Hair Removal Kit
said not to use on my balls
now my crotch is bald

I have no pubes now
My nuts look like mister clean
oh, how it itches!

So as Onan goes,
Such pleasure unfulfilling.
I choose pudendum!

I feel so privleged
just played a game with the lad
he came at his desk

thanked me profusely.
it was my pleasure, I said
It didn't take long

oh willing vessel
i/o device is a waste
spray my jizz on your??????

A sticky keyboard
implies great jizzing power.
What a man he is!!

he said he was a mess
and left abruptly to wash.
his keyboard's sticky

Shrill butt trumpet song
heralds my awakening.
Too much beer and beef.

this world was lucky
but don't get up gentlemen
bob dylan passed through

my master controls
every move that I make.
man, do I wriggle!

get you arse in gear
am expecting some cock-up
just come mate, come soon

Hey, you cannot cound?
You cannot even spell good.
But I love you still.

I am quite drunk.
Sorry for the last haiku.
I cannot cound.

Hurts when I pee.
I shoud not have poked those sheep.
Foot and mouth disease abounds.

Man, I've got the runs!
I ate some bad bacon, cause'
Grandma has a cock!

Camel toe surprise!
i sniff your stanky wu wu!
Many pisses here.

Terrible bad poems
Forged out sick and strange minds
God I love this page!

come come my lady
i make your legs shake, you make
granny have a cow

Post your bad haiku
While i chase my withered balls
Wife ordered pizza

We sit and wait here
where is the creative man
chasing balls somewhere

THE DAY NOT YET DONE
I PICK MY ASS IN TORMENT
HEIDI LOVES ARLEN

Fresh wind fill my sail,
set course for the North horizon.
Grandma has a cock!

Got first date jitters
Better not get fookin drunk
DOH! Maybe next time.

Cthulu I am...
I have clained that name before
Crawling chaos NOW!

holy hell i'm bored
want to shoot the dj she's
just not punk as fuck

Yeah!

What kind of cock and
ball story is this any-
way? (Bad Haiku form?)

Cocks? Balls? Explosion?
Viagra is good but...
It should be used responsibly!
Yeah!

On Santa's big lap
My scrotum goes POP! My balls
Are gathered by elves

Stand straight, if you can
hauling that gargantuan
testicle about...

I'm no kidding, LOOK!
It's like sputnik: spherical,
but pointy in parts.

Towels will not help
but i need a new scrotum
this one is wrinkled.

Granny's Raisin Bread

two cups ass raisins
mix well with fresh crusty bread
stir with granny's cock

POW! You know the sound...
Ask Santa for new scrotum
And maybe some towels.

Granny's Ass Gravy

five large chalupa
six bottles of corona
mix with granny's cock

Granny's Ass Gravy

five large chalupa
six bottles of corona
mix with granny's cock

HEY BOB! We've replaced
your left testicle with new
Folger's Brand Coffee!

Cock catastrophe!
Penile implant explosion!
Whoa! Are those my balls?

No inspiration.
Depressing ass gravey flow.
Do not waste that food!

Granny's biscuit huh?
Where does she get the yeast to
make such a fine treat?

granny has a cock
and now a giant biscuit
deep within our Saint

sleeves up, I plunge in
fisting the butt gravy font
with granny's biscuit

Clenching buttocks push
First giant air biscuit then
ass gravy follows

terrorists would 'jack
Saint's plane to kidnap his ass
They would be sorry...

before Saint can go
to Australia we must
warn them of his ass

Solace, my happy friend
I am buried in shit now
Why bother at death?

Try the gay Steward.
He will fasten your seat belt.
Make you smile all day!

Long flight, eighteen hours
or more. need very good reason
to go. Any ideas?