My right hand is grown
so big by masturbation.
Lefty gets lonely.
*
Typing a haiku
single-handedly tonight.
Lefty gets lucky.

Something stirs below.
The worm feasts in the graveyard.
I come in my pants.

Russian shotgun
Cheaper than Berreta, no?
God I love it so

Analyze me? Ha!
Just remember this: your wife
might have gobbled this

last was mine as well
you know that by now. Compete?
Hardly. Words fail you all

Russian brides want out
their soulful faces call: pick me
broken English ball

firetruck blazes by
howling dogs' throats point skyward
last Haiku? mine, dude

pretty Memphis belle
she lured me; made life hell
miss her now I do

so she thinks I lied
Always truer than she: I
babbling ignored

more mords to sulk by
I assure world destruction
even bleary eyed

watching our world fail
i silently contemplate
while laughing inside

Haikus tell stories
listen to events described
some are pathetic

psycho ex can stalk
bitch wants one more ride, no dice
thinks crying moves me

crawling from the womb
ever wanting right back in
all your Haikus trash

submissive begs, pleads
no Master! Crop smacks her thigh
her wetness runs down

these come so easily
you try to outdo, but fail
observe me, lightweights

intoxication
fishy smell, hands clenching hair
Lord give me some air!

Raise your head, raise your
feet, smoke a generous bowl
and beat your meat

eighteen she told me
cop's flashlight as she fellated
jury: rot bastard

Help! I have fallen
and I cannot get up! I
am having chest pain!

Made in God

Beneath my thrusting,
a body expels dead air,
then the pelvis cracks.

guy before me buys
cheetos, a toothbrush, and lube
Walgreens... 1 AM

My wake disturbs space,
with bright vector distruction,
Geometry Wars

Could I be so blind?
to not realize it's back..
so it begins... again.

have lots of piercing
my favourite one is known as
"Prince Albert" piercing
(not part of the poem, but the piercing is at the
scrotum, ball sac)

clear turban milk
it makes baby and tastes good
it's indian semen

Grinning and drooling,
arm in up to the shoulder.
The vet fists a cow.

The big tongue flexes.
So taut, it shoots out and pins
a fly to the wall.

Asleep in the park,
a squirrel hiding my nuts.
My pouch is empty.
:-(
O where are they hid?
So much digging and weeping
before winter comes.

I sit on your face.
Does my ass look big in this?
Keep talking mister.

Teeth cannot retain.
Rolls out and falls to the floor
with a fleshy thud.

tight, loose, shallow, deep
painful, but pleasurous
o shit, it's fuckin stuck

I thought you ate cheese
Guess you lied, guess i was wrong
Now you can't have this

I thought you ate cheese
Guess you lied, guess i was wrong
Now you can't have this

dick erecting
sperm in semen jacking
baby coming

it's been four long days
i've been several thousand miles
and a few decades

Swinging from a tree.
Just one more banana please.
Scratching my arm pit.

Ode to my Boss...

A tyrant is she
Strutting like SS soldier
Memories of home...

I do recommend
Putting a dash of radish
In tuna salad

i can't believe it
my haiku lover is back
i have missed you so.

"When I wake up in
the morning and the alarm
gives off its warning..."

"When I wake up in
the morning and the alarm
gives off its warning..."

I'm behind the times
Sweet succulent haiku teat
I missed your sweet milk

Yes! Haikus are back
Just realizing this now
Invigorating

My legs probe her thighs
Gasping, body stroking madness
Hot grinding embrace

Old heart breaks in two
I

Her tempting body
Joy calls under a blanket
Playing lovers laugh

Death to everyone
Satan

He may be ill, but
Better than alternative
Laughing good for you