Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
28 Years, 30 Days and 77414 Haiku later...

Hoe-ass bitch better
Recognize, motherfucker, Or hoe-ass gon' die!
Haiku # 285, August 12, 1997 4:15 am ET
by Humpy of Usa
You bastard cat, get
Off the goddamn counter or
I'll freeze you solid!!
Haiku # 284, August 12, 1997 4:04 am ET
by Humpy Dallas, USA
Amish bastards love
You, so the least you could do
Is leave them alone.
Haiku # 283, August 12, 1997 4:03 am ET
by Humpy Dallas, USA
Death mail to chickens
Isn't as safe as it seems
Some have machine guns.
Haiku # 282, August 12, 1997 4:00 am ET
by Humpy Dallas, USA
last night I was bored
So I gave my cat a bath.

Still fur on my tongue.

Haiku # 281, August 5, 1997 6:40 pm ET
by cousin of USA -
Volleyball in pool,
if ball bounces in, it's fair.
Jan's team always wins.
Haiku # 280, August 5, 1997 5:28 pm ET
by cousin of Cleveburg, You ess, eh?
Little Billy Goat
Soft grey fur and sideways eyes
I shoot up your ass
Haiku # 279, August 1, 1997 9:15 pm ET
by Squishy Lover of Los Angeles, USA
At the urinal
I piss as hard as I can
Cant break cigarette
EAT MY ASS !
Eric Marcus
Haiku # 278, July 20, 1997 5:59 am ET
by Eric.marcus@tanet.com of Suckoville, CA, Yemen (semen)
I have a big dog
His name is "Go fuck yourself"
My mom hates that name.
Haiku # 277, July 20, 1997 5:54 am ET
by Eric Marcus of Penoche, U of Fucking S A
thought it was a fart
put my hand down my underwear
it was a wet mess
Haiku # 276, July 17, 1997 9:50 pm ET
by Bractune of Los Angeles, USA
bird flys in the wind
i see it over my head
it shits on my cheek
Haiku # 275, July 17, 1997 9:48 pm ET
by Bractune of Los Angeles, USA
Come here little sheep
Your fur is so soft and white
Do you have VD?
Haiku # 274, July 14, 1997 7:11 am ET
by Bractune of Los Angeles, USA
I kick the midget
I laugh at his tiny dick
I think I smell cheese
Haiku # 273, July 14, 1997 7:03 am ET
by Bractune of Los Angeles, USA
i want to lick you
And feel you get really hard
And become insane
Haiku # 272, July 11, 1997 9:42 pm ET
by to little john
i love to kiss you
i suck your passionate lips
harder and harder
Haiku # 271, July 11, 1997 6:57 pm ET
by to emma of philadelphia, usa
Cold beverage in hand
Floating in warm gentle waves
I found paradise
Haiku # 270, July 11, 1997 2:57 pm ET
by Mr.Ed of Montréal,
The homeless woman
Has no pants and smells like poo
I spit on her face!!
Haiku # 269, July 11, 1997 5:08 am ET
by Eric Jello of Penoche, US of fuckin A
I am so happy
I never knew of true love
Until I met you
Haiku # 268, July 10, 1997 10:50 pm ET
by Kathryn Tong of Garden City, USA
i dreamt of your lips
i gaze into your dark eyes
i miss you a lot
Haiku # 267, July 10, 1997 3:19 pm ET
by alan lee of philadelphia, usa
the retarded boy
has no pants and smells like poo
I KILL HIM WITH STICK
Haiku # 266, July 4, 1997 5:21 am ET
by Bractune of Los Angeles, USA
stop looking at me
brown eye, I lick and suck it
uuum! she cums for me.
Haiku # 265, July 2, 1997 9:27 am ET
by martez evans of fayetteville, usa


