Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
27 Years, 136 Days and 76970 Haiku later...

don't be so, nasty!
the only flame needed here
is that old bonfire
Haiku # 1124, January 29, 1999 2:34 am ET
by ashley of Oz
a jack in a box
will be worth two in the hand
hang on hollywood
Haiku # 1123, January 29, 1999 2:17 am ET
by ashley of Oz
fluffy cute kitttens
black velvet Elvis paintings
i puke in the sink
Haiku # 1122, January 29, 1999 2:10 am ET
by oldashty
that Bonfire person
twice now has shown us his spunk
jacking off wildly
Haiku # 1121, January 29, 1999 12:32 am ET
by squish
I like to be by
myself in my apartment
alone with sauerkraut
Haiku # 1120, January 29, 1999 12:20 am ET
by Thunder Stork of Arcata,
i was having fun
too bad you scrutinize the
content of bad poems
Haiku # 1119, January 28, 1999 7:20 pm ET
by oldnasty
the sun can't decide
blackbirds crowd the power lines
I jack off wildly
Haiku # 1118, January 28, 1999 2:38 pm ET
by Hollywood Bonfire
A hack, a cough, a
wheeze and a dank rotten queef.
The bitch must be back.
Haiku # 1117, January 28, 1999 12:01 pm ET
by Intern
source variety
not the same flavoured repeats
is the spice of life
Haiku # 1116, January 27, 1999 11:47 pm ET
by ashley of ox
i asked the nice man
for hypoallergenic
handcuffs and he laughed
Haiku # 1115, January 27, 1999 3:52 pm ET
by oldnasty
why oh why oh why
didnt my bad poems make it?
were they just too bad?
Haiku # 1114, January 27, 1999 2:35 pm ET
by oldnasty
sixteen men in jail
will attest that there is no
thing like manly love
Haiku # 1113, January 27, 1999 2:24 pm ET
by oldnasty
sometimes when I sneeze
objects fly out my nose and
hit my girlfriends face
Haiku # 1112, January 27, 1999 2:21 pm ET
by oldnasty
those damn chirping birds
are the true reason I dont
wash my car often
Haiku # 1111, January 27, 1999 2:17 pm ET
by oldnasty
dont ask me for change
it took me forty minutes
to collect my own
Haiku # 1110, January 27, 1999 2:13 pm ET
by oldnasty
the natives are drunk
the elders sing songs of love
later they'll shoot guns
Haiku # 1109, January 27, 1999 2:10 pm ET
by oldnasty
today we eat spam
I throw mine at the t.v.
it stick to the screen
Haiku # 1108, January 27, 1999 2:07 pm ET
by oldnasty
what is it with pigs?
Haiku # 1107, January 27, 1999 2:05 pm ET
by F
she told me she'd stay
then she stole my wallet
but not my bottle
Haiku # 1106, January 27, 1999 2:04 pm ET
by oldnasty
the evil of it
you suck me long time baby
i like cheezy poofs
Haiku # 1105, January 27, 1999 2:01 pm ET
by lugenius speed of eureka,
I crave indulgence
Of the other Haikuists.
Louise, send me mail!
Haiku # 1104, January 27, 1999 1:17 pm ET
by Reverend Jim
What's your beef, wise one?
Mad cows got you climbing walls?
Cow, you, who is who?
Haiku # 1103, January 27, 1999 1:14 pm ET
by Reverend Jim of GreatSatanVille, US
Oh Aussie Lao_Tse
Wisdom, like antipodean
Wine, ages badly.
Haiku # 1102, January 27, 1999 1:07 pm ET
by Reverend Jim of GreatSatanVille, US
Angel has a poop a pretty poop parade,
with lolypoops and caramel terds,
she's having a poop of a time
Haiku # 1101, January 27, 1999 10:59 am ET
by Redphish23 of Mason, United States
we're clean out of love
you tell me this, turn, and sleep
I jack off wildly
Haiku # 1100, January 27, 1999 10:27 am ET
