relentless homework
want to drop out so so bad
May where are you at?

oh! for some more sleep
lucky that baby is cute
or i'd strangle him

if years can be "gone"
isn't it quite strange how they
manage to "add up"

here's a dumb riddle:
what's brown and sticky? a stick!
i said it was dumb

so hard not to gaze
at all the bumming one sees
at the nudist beach

never lost for words
pesky telemarketers
relentlessly speak

I am lost for words...
wondering what to say...
my cousin gazes
bumming for rides

Under flickering
florescent, brainless job in
LA, land of glitz

Laying on the couch
My Belly oozes over
Can't reach the remote

Closing in on my
one-five-two tri-mester, can
walk, talk....still urps though.

Hey, Betty la Bomb
Missed you, Missouri, and a
lack of pretension

another year gone
almost my birthday again
life goes by quite fast

san francisco has
many fun places to have
a drink with Janis....

spent a week on the
north umpqua river...quite wet
grandma has a cock

from the sweet child's mouth
a great swarm of shrieking bats
a black cloud boiling

summers' eve won't help
she should try hot kerosene
grandma has a cock

my cock is throbbing
thinking about all that yeast
we could make some beer

it's all good they say
art in any way
so what is the point of trying
art is crap

it's all good they say
art in any way
so what is the point of trying
art is crap

Sweat beads on her brow
Dough she is kneading needs yeast
Scratches her panties

Where do the farts go?
When silence must be observed
Riding on the lift

Imperious lass
Accused of farting gives me
An icy cold stare

bedded him at last
surprised...tiny equipment
unfortunately

Saw her Saturday
Liked the equipment so much
Now plays for that team.

just because it's fall
doesn't mean we're over (yet)
summer love does end

fwoar
that's the last time
no more

oh peenerschnitzels
cockamathingajiggers
unpredictable

c'mon Patriots!
first half...down by sixteen points!
I hate the Dolphins!

In hanging over
seven gin and tonics prove
cheap at twice the price

October's summer
could really do without all
this humidity

wife told me to just
restrain myself, then the fart
dissolves into you

once, in the morning
she left a cheek flapper loose
she won't admit it

4-29-05
Date of the Great Female Left-
Cheek Sneak...You've been warned!

there is a shade of nirvana
when the spirit is on the road
but there is but a semblance...

women never fart
so where does all their gas go
my wife won't tell me

women need to fart,
louder, and with enjoyment,
then, life is a gas!

without those laces
and with eyes up skirts, of course
your tongues hanging out

shoes also have eyes,
look out you women in skirts,
my shoes aren't tight laced :o

what about grammy's
home baked chicken pot pie? It's
goodness I say, good.

Eminem, whom once
again has sold his soul for
another grammy

grammy has a cock
so don't go liftin' her skirt
'lest you want a shock

Flooding all over
the Western United States --
broken Canada

beyond scarecrow's reach
twisted hinges creaking wind
fading V of geese

grasses of summer
now cooling winds barest touch
once green now shivers

all that men have built
the wind can so easily
blow it all away

I think my Grammy's
advice on a long life still
works "NAKED BINGO"

Decided to go
With a tableless design
('cept for haiku loop)

Gave up supporting
All those 5 year old browsers
Because they are fucked

bad haiku in the
netscrape browser is really
quite something to see

how could shoes smell bad?
they have no noses, just tongues
so they could taste bad