Haiku # 264, July 2, 1997 9:21 am ET
by martez evans of fayetteville, usa
I once bit a possum
Forever he reminded me
Of burnt ball
Haiku # 263, June 26, 1997 6:28 pm ET
by Trevor Scully of S'pore, S'pore
My father sells fishballs
Oh pray tis the bullock
I farted aloof
Haiku # 262, June 23, 1997 5:59 pm ET
by Trevor Scully of Singapore, Singapore
My Scheherazade,
Janis keeps me with Haiku
I should be working.
Haiku # 261, June 18, 1997 12:15 pm ET
by Robert Milby of Sant Cruz, USA
Everything is fine
I guess everything is fine
Yep, it's all ok
Haiku # 260, June 16, 1997 12:56 am ET
by Haiku Master of Canada
badda bing badda
boom can
Haiku # 259, June 13, 1997 11:23 am ET
by Scott Duncan of Toronto, Canada
Forgive me for the
Dew drops that I caused to flow
From your heart last night
Haiku # 258, June 12, 1997 11:06 pm ET
by Kevin Doyle of Honolulu, US
I guess I forgot:
the haikus on these pages
are bad by design.
Haiku # 257, June 12, 1997 8:51 pm ET
by Terry C. of New York City, Pennsylvania
BAD HAIKU
HORRIBLY BAD
YOU KNOW I LOVE IT
Haiku # 256, June 12, 1997 7:50 pm ET
by JOSH CATONE of INSANITY, CHAOS
DEATH ON A HILLTOP
ALL COOL AND SERENE
DEATH IS A DREAM
Haiku # 255, June 12, 1997 7:49 pm ET
by JOSH CATONE of INSANITY, CHAOS
TIME IS A DRIFTER
WITH CANE AND HAT
TIME ENDS--ABRUPT DEATH
Haiku # 254, June 12, 1997 7:48 pm ET
by JOSH CATONE of INSANITY, CHAOS
KILL ALL THY FOES
VANQUISH THE DEAD
DEATH WILL COME SOON
Haiku # 253, June 12, 1997 7:44 pm ET
by JOSH CATONE of INSANITY, CHAOS
Hey! To be haiku,
the poem must allude to
one of the seasons
Haiku # 252, June 11, 1997 8:46 pm ET
by Terry C of New York City, Pennsylvania
stumble in lift lid
groggy eyes spot spry Tabby
cat bats at my stream
Haiku # 251, June 10, 1997 2:10 pm ET
by Mick of Toronto,
hardly touched the cap
used paper napkin to pump
hands STILL smell like gas
Haiku # 250, June 10, 1997 2:09 pm ET
by Mick of Tor,
Who's the cat you won't
cop out when there is danger all
about? Shaft. Right On !
Haiku # 249, June 9, 1997 11:24 pm ET
by Issac Hayes of Toronto, Canada
A rat is trying
to Gnaw it's way out of my
uterus. Mydol ?
Haiku # 248, June 9, 1997 11:22 pm ET
by Terence G. of Toronto, Canada

Knowing what you want
by giving you
more than you expect
Haiku # 247, June 6, 1997 12:00 pm ET
by Thumby of New York, USA
I hear the Spam ball
It bounces, porqua, porqua
A haiku of Spring
Haiku # 246, June 5, 1997 2:07 pm ET
by -B. Tallen
Vanilla Ice, Man
The Hottest New Thang in Rap
Say hi to yer Mom
Haiku # 245, June 5, 1997 11:30 am ET
by Kavin Labin of Toron, Adanac

Angela
Haiku # 244, June 5, 1997 6:58 am ET
by angelabs@micron.net
Worldly things will pass
Like petals on the wind. Still,
O.J. chaps my butt.
Haiku # 243, June 1, 1997 2:41 am ET
by Chris
Worldly things will pass
Like petals on the wind. Still,
O.J. chaps by mutt.
Haiku # 242, June 1, 1997 2:41 am ET
by Chris
Worldly things will pass
Like petals on the wind. Still,
O.J. chaps by mutt.
Haiku # 241, June 1, 1997 2:40 am ET
by Chris
Purple caretaker
Beloved but repetitive
Barney dies today
Haiku # 240, June 1, 1997 2:34 am ET
by Chris
Girl-child, why do you
Cry and wail and carry on?
Elmo giggles not.
Chris
Haiku # 239, June 1, 1997 2:32 am ET
by dcchris750@aol.com
Girl-child, why do you
Cry and wail and carry on?
Elmo giggles not.
Chris
Haiku # 238, June 1, 1997 2:31 am ET
by dcchris750@aol.com
My goldfish Sparky
Went belly up as I worked.
Toilet of sorrow.
Haiku # 237, June 1, 1997 2:29 am ET
by Chris
My goldfish Sparky
Went belly up as I worked.
Toilet of sorrow.
Haiku # 236, June 1, 1997 2:29 am ET
by Chris
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