by Hollywood Bonfire
nasal and ear hair
the hirsute of pappy-ness
'though not on my head
Haiku # 1099, January 27, 1999 10:10 am ET
by George of Sydney, Australia
I have visions of
A celebrity plane crash
Bye bye Jim Carrey
Haiku # 1098, January 26, 1999 6:59 pm ET
by AHHT
scadalous joey
thinks about the best of times
while sitting in jail
Haiku # 1097, January 26, 1999 4:51 pm ET
by oldnasty of arcata, usa
one more time i drink
the juice of fermenting grains
to deal with the wife
Haiku # 1096, January 26, 1999 4:49 pm ET
by oldnasty of arcata, usa
please get me away
from this goddamn plastic box
before i explode
Haiku # 1095, January 26, 1999 4:42 pm ET
by oldnasty of arcata, usa
my pasty fat gut
yearns for Hollywood's bright wit
to split it open
Haiku # 1094, January 26, 1999 4:40 pm ET
by oldnasty of arcata, usa
pop music plays on
i fondle my revolver
man in the box die!
Haiku # 1093, January 26, 1999 4:37 pm ET
by oldnasty of arcata, usa
university
officials are gathering
some nuts and berries
Haiku # 1092, January 26, 1999 4:35 pm ET
by oldnasty of arcata, usa
i'm no damn student
maybe that's why they asked me
to leave the campus
Haiku # 1091, January 26, 1999 4:32 pm ET
by oldnasty of arcata, usa
must stop this madness
thinking only in Haiku
need more syllables
Haiku # 1090, January 26, 1999 3:38 pm ET
by oldnasty of arcata, usa
My haiku is bad
like the wind from my ass
breaking away free
Haiku # 1089, January 26, 1999 3:36 pm ET
by oldnasty of arcata, usa
what a great outlet
this haiku stuff seems to be
i'm no poet
Haiku # 1088, January 26, 1999 3:33 pm ET
by oldnasty of arcata, usa
one banana two
Potassium's dark blue
My monkey's named lou
Haiku # 1087, January 26, 1999 3:30 pm ET
by oldnasty of arcata, usa
in a brief moment
i fear what my boss would say
too bad he's in Guam
Haiku # 1086, January 26, 1999 3:28 pm ET
by oldnasty of arcata, usa
Hollywood Bonfire
your talent brings me laughter
hats off to you sir
Haiku # 1085, January 26, 1999 3:24 pm ET
by oldnasty of arcata, usa
sometimes I feel bad
after drinking the last beer
I'll get over it
Haiku # 1084, January 26, 1999 3:22 pm ET
by oldnasty of arcata, usa
BLAHBLAH BLAH BLAHBLAH
BLAHBLAHBLAH
BLAH BLAHBLAHBLAH
BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH, huh?
Haiku # 1083, January 26, 1999 3:21 pm ET
by NOGEL GOOKIEBELMAR, JERSEYSHORE
I just ran over
Hiesenberg's cat in my car
I left him a note
Haiku # 1082, January 26, 1999 3:19 pm ET
by oldnasty of arcata, usa

>>


Haiku # 1081, January 26, 1999 3:14 pm ET
by oldnasty of arcata, humboldt



Haiku # 1080, January 26, 1999 3:12 pm ET
by oldnasty of arcata, humboldt
Got out of the wrong
side of the bed this morning:
Had to climb the wall.
Haiku # 1079, January 26, 1999 8:47 am ET
by Lao-Tse
Got out of the wrong
side of the bed this morning:
Had to climb the wall.
Haiku # 1078, January 26, 1999 8:18 am ET
by Lao-Tse
Oh toilet bowl, if
only I knew the music
the way I know you.
Haiku # 1077, January 25, 1999 8:33 am ET
by Lao-Tse
War with children huh?
How about poetry for
the illiterate?
Haiku # 1076, January 25, 1999 8:24 am ET
by Lao-TseLondon, England
as steroids to sport
i can tell the I.O.C. :
cash to committees
Haiku # 1075, January 25, 1999 12:20 am ET
by ashley of sid-i-nee, Oz