Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
27 Years, 135 Days and 76969 Haiku later...

Anywho... he's hot.
Squeal like a piggy, boy!
Jap deliverance.
Haiku # 72155, September 24, 2021 6:00 am ET
by Redneck in Japan
The rotten dog guy.
The guy at top of this page!
Up at the top right.

If you don't see him,
maybe you're just on your phone.
He's got text balloon.
Haiku # 72154, September 24, 2021 5:58 am ET
by These rotten verses even a dog will not eat. of You don't see that?!?! Rotten dog guy.
What a sight to see
Watching dinosaurs go poop
Did they bury it?

Someone fill me in
Did dinosaurs have big dinks?
Who would know this stuff?
Haiku # 72151, September 23, 2021 11:32 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
When someone tells you
you give head like a porn star
What do you say back?

Probably, nothing.
It's not proper etiquette
talking while eating
Haiku # 72150, September 23, 2021 8:55 pm ET
by Free 24 Hour Advice Hotline of Under Old Willow
I once saw a dog
all alone, trotting along
with a paper bag
Haiku # 72149, September 23, 2021 7:36 pm ET
by My name is Rover of Alpoholics Anonymous
What the what the what?
Who is the rotten dog guy?
Hate him already
Haiku # 72148, September 23, 2021 7:31 pm ET
by Boner of Contention
That rotten dog guy,
I bet he'd give head for cash.
I mean, look at him.
Haiku # 72147, September 23, 2021 7:11 pm ET
by Just look!
Pumpkin spice blow jobs.
Milf, soccer mom, hippie head.
Fragrant relaxing.
Haiku # 72146, September 23, 2021 6:39 pm ET
by Time to unbox my nuclear powered Fleshlight. of Fuel rods ready. Control rods in place. Coolant flowing.... Let's do this!
Great behinds stink alike.
Yes, that's six syllables.
I don't care.
Haiku # 72145, September 23, 2021 6:25 pm ET
by It's always time for cheese! of Fromunda fromage homage
the Jack-Off-Lantern

from the makers of

Fleshlight

Pumpkin Spice Scented


And for the Ladies


Your Hollow won't be Sleepy


Headless Horsecock Dong
Haiku # 72144, September 23, 2021 10:43 am ET
by Made in China (Like the China Virus) of Genuine Trump Silicone
Timer! Just saw that
watching vintage commercials
couple days ago
Haiku # 72143, September 23, 2021 10:27 am ET
by Noticer of wagon wheels ! Ha ha
Humpin' a pumpkin
is only a sin if the
pumpkin is a dude.
Haiku # 72142, September 23, 2021 8:09 am ET
by Leviticus something something. of And the Lord sayeth thou may humpeth the fruits of the field, but not the gay fruits, for that is detestible.
But why get them out?!
Let the candy corn stay there.
Sugar rush all day.

Or tie them on a string and pull them out at a rate of about 2 per second at the moment of climax, just like the working girls do in Paris. Yes, I am a salesman for Brach's candy. How did you know?
Haiku # 72140, September 23, 2021 7:33 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
You got it backwards.
Tootsie Rolls taste like cat poop.
Yes, I have tried both.

Candy paired with poop.
While visiting Germany.
They're into that there.
Haiku # 72139, September 23, 2021 7:25 am ET
by Never again!... I mean never again for Tootsie Rolls. The poop wasn't anywhere near as bad. of Boost your microbiome! LOL!
Oh that cheesy guy...
Is our poet feeling bleu
Thinking of fromage?
Haiku # 72138, September 23, 2021 7:24 am ET
by Le Duc of Rennet
Oh that cheesy guy...
Is our poet feeling bleu
Thinking of fromage?
Haiku # 72137, September 23, 2021 7:24 am ET
by Le Duc of Rennet
Autumn mysteries......
How do you get candy corn
out of your sphincter?

Why does cat feces
look and taste like Tootsie Rolls?
Sin to screw pumpkins?
Haiku # 72136, September 23, 2021 2:06 am ET
by Pipe layer of Laying pumpkin spice pipe
Bruce Springsteen's birthday
Is that the Jersey Devil?
Or just him grunting?
Haiku # 72135, September 23, 2021 12:38 am ET
by Greetings of Dingleberry Park
Broadcast Disruption
Tentacled Difficulties
Please Stand By x 8
Haiku # 72134, September 23, 2021 12:33 am ET
by Broadcast of Cephalopodcast
Tentacled surprise
on South Carolina beach
Cephalopod News
Haiku # 72133, September 23, 2021 12:08 am ET
by Cephalopod Update of Channel 8
Could constipate, though
But I'm sure the poetry
would find a way out
Haiku # 72132, September 22, 2021 10:09 pm ET
by Dank Johnplugger
I'd make it for you
Extra sharp Vermont cheddar
with Gruyere/ Jarlsberg

Put down the Balut
Eat macaroni and cheese
It sticks to your ribs
Haiku # 72131, September 22, 2021 10:03 pm ET
by Cheesus Christ of Almighty
But I do not think.
My sphincter does the writing.
Black hole collapsing.
Haiku # 72130, September 22, 2021 9:59 pm ET
by Here it clap and sing.
Sometimes you are me.
It is identity theft.
Are you entertained?

