Bashō says something unhelpful
Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
29 Years, 55 Days and 78007 Haiku later...
This site had a troll
From '03-'17
I will outlast you
Haiku # 73616 November 15, 2021 9:55 am ET
by Janis of That must be a record!
usually when it's
about me dying i might
take it personal.
Haiku # 73615 November 15, 2021 9:44 am ET
by vhs
dude, it's stuff like that
that made me leave here and stop
posting haiku here.
Haiku # 73614 November 15, 2021 9:43 am ET
by vhs
Mox stocks rocks fox pox.
It put him in a pine box.
Bagels, cream cheese, lox.
Haiku # 73613 November 15, 2021 9:29 am ET
by I am not Sam. I will eat green eggs and ham. of It's Ma'am! (I notice you assume to much.)
well this is a drat
a bother, shows how old we
are facebook a dream
Haiku # 73612 November 15, 2021 8:47 am ET
by vhs of im usually mox too
300 hits to this site each day.
297 are bots.
1 is Janis trying to delete the bot spam.
The others are the only 2 poets posting here under multiple names pretending to be different people.
Haiku # 73611 November 15, 2021 7:15 am ET
by Good job!
If the Axis won,
I bet there'd be no balot
in the Philippines.
Haiku # 73610 November 15, 2021 7:08 am ET
by Even the Nippers aren't that nasty.
Thunderbird, Night Train,
Mad Dog Twenty-Twenty.
Brand name, not vintage.

Vintage ghetto wine.
Now THAT is fucking funny.
Pairs with Velveeta.
Haiku # 73609 November 15, 2021 6:57 am ET
by I Noticed your yellow lips. of OH! That's from crack. Okay.
If the Axis won,
these Russian boner pill ads
could well be poo porn.
Haiku # 73608 November 15, 2021 6:52 am ET
by Things could always be worse.
Beaujolais red wine.
Two-thousand-fifteen is good.
Pairs well with hookers.

And sharp cheddar.
Haiku # 73607 November 15, 2021 6:48 am ET
by Right!
Germany/Japan.
They make the disgusting porn
US frat boy watch.
Haiku # 73605 November 15, 2021 6:42 am ET
by $upply & demand.
Okay, let's talk wine.
That's way more appropriate.
What's your favorite?
Haiku # 73604 November 15, 2021 6:39 am ET
by What's a famous Jewish wine? of "I want to go to Hawaii!"... Oh, I thought you said whine.
I cannot fathom
enjoying being pooed on.
Explain Noticer.
Haiku # 73603 November 15, 2021 6:36 am ET
by What's that do for you?
The sewers are fun.
Did you notice me in the
toilet hole waiting.
Haiku # 73602 November 15, 2021 6:33 am ET
by Oh, wait, no... that's Germany. Maybe Japan. of Why are the WWII axis powers such epic perverts?
He brewed a bad brew
of Hebrew Manischewitz.
Man, it was the shits.
Haiku # 73601 November 15, 2021 6:29 am ET
by vhs... NOT of ;-)
A knock at the door
A single knock followed by
sixteen rapid knocks
Haiku # 73600 November 15, 2021 2:42 am ET
by Salesman of Haiku
Haiku supply chain
The source of all bad haiku
Philippines sewers
Haiku # 73599 November 15, 2021 1:48 am ET
by Eel of Sargasso (source of good haiku)
Just write what you know
Poems about cutting cheese
and blaming the dog
Haiku # 73598 November 15, 2021 1:32 am ET
by Hound of Limburger
I had idea
For epic haiku poem...
But it was garbage.
Haiku # 73597 November 15, 2021 12:04 am ET
by Flash in the Pan
Moxie is a brew.
But is he a hebrew brew?
Or a mere beverage?
Haiku # 73596 November 14, 2021 11:42 pm ET
by Israel of God
Kill the red heifer.
The levitical priesthood.
The law of Moses.
Haiku # 73595 November 14, 2021 11:36 pm ET
by Sodom and Egypt of Revelation
Oy veh.. Yom Kippur.
Gefilte fish and matzoh.
Wait for third temple.
Haiku # 73594 November 14, 2021 11:31 pm ET
by The Rebbe of Mendel Schneerson
Ah yeah Darth this Darth
That. ...keep firing assholes, a
Drewish princess? Oi.
Haiku # 73593 November 14, 2021 11:06 pm ET
by Vhs
Darth is a drag queen
Hiding out in Phillipeen.
To hell with his soul.
Haiku # 73592 November 14, 2021 10:47 pm ET
by Unconditional Love of Jeeeebus
Hey Darth: eat your sperm.
We are so tired of you.
Go jerk off again.
Haiku # 73591 November 14, 2021 10:06 pm ET
by Into your Sea Monkees tank of Yaaaawwwnnnn....
his last day of life
was spent in our back garden
watching bees at work
Haiku # 73589 November 14, 2021 7:28 pm ET
by scotch of missing someone fuzzy
Ejaculation
discreetly shipped to your door
in a cardboard box
Haiku # 73588 November 14, 2021 7:17 pm ET
by Jeff Bezos of If it fits, it ships
Thunderbirds are GO!
I used to live for that show.
Don't know Thundercats..
Haiku # 73587 November 14, 2021 1:31 pm ET
by Mummra's Scoutmaster of Gay Olde Time
Indonesian trash:
We took a big load right there.
(Our little servers)
Haiku # 73586 November 14, 2021 1:15 pm ET
by Java Junk of Jakartit Away
Dehydrated jizz
Packaged like cup-o- noodles
without the noodles
Haiku # 73583 November 14, 2021 12:43 pm ET
by Alexa of Sea monkeys jizz factor
If we get famous,
can your little servers take
a big load like that?
Haiku # 73582 November 14, 2021 12:10 pm ET
by Soon I think. Within 3 months.
Much in the same way
we destroyed the Amazon,
it's destroying us.
Haiku # 73581 November 14, 2021 12:07 pm ET
by Oh good! My order of Sea Monkey jizz extract just arrived!
I think Jeff Bezos
is buying up Hawaii.
So, yeah, possible.
Haiku # 73580 November 14, 2021 10:25 am ET
by What would you do if you owned the world? of Start a pandemic?
Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know.
Every is TWO syllables.
Don't say "ever-ree".
Haiku # 73579 November 14, 2021 10:23 am ET
by Webster's plaid pants.
fantasy island
i wonder if anyone
asked the caretaker

