Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
27 Years, 188 Days and 77102 Haiku later...

Where to eat tonight....
"I don't know,what do you want?"
"No, what do you want?"
Haiku # 986, December 30, 1998 11:05 am ET
by Stephy! of Loves Park, USA
Snoots eats cheese wedges
Because he's a little rat!
He's so cute! Yippee!
Haiku # 985, December 30, 1998 11:02 am ET
by Stephy! of Loves Park, USA
Large, malignant warts
Cover my grotesque body
I like to eat them.
Haiku # 984, December 30, 1998 10:56 am ET
by Stephy! of Loves Park, USA
killing mosquitoes
is that misogynistic?
only the girls bite
Haiku # 983, December 30, 1998 6:52 am ET
by ashley of Oz
addle my neurones
o delicious dacquiri
but no bed spins please
Haiku # 982, December 30, 1998 6:47 am ET
by ashley of Oz
Is this a joke Frank?
A kangaroo chia pet?
This present sucks ass
Haiku # 981, December 29, 1998 4:05 am ET
by AHHT
unavoidable
the hirsute of pappy-ness
ear and nostril hairs
Haiku # 980, December 28, 1998 6:21 am ET
by ashley of Oz
the postal worker
brings cheese and fancy mayo
with some dead crackers
Haiku # 979, December 26, 1998 4:06 am ET
by deeders of marietta, us
so glad its over
says the four leaf clover
Haiku # 978, December 25, 1998 2:51 pm ET
by Tag of LA, USA
A. and A. of Hai
Ku fame, Is you is or is
you ain't my babies?
Haiku # 977, December 24, 1998 1:50 pm ET
by Donkey Hotee of Brooklyn, U.S.A.
Quantum mechanics
Whattsa matter? Can't grasp math?
Abacus, fuckface.
Haiku # 976, December 24, 1998 1:45 pm ET
by Ed Zealot of Brooklyn, U.S.A.
Donkey wriggles. What?
Oh, halibut's thrombosis
Dead river jackass
Haiku # 975, December 24, 1998 1:39 pm ET
by Dr. Porpoise of Brooklyn, U.S.A.
Soon, soon my birthday
Unite. Unite Capricorns!
With me and JESUS!!
Haiku # 974, December 24, 1998 1:33 pm ET
by Steve Fabulous of Brooklyn, U.S.A.
One eye brow raised, the
snotty waiter condescends:
"Are these your pants, sir?"

Haiku # 973, December 24, 1998 9:56 am ET
by Eddie Futch
You're entertaining,
unabashed, lewd, crude (tattooed?)
Merry X-mas all
Haiku # 972, December 24, 1998 2:24 am ET
by L. D. A. of Cloverdale, U. S. A.
Boy! Did I ever
trash that last haiku
But I'msadder Budweiser
Haiku # 971, December 24, 1998 2:21 am ET
by L. D. A. of Cloverdale, U. S. A.
You're entertaining,
lewd, crude, rude,(tattooed?)
Merry X-mas all
Haiku # 970, December 24, 1998 1:57 am ET
by L. D. A. of Cloverdale, U. S. A.
come here, little gal
wriggle into Santa's lap
there's a gift for you
Haiku # 969, December 23, 1998 9:17 pm ET
by Kadiz
come here, little gal
sit in Santa's cozy lap
I've a gift for you.
Haiku # 968, December 23, 1998 8:43 pm ET
by Kadiz
wonder if xmas
is that mas i used to know
before it left me?
Haiku # 967, December 23, 1998 6:57 pm ET
by ashley of Oz
Kiwi Soup Goddess
Barrel of potatoe grass
figure it out yourself
Haiku # 966, December 23, 1998 6:55 pm ET
by Marc of St. John's, Canada
Drinking Brill Cream
Has To be very contagious
Teddy Ruxpin has chicken legs
Haiku # 965, December 23, 1998 6:54 pm ET
by Marc of St. John's, Canada
a merry christmas
and a happy new year too
my fellow poets
Haiku # 964, December 23, 1998 6:53 pm ET
by ashley of Oz
go through ear, stab brain
three-tined fork, keep gauze handy
jagged lights, seizure
Haiku # 963, December 23, 1998 1:39 pm ET
by Hollywood Bonfire
Happy holidays
To those whose bad haikus made
Me bleed from the ears.
