool
stallone dumbest ass of all
jean-claude is the best

let us be heroes
we cannot save the world but
let us try harder

@

HAIKU
HAIKU
HAIKU

.....
.......
.....

Don't make the mistake,
Of crossing swords with me, PRICK!
You will eat my hoof.

Betty LeBomb is
The lamest person online
Rape and kill her Please

mY mOm Is A wHoRe
My SiStEr Is A cUm SlUt
GrAnDmA's GoT a CoCk

yaawwwwwnnnnA

yawn

I'm so damn irish
that when I shower I cut
my soap with a knife

bongo bongo plotz
ting ting ting humpa humpa
big bam schlongo hai

you horny biznotch
get me ready for lovin
now suck on the rod

post-lubrication
I fuck you in the rectum
and damn is it good

fuck off you god damn
pope, you are fucking up the
telie schedule

perfidious fart
why why hast thou deserted me
pleasing aroma

sigh...fuck off moxie!

in a rush, limbaugh...
climb a hill, capricorn, man
but do what thou wilt?

k sarong, sarong,
and two sarongs do not make it right,
what will freeze will freeze.

Yes, Bad Haiku is
an aggregate of souls, who
form a floating world,

Individuals
Are lost, through accident or
Despair, one by one.

i love my sarong
but it's winter here right now
and my balls aren't brass

Maybe they have been
to Thailand or just want you
think they have been there?

Men in dresses here,
Harbingers of summer-time,
Baker Street coolies.

last night's storyboard
a tropical explorer
without any cares

new autumn colors
are rustling in my mailbox
j. crew has arrived

"distant from the world"
that's what "telemundo" means
you missed the sunset

It dies for a while
Then without any notice
It comes back again

bad haiku is dead
there is nothing more to say
long live bad haiku!

a man in a dress
offering wine and wafers
it makes me wonder

sorry honey I was drunk

Why do I chase you?
You are way out of my reach
I think I'll stop now