my fantasy is
to have an island like yours
can you do this sir?
Haiku # 73578 November 14, 2021 10:21 am ET
by vhs of ze plane ze plane!
Scooby Doo is dumb.
Same effing plot every week.
But I'd bang Velma.
Haiku # 73577 November 14, 2021 10:18 am ET
by Right.
"Thundercats!" (times three).
Mummra's homosexual;
still in the closet.
Haiku # 73576 November 14, 2021 10:15 am ET
by Not a very good villain if you ask me. of And such stupid minions.
Did you ever play
Conan the Barbarian;
chopped off your friend's head?
Haiku # 73575 November 14, 2021 10:11 am ET
by Oops! Sorry about little Caleb, Mrs. Davenport. of Sheepishly returning the machete to old Mr. Dixon's tool shed.
Not one mention of
Dr. Who and his tardis
on this whole damn site!
Haiku # 73574 November 14, 2021 10:05 am ET
by ... Just what the hell is a "police box" anyway?!
Back to the Sleestaks.
What if they owned sea monkeys!
What a team they'd make!
Haiku # 73573 November 14, 2021 10:02 am ET
by Bipedal reptiles and brine shrimp overlords! of Better leaders than current world government.
Do you think they'll eat
Thanksgiving dinner if I
put it in their tank?
Haiku # 73572 November 14, 2021 9:58 am ET
by Don't forget the potato salad! of And pumpkin pie.
Sea monkeys are whores.
Pimped out anonymously
by the Jacques Cousteau.
Haiku # 73571 November 14, 2021 9:56 am ET
by I have proof! Bank records! Cashed checks!
I've never seen a
sea monkey spank his monkey
even for money.
Haiku # 73570 November 14, 2021 8:13 am ET
by Magnifying glass obsessions. of Scientific observation, hypothesis, law, theory.
Did you ever wank
to sea monkey comic ads?
The queen's pretty hot.
Haiku # 73569 November 14, 2021 8:04 am ET
by Ain't she though! of https://www.adsoftheworld.com/media/print/the_amazing_live_seamonkeys_legs
Sleestaks are sexy.
You know you've thought about it.
Bang some reptile strange.
Haiku # 73568 November 14, 2021 7:55 am ET
by Saturday morning couch stains.
You must remember!
You are NOT a sea monkey.
You don't belong there.
Haiku # 73567 November 14, 2021 7:49 am ET
by Stay away from that shrink ray!
I've never seen a
disappointed sea monkey.
They seem so happy.
Haiku # 73566 November 14, 2021 7:47 am ET
by In their little fish bowl kingdom.
YOU'RE the dinosaur
if you watched "Land of the Lost".
Roast your own penis.
Haiku # 73565 November 14, 2021 3:13 am ET
by Chef Mao Sugiyama of Tokyo
I love that one part.
Outside in the cold distance
a wildcat did growl.
Haiku # 73564 November 14, 2021 3:08 am ET
by Two riders were approaching.
Which do you like more,
Hey Joe or The Watchtower?
I'm thinking Hey Joe.
Haiku # 73563 November 14, 2021 3:01 am ET
by Decisions
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