Bashō says something unhelpful
Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
29 Years, 69 Days and 78031 Haiku later...
I imagine you:
Greasy-haired obese misfit
With a toilet brain
Haiku # 61746 January 18, 2019 11:14 pm ET
by Am I Close
They called him Fangtooth
And the name stuck like hot glue
Or gum you stepped in
Haiku # 61745 January 18, 2019 11:04 pm ET
by Mofo
Gotta be the next
Want my poem to be next
Make my poem next
Haiku # 61744 January 18, 2019 11:01 pm ET
by After Bertha of Complacent Placenta
Those roast beef curtains
Bespoke draperies parted.
Stinkfish Puppet Show
Haiku # 61743 January 18, 2019 10:59 pm ET
by Big Bad Bertha
Weevils in the flour
They make the doughnuts taste good
Please don't explain glaze
Haiku # 61742 January 18, 2019 10:55 pm ET
by Bitch of Please
Cramping sensation
Feel a haiku coming on
Nope, just a cuntfart
Haiku # 61741 January 18, 2019 10:53 pm ET
by CuntfartCuntfartcunt of Cunt
Plus size poetry
Rolled it in flour. Wet spot.
What's your excuse now
Haiku # 61740 January 18, 2019 10:51 pm ET
by Busty Belinda of Bakery
You can call me Darth
You can call me Starkitten
Or just VHS
Haiku # 61739 January 18, 2019 4:20 pm ET
by Me Myself and I of Here There Everywhere
Highlights of my day
Fart smile Coffee smile Shit smile
Eat smile Haiku smile
Haiku # 61738 January 18, 2019 3:43 pm ET
by Smiley
When someone's knocking
I may not answer it
And that is tough shit
Haiku # 61737 January 18, 2019 3:38 pm ET
by Person not answering door of Other side of door
Not into kissing
Bacteria Festival
People are so gross
Haiku # 61736 January 18, 2019 3:37 pm ET
by Grossed Out of Far Out
All out of coffee
Ran out of tea days ago
Toilet Paper next?
Haiku # 61735 January 18, 2019 3:34 pm ET
by Running out
I'm hanging out now
Three quarters of my ass crack
Fell out of my pants
Haiku # 61734 January 18, 2019 3:16 pm ET
by Breezy of Chair
Autocorrect shit
I hate you autocorrect
I hate your bullshit
Haiku # 61733 January 18, 2019 3:13 pm ET
by Person when hates autocorrect of When I fight autocorrect autocorrect always wins
Get your butt in gear
Bad Haiku can't write itself
Allows poets on deck
Haiku # 61732 January 18, 2019 3:11 pm ET
by Poet Pep Rally of Poem Chamber
Belching volcano
So rude. Please excuse yourself
I'll fart in your face
Haiku # 61731 January 18, 2019 3:08 pm ET
by National Poopyographic
Meanwhile, Darth be like:
Ima sniff farts and talk more about sexy poop.
Haiku # 61730 January 18, 2019 7:52 am ET
by Freudian Regressions of Darth
Nairobi attacked
by sub-human scum. Of course
no news over here...

https://tinyurl.com/yanrebok
Haiku # 61729 January 18, 2019 7:50 am ET
by Watu Wajinga of Taka-taka
Haiku fools gather
Come closer to catch the whiff
Fresh laid fart eggs stink
Haiku # 61728 January 18, 2019 2:48 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Was just wondering
If you had a good movement
Of your bowels yet

Me? Three times a day
Indoor plumbing would be nice
Shit in a bucket
Haiku # 61727 January 18, 2019 2:18 am ET
by Bucket washer
Justice for all dinks
Some will be removed by axe
Others with acid
Haiku # 61726 January 18, 2019 1:34 am ET
by Eli's Zounigshers of NYC
Flex muscles of love
One can of spinach and hard
Healthy bonersnake
Haiku # 61725 January 18, 2019 12:28 am ET
by Oneeye
Ejaculation
Off the bridge. Into the fog
Clouds silver lining
Haiku # 61724 January 18, 2019 12:26 am ET
by Meatbeaterologist of Live
Muscles are so cute
Tattoos on your muscles dance
Shriveled hula girl
Haiku # 61723 January 18, 2019 12:23 am ET
by Leila of Beach
Gameplay was easy
My new name is Glorkwizzix
My carrot is waxed
Haiku # 61722 January 18, 2019 12:21 am ET
by Poopy
Reclining, still life
Motionless. Playing statues.
Now wanking top speed
Haiku # 61721 January 18, 2019 12:19 am ET
by Made u look
Tiger Balm burn dink
Torch asshole membranes too
Shit came out on fire
Haiku # 61720 January 18, 2019 12:16 am ET
by Sore Loser
Nice blank space action!
Like making love with The Void...
romantic Haiku.
Haiku # 61719 January 17, 2019 8:50 pm ET
by Avoidance of Empty Space
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Haiku # 61718 January 17, 2019 8:19 pm ET
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Haiku # 61717 January 17, 2019 8:18 pm ET
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Haiku # 61716 January 17, 2019 8:18 pm ET
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Haiku # 61715 January 17, 2019 8:18 pm ET
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Haiku # 61714 January 17, 2019 8:17 pm ET
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Haiku # 61713 January 17, 2019 8:17 pm ET
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Haiku # 61712 January 17, 2019 8:17 pm ET
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Haiku # 61711 January 17, 2019 8:17 pm ET
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Haiku # 61710 January 17, 2019 8:16 pm ET
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Haiku # 61709 January 17, 2019 8:16 pm ET
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Haiku # 61708 January 17, 2019 8:16 pm ET
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Haiku # 61707 January 17, 2019 8:16 pm ET
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Haiku # 61706 January 17, 2019 8:16 pm ET
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Haiku # 61705 January 17, 2019 8:16 pm ET
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Haiku # 61704 January 17, 2019 8:16 pm ET
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Haiku # 61703 January 17, 2019 8:15 pm ET
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Haiku # 61702 January 17, 2019 8:15 pm ET
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Haiku # 61701 January 17, 2019 8:14 pm ET
by
I am VHS
You also are VHS
We are VHS!
Haiku # 61700 January 17, 2019 4:06 pm ET
by Vertical Helical Scan of Video Home System
I foretell future !
Figpucker shall write haiku
about shit. And stuff . . .
Haiku # 61699 January 17, 2019 4:01 pm ET
by Steaming mound of Darth's haiku
Gillette self-destruct:
Nanny-state selling razors.
Grow beard. Shut up, mom.
Haiku # 61698 January 17, 2019 3:58 pm ET
by Good luck selling it to anyone but dumb Amerikrats
Toxic masculine!
Wat a fooking joke aiiii yaaa!
Yes, dat's wat she said.
Haiku # 61697 January 17, 2019 3:05 pm ET
by Wong Lofan of Kalifornia