Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
28 Years, 27 Days and 77408 Haiku later...

MyKelsey Online
Put on hold with Claire de Lune
I hung up on them
Haiku # 75209, April 3, 2022 6:41 pm ET
by Cyan is on the phone with one of the nurses, supposedly
Yes! Haiku is BACK.
Let's make haiku GREAT again.
Let's make it fascist.
Haiku # 75208, April 3, 2022 2:05 pm ET
by Benito Hitler of The Poetic Sphere
Exploding Tardis
Sugar sweet lipstick stains
Female doctor Hot
Haiku # 75207, April 3, 2022 10:57 am ET
by Cyanie of Here and now
what is invasion?
plums in a bowl of oranges?
tranny in the pool?
Haiku # 75206, April 3, 2022 8:28 am ET
by hi mom of mom's mom
I am the new Darth
He won't come here anymore
So I take his place
Haiku # 75205, April 3, 2022 2:52 am ET
by Pervert Dinosaur
Once, a failed ass-clown
Pondered long and hard in verse
Then birthed a haiku.
Haiku # 75203, March 30, 2022 9:43 am ET
by But It Died Immediately of Sudden Haiku Death Syndrome (S.H.D.S)
You cheated on me
with bad haiku poetry
and math equations
Haiku # 75193, March 26, 2022 6:40 pm ET
by One of Darth's bevy of beauties
I want a pizza
Anchovies and pineapple
I hate all the things!
Haiku # 75190, March 25, 2022 12:11 pm ET
by Pervert Dinosaur
Spwing is in the air!
Wed wobbins are fwiying fwee!
Darth shall soon be wed.
Haiku # 75188, March 24, 2022 9:42 pm ET
by As in Married, not the Color
Y'all got strange ritin'.
Looks like Greek wrote all backwords.
Y'all should rite
INGLISH.
Haiku # 75186, March 24, 2022 2:43 pm ET
by Vladameer Takeout of Hickry Holler, Ozarks
putin seeks "social
justice" to "denazify ukraine...."
left freaks the fuck out
Haiku # 75178, March 23, 2022 5:51 pm ET
by revealing true colors of rainbow nazis are the worst
Invasion failure
Putin is total ass clown
His days are numbered
Haiku # 75176, March 23, 2022 1:29 pm ET
by We gonna remember him as a tool
Previous post flagged.
It are not in haiku form.
Please to obey rule.
Haiku # 75175, March 23, 2022 6:19 am ET
by 575 Support Brigade of Haiku Enforcement
For past 4 yrs.
Yeah
So in your opinion, the best thing is.... what?
To help them cope.
Haiku # 75174, March 22, 2022 8:55 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Hey, Darth Figpucker
Did you ever fall asleep
in a dry bathtub?
Haiku # 75173, March 22, 2022 4:42 am ET
by Drained of Hope
Everyone lined up
and farted in unison
just like the Rockettes
Haiku # 75172, March 22, 2022 4:36 am ET
by Choreographer of High
I stepped carefully
but my boots were caked with it
Steaming, fresh haiku
Haiku # 75171, March 22, 2022 4:32 am ET
by Imprint of Size 10 work boot Encino, CA
I've always loved Darth
Up here in these tree branches
Since the dawn of time
Haiku # 75169, March 22, 2022 1:31 am ET
by Stink Beak of Old Willow
The haiku are wrong
when you confuse hate with God.
And that's about it.
Haiku # 75168, March 21, 2022 5:16 pm ET
by Hate tears you down. Makes you lose control. of Don't let it ruin you.
It's called comfort room.
But it's not comfortable.
No seat, tank or wipes.

Just bowl and water.
Efficiency at its best.
The green way to go.
Haiku # 75167, March 21, 2022 12:45 pm ET
by 'Mericuns are so wasteful. of Now the poles are melting. Learn to swim.
Dear Lord, please bless Darth.
He's such a pitiful soul
He needs your sweet love.
Haiku # 75166, March 21, 2022 9:37 am ET
by Your Old Aunt Mary of Rockin' on ma Front Porch
The Bible is wrong.
Believing in God is Hate.
All prayer is a crime.
Haiku # 75165, March 21, 2022 9:23 am ET
by A Progressive Perspective of Etcetera, etcetera Inc.
That one crazy twin
Hit herself with Thor's hammer
And became famous.
Haiku # 75164, March 21, 2022 9:16 am ET
by But For Wrong Reasons of UPPSALA
Hey Dexon, bite me.
Cheats, hacks, scripts, bugs and glitches
Aren't my cup of tea.
