here is a warning
if i got herpes from you
i'll cut off your tits

get out of my bed
you took advantage of me
i have tought you well

brutal hangover
after that much alcohol
shouldn't i be dead

twelves shots of yager
i wake up naked in bed
where the hell am i

The cave of darkness
The sun will never shine here
A good place to crap

moon's been up all night
the sun's rising in the east
where else could it rise?

eerie still dawning
flat silver grey ocean waits
quietly for blue

silver moonlight gone
streaks of light on horizon
running feet slap sand

a dozen oysters
consumed with tobasco sauce
every one a hit

A bell sounds my dog
Salivates. Here

Out of sight, out of
Mind, translates. Invisible
Idiot, how true!

Its an out of mind
and body experience,
so nobody minds

Birthdays are good for
You, because the more you have
the longer you live

The line is thread-like
between the boat and the shore
winds blow out to sea

They tell me if I
could extract the gold from sea
water I

Who the hell likes raw
Oysters, tastes like gritty sea
Water, no thank you

Cooking Chinese food
First thing in the morning its
bit too rich for me

Fresh coffee just made
God it tastes good, my wake up.
Ready for the day

Interesting! Grass
bends with the wind right to left
Clouds blown left to right

Twenty billion fly

The stars, so distant
Time and space lie between us
Star Trek is for dorks

Anti-semitic?
You are one hateful little
White trash scumbag fool

Thoughts that can change life
Truth told by wise men of old
I like big booties

Thirty thousand now
Question we must ask ourselves
Do we have a life?

The waterfall brings peace
My soul becomes one with it
Now I have to pee

Puzzles that haunt man
Mysteries remain unknown
Why do hippies suck?

Sexy lady kiss
Tastes so good on my soft lips
Better than my dog

The fleas bite me now
Their bites irritate my skin
I should bath far more

The trees will all die
Their lives pass without notice
I dont care at all

I enjoy haiku
I enjoy Vanilla Ice
I enjoy cheap whores

The flexible man!
Needs no one and gives nothing
He fellates himself

The flies swarm and eat
The poop becomes their dinner
Flies are idiots

Where are you going?
I said where are you going?!
McDonalds, huh? Yuck.

What's the deal with that?
Really, I dont have a clue
Tell me now Seinfeld

Once I dreamt of her
Her kisses tasted like cloth
I kissed my pillow

time for bar hopping
back-alley blowjobs await
see ya tomorrow

i write hallmark cards:
you're that much closer to death
happy birthday mom

Whah, whah, whah whaaaahhhh!
(Sounds like Charlie Brown's
teacher)

zibba zabba zippy wonka,
wibba wabba wally bonka,
stonka dubie donka plonka

the final frontier
close your eyes and meditate
do you see it now?

i must keep in step
it is fruitless to complain
just keep on dancing

pretty little bee
sunflower concupiscence
nature's own porno

a busy routine
but i always take time out
for crappy haiku

i say what i say
no matter how it comes out
so please bear with me

mangled sentences
the sound of harsh consonants
no poet am i

buddha gets grounded
no nirvana for a week
unless you behave

this is not a phase
for a cynic like myself
there's nowhere to go

I screwed my mother
But my father complained, he
Told me he had Aids

daddy got layed off
it's a fact of modern life
you're expendable

i'm still not convinced
that pain is an illusion
for it's all too real

the music of tool
a sonic revelation
glorious mind-fuck

I'm off to DC
gnome and me to see Dubba,
gotz 'splainin' to do