Please entertain us.
Do not enter my anus.
Exit Uranus.
Haiku # 72129, September 22, 2021 9:56 pm ET
by I still feel sad for Pluto.
I miss my surf board.
I also miss fancy cheese.
Surf boards of cheddar?!?

Fondu wave surfing
on a fantasy planet
or the holodeck.
Haiku # 72128, September 22, 2021 9:51 pm ET
by Drowning in Gruyere. of What a way to go.
Sometimes Darth thinks that
I'm the only poet here.
Darth, I might be Shit . . .
Haiku # 72127, September 22, 2021 9:50 pm ET
by Haiku Hologram of Holistic Horror
Some people are good.
But not if they are poets.
Or Filippinos.
Haiku # 72126, September 22, 2021 9:46 pm ET
by God told me your address. of I drove by your house. I need a 50BMG.
Sometimes I think Darth
is the only poet here
Shit, I might be Darth
Haiku # 72125, September 22, 2021 9:29 pm ET
by Who am I? of How did I end up here?
When Flatulence Kills...
(LIVE) Methane Lab Explosion
Watch Smellovision
Haiku # 72124, September 22, 2021 5:46 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet of Channel 2
All the poets here
They live in different time zones
but they're all the same
Haiku # 72123, September 22, 2021 2:35 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Darth, you wrote that book,
That rambling weird-ass book.
Has it sold that well?
Haiku # 72122, September 22, 2021 2:14 pm ET
by Live Evil of Vile Levi
The dispensaries
Since legal, there are plenty
It's like a candy store!
Haiku # 72121, September 22, 2021 1:12 pm ET
by Noticer of Devil's Lettuce
this address right here
owned by an evil wizard
I can't wait to move
Haiku # 72120, September 22, 2021 1:08 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
In America
how many dispenseries
are up and running?

I need to get high.
Like really need, not just want.
And then watch South Park.
Haiku # 72119, September 22, 2021 12:22 pm ET
by like all night long
What address?
Haiku # 72118, September 22, 2021 12:18 pm ET
by curious
He's small potatoes
If you want to see evil
go to this address
Haiku # 72117, September 22, 2021 5:18 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
I'm not a doctor
but just performed surgery
We'll see how it goes
Haiku # 72116, September 22, 2021 5:04 am ET
by Caduceus of Wild
Calling Hannover Fist!

“I am the sum of all evils. Look carefully. My power infests all times, all galaxies, all dimensions. But many still seek me out; a green jewel they must possess. But see how I destroy their lives.”
Haiku # 72115, September 22, 2021 4:55 am ET
by --The Locknar
Hangin's too good for her!
Burnin's too good for her!
She should be torn into
little bitsy pieces
and burried alive!
Haiku # 72114, September 22, 2021 4:51 am ET
by Stern (Heavy Metal)
I am not Satan!
And she is no friend of mine!
Thou shalt not suffer...

That a witch may live.
The death penalty is good
in cases like these.
Haiku # 72113, September 22, 2021 4:48 am ET
by You understand, I'm sure.
That sultry Natasha
Sexy sidekick of Boris
I love her low voice
Haiku # 72112, September 22, 2021 4:41 am ET
by These Leetle Squeerel End Moose of Pottsylvania
Olive Oyl was hot.
I love how her legs could stretch.
She beats Betty Boop.
Haiku # 72111, September 22, 2021 4:29 am ET
by Famous Ladies of Celluloid
Vintage commercials
I just watched Morris the Cat
Go look on YouTube
Haiku # 72110, September 22, 2021 2:19 am ET
by I Love of Morris the Cat
Say Bluto did it.
Remember the frog said that
You must like Popeye
Haiku # 72109, September 21, 2021 11:38 pm ET
by Bluto did it of Bluto did it
No marijuanas
You can't have no piranhas
Yes to iguanas
Haiku # 72108, September 21, 2021 11:03 pm ET
by The Rules of Philippines
Since you are Satan
That means you are the king, right?
You ought to be glad.
Haiku # 72107, September 21, 2021 8:27 pm ET
by Beelzebub's Brother-in-law of Gehenna
Global governance
is okay if I'm the king.
Else I would say no.

But I would like a world where the borders are.... less bordery.
Know what I mean?
Haiku # 72106, September 21, 2021 5:49 pm ET
by Easier to get drugs and go whoring.
Global governance
is okay if I'm the king.
Else I would say no.

But I would like a world where the borders are.... less bordery.
Know what I mean?
Haiku # 72105, September 21, 2021 5:49 pm ET
by Easier to get drugs and go whoring.
It's no. Just say "no".
No to global governance.
It's so easy ! "NO".
Haiku # 72103, September 21, 2021 12:34 pm ET
by Klaus Schwab's Mutti of Nein, mein liebchen
I need a sandwich.
I mean a turkey gut bomb.
Fills me up all day.
Haiku # 72101, September 21, 2021 6:45 am ET
by Not many turkeys here. :-(
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