Haiku # 75163, March 21, 2022 9:14 am ET
by Dexon Bit of Get It?
Swedish meatballs stew
Hot twins made a meal of you
(with no leftovers)
Haiku # 75162, March 21, 2022 8:58 am ET
by Say Lou Lou of Ikea
Crazy Swedish twins.
Madness on the Motorway.
La folie a deux.
Haiku # 75160, March 21, 2022 7:23 am ET
by Ursula of Sabena
Fart introduction...
Are haiku belong to you?
Up your bathroom hole
Haiku # 75159, March 21, 2022 4:01 am ET
by Clean up in aisle 9 of Stink
Balot.
Haiku # 75158, March 20, 2022 11:48 pm ET
by Can we just give the site back to the real poets. of Your hate is tearing you down. Just send it to me.
Let's just settle it
Balut egg eating contest
The winner gets the runs
Haiku # 75157, March 20, 2022 11:44 pm ET
by Rhapsody in Balut of Restroom
Parallel timeline:
Ukraine invaded because
They're mostly unvaxxed
Haiku # 75156, March 20, 2022 10:42 pm ET
by Media fawns over Putin
Tossing and turning:
Who told all the foreigners
About bad haiku?
Haiku # 75155, March 20, 2022 10:38 pm ET
by Why have you done this?
I have seen your power to destroy and it is awesome. I have seen Christ's power. There is no forgiveness for the evil one. You must destroy it. The push of a button.
Haiku # 75154, March 20, 2022 10:32 pm ET
by Come in here, dear boy, have a cigar.
gross
Haiku # 75153, March 20, 2022 9:10 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Christ has all power.
I myself have no power.
Go smoke a cigar.
Haiku # 75152, March 20, 2022 5:50 pm ET
by C.A.O. Granada of Map of Nicaragua Inside Band
Take my life and destroy the evil one.
You have the power.
Haiku # 75151, March 20, 2022 3:57 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
This is not living.
Self-loathing: all that I've known.
As expected. End.
Haiku # 75150, March 20, 2022 3:11 pm ET
by Haikuized 4 You of U Owe Me Big Time
How do you call this living? I have destroyed everything I cared about. Self-loathing all I have ever known. It is exactly as expected.
Haiku # 75149, March 20, 2022 2:39 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Well hey there Russia
How's the invasion going?
Not like you planned eh?
Haiku # 75148, March 20, 2022 12:00 pm ET
by The World
So stunning and brave:
Some man thinks he's a woman.
Give that queen a crown!
Haiku # 75146, March 19, 2022 11:20 pm ET
by Keen of Quing
Well whut the Sam Hill--
I just found me a haiku...
right here in this box.
Haiku # 75145, March 19, 2022 9:33 pm ET
by Discoverer of Fool's Gold
Carry on, old bird...
Your beak smells so fantastic.
You eat carrion.
Haiku # 75144, March 19, 2022 7:07 pm ET
by Haiku Fowl of Culture Vulture
I have been living
in the branches of a tree
since the dawn of time
Haiku # 75143, March 19, 2022 1:28 am ET
by Stink Beak of Old Willow
Banana cream pie
Newest flavor of pop tarts
OMG they're good
Haiku # 75142, March 18, 2022 5:56 pm ET
by Shirley Smothers
Cheats, hacks, scripts, roblox.
Armenian genocide.
Dexon Bit, Ukraine.
Haiku # 75141, March 18, 2022 8:04 am ET
by See, I Haikuized For You of Pay Me Later
Your cloaca smells
Tried shoving mothballs up there?
It smells like old times
Haiku # 75139, March 18, 2022 12:23 am ET
by Extinction of Stink
If it's waxed or not
I'll violate your hippo
That IS my business
Haiku # 75138, March 17, 2022 10:44 pm ET
by Pervert Dinosaur
The world is the same
As it has forever been:
Wars, rumors of wars . . .
Haiku # 75135, March 17, 2022 5:19 pm ET
by Abomination of Desolation
End of discussions:
Always blame it on Russians.
(Swift repercussions).
Haiku # 75134, March 17, 2022 5:10 pm ET
by Hydra Onion of Minsk
Am I vaxed or Not?
Don't violate my hippa
None of you business
Haiku # 75132, March 17, 2022 1:54 pm ET
by Deplorable
I will lead the charge!
Haiku battalions, THIS WAY!
Haiku for Ukraine!
Haiku # 75130, March 17, 2022 6:25 am ET
by Putin Bad of Zelensky Good
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