Haiku # 962, December 23, 1998 12:25 pm ET
by Reverend Jim of London, UK
Hmmm. As I scroll down
I notice that they follow.
Maybe the trailing?
Haiku # 961, December 23, 1998 9:39 am ET
by Kadiz
Kadiz, didn't you
mean the previous haikus
Not the following?
Haiku # 960, December 23, 1998 3:19 am ET
by AHHT
An anagram for
Monica Lewinsky is
"A lick wins money"
Haiku # 959, December 22, 1998 6:51 pm ET
by AHHT
Work before Christmas?
Cocks. Great big swollen purple
Horses' cocks on sticks.
Haiku # 958, December 22, 1998 12:29 pm ET
by Reverend Jim of London, UK
the following two
by ashley and Rev'rend Jim
are really quite good
Haiku # 957, December 22, 1998 10:16 am ET
by Kadiz
from herein i guess
things go down in history
like a lewinski
Haiku # 956, December 22, 1998 6:44 am ET
by ashley oz
Why so evasive
Mr President? Maybe
You should have come clean.
Haiku # 955, December 22, 1998 5:27 am ET
by Reverend Jim of London, UK
They ask: "What evil
Lurks in the hearts of men?" This
Your drycleaner knows.
Haiku # 954, December 22, 1998 5:25 am ET
by Reverend Jim of London, UK
Lie, even perjure
Himself over Monica?
Nice euphemism.
Haiku # 953, December 22, 1998 5:09 am ET
by Reverend Jim of London, Terra Incognita
even tinier
threw a saddle on a louse
rode him through your pubes
Haiku # 952, December 22, 1998 12:30 am ET
by Kadiz
Hallucination?
Snowing in San Francisco.
Really. I saw it.
Haiku # 951, December 21, 1998 7:26 pm ET
by Dr. Don
nostrils ebb and flow
the drip, drip, drip, of mucus
it's sinus rhythm
Haiku # 950, December 21, 1998 6:51 pm ET
by ashley of Oz
dreamt I was tiny
had a saddle for my cat
rode him through the woods
Haiku # 949, December 21, 1998 2:43 pm ET
by Hollywood Bonfire
most men become rou
Haiku # 948, December 21, 1998 8:58 am ET
by Kadiz
a sexual deed
a dalliance, nothing more
a justified lie
Haiku # 947, December 21, 1998 8:37 am ET
by Kadiz
a blow to the head
was not the president's crime
'twas his denial
Haiku # 946, December 21, 1998 2:22 am ET
by ashley of Oz
poetic justice
first you get to taste peaches
and then inpeachment
Haiku # 945, December 21, 1998 2:16 am ET
by ashley of Oz
President impeached
At the taxpayer's expense
K. Starr should be shot
Haiku # 944, December 20, 1998 7:30 pm ET
by AHHT
that goo on her dress
should have been the only mess
that came from her mouth
Haiku # 943, December 20, 1998 6:37 pm ET
by Kadiz
It's all crapola
A purjury indictment
over a blow job?
Haiku # 942, December 19, 1998 12:49 pm ET
by Nunya Bidness
Not too old to stay
In touch with my inner slut
making geezer porn
Haiku # 941, December 19, 1998 12:44 pm ET
by Nunya Bidness
art art art finance
finance finance what
the Hell possessed me?
Haiku # 940, December 19, 1998 12:43 pm ET
by Skubrick of London, Engerland
People who can't spell
"purjure", like Paula Keller,
shouldn't have opinions.
Haiku # 939, December 19, 1998 12:37 pm ET
by Nunya Bidness
art art art finance
finance finance what
the Hell possessed me?
Haiku # 938, December 19, 1998 12:34 pm ET
by Skubrick of London, Engerland
Art art art finance
finance finance what
the Hell possessed me?
Haiku # 937, December 19, 1998 12:29 pm ET
by Skubrick of London, Engerland
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