Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
29 Years, 78 Days and 78054 Haiku later...
Horrible poetry for the digital age
29 Years, 78 Days and 78054 Haiku later...
why oh why oh why
didnt my bad poems make it?
were they just too bad?
didnt my bad poems make it?
were they just too bad?
by
sixteen men in jail
will attest that there is no
thing like manly love
will attest that there is no
thing like manly love
by
sometimes when I sneeze
objects fly out my nose and
hit my girlfriends face
objects fly out my nose and
hit my girlfriends face
by
those damn chirping birds
are the true reason I dont
wash my car often
are the true reason I dont
wash my car often
by
dont ask me for change
it took me forty minutes
to collect my own
it took me forty minutes
to collect my own
by
the natives are drunk
the elders sing songs of love
later they'll shoot guns
the elders sing songs of love
later they'll shoot guns
by
today we eat spam
I throw mine at the t.v.
it stick to the screen
I throw mine at the t.v.
it stick to the screen
by
she told me she'd stay
then she stole my wallet
but not my bottle
then she stole my wallet
but not my bottle
by
the evil of it
you suck me long time baby
i like cheezy poofs
you suck me long time baby
i like cheezy poofs
by of eureka,
I crave indulgence
Of the other Haikuists.
Louise, send me mail!
Of the other Haikuists.
Louise, send me mail!
by
What's your beef, wise one?
Mad cows got you climbing walls?
Cow, you, who is who?
Mad cows got you climbing walls?
Cow, you, who is who?
by of GreatSatanVille, US
Oh Aussie Lao_Tse
Wisdom, like antipodean
Wine, ages badly.
Wisdom, like antipodean
Wine, ages badly.
by of GreatSatanVille, US
Angel has a poop a pretty poop parade,
with lolypoops and caramel terds,
she's having a poop of a time
with lolypoops and caramel terds,
she's having a poop of a time
by of Mason, United States
we're clean out of love
you tell me this, turn, and sleep
I jack off wildly
you tell me this, turn, and sleep
I jack off wildly
by
nasal and ear hair
the hirsute of pappy-ness
'though not on my head
the hirsute of pappy-ness
'though not on my head
by of Sydney, Australia
I have visions of
A celebrity plane crash
Bye bye Jim Carrey
A celebrity plane crash
Bye bye Jim Carrey
by
scadalous joey
thinks about the best of times
while sitting in jail
thinks about the best of times
while sitting in jail
by of arcata, usa
one more time i drink
the juice of fermenting grains
to deal with the wife
the juice of fermenting grains
to deal with the wife
by of arcata, usa
please get me away
from this goddamn plastic box
before i explode
from this goddamn plastic box
before i explode
by of arcata, usa
my pasty fat gut
yearns for Hollywood's bright wit
to split it open
yearns for Hollywood's bright wit
to split it open
by of arcata, usa
pop music plays on
i fondle my revolver
man in the box die!
i fondle my revolver
man in the box die!
by of arcata, usa
university
officials are gathering
some nuts and berries
officials are gathering
some nuts and berries
by of arcata, usa
i'm no damn student
maybe that's why they asked me
to leave the campus
maybe that's why they asked me
to leave the campus
by of arcata, usa
must stop this madness
thinking only in Haiku
need more syllables
thinking only in Haiku
need more syllables
by of arcata, usa
My haiku is bad
like the wind from my ass
breaking away free
like the wind from my ass
breaking away free
by of arcata, usa
what a great outlet
this haiku stuff seems to be
i'm no poet
this haiku stuff seems to be
i'm no poet
by of arcata, usa
one banana two
Potassium's dark blue
My monkey's named lou
Potassium's dark blue
My monkey's named lou
by of arcata, usa
in a brief moment
i fear what my boss would say
too bad he's in Guam
i fear what my boss would say
too bad he's in Guam
by of arcata, usa
Hollywood Bonfire
your talent brings me laughter
hats off to you sir
your talent brings me laughter
hats off to you sir
by of arcata, usa
sometimes I feel bad
after drinking the last beer
I'll get over it
after drinking the last beer
I'll get over it
by of arcata, usa
BLAHBLAH BLAH BLAHBLAH
BLAHBLAHBLAH
BLAH BLAHBLAHBLAH
BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH, huh?
BLAHBLAHBLAH
BLAH BLAHBLAHBLAH
BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH, huh?
by
I just ran over
Hiesenberg's cat in my car
I left him a note
Hiesenberg's cat in my car
I left him a note
by of arcata, usa
Got out of the wrong
side of the bed this morning:
Had to climb the wall.
side of the bed this morning:
Had to climb the wall.
by
Got out of the wrong
side of the bed this morning:
Had to climb the wall.
side of the bed this morning:
Had to climb the wall.
by
Oh toilet bowl, if
only I knew the music
the way I know you.
only I knew the music
the way I know you.
by
War with children huh?
How about poetry for
the illiterate?
How about poetry for
the illiterate?
by
as steroids to sport
i can tell the I.O.C. :
cash to committees
i can tell the I.O.C. :
cash to committees
by of sid-i-nee, Oz
so what do i care
if we differ by so much
it's all bad haiku
if we differ by so much
it's all bad haiku
by of Oz
a wise man was once
heard to say "Keep it real up
in the field, awwight?"
heard to say "Keep it real up
in the field, awwight?"
by
I'm back and it's war.
I can't leave you kids alone
For a minute! Tch!
I can't leave you kids alone
For a minute! Tch!
by
must ignore punkass
to create is to know god
kill him for me, god
to create is to know god
kill him for me, god
by
working at the zoo
all the frozen mice i want
with no questions asked
all the frozen mice i want
with no questions asked
by
news flash! pAHHThetic
little inbred monkey-boy
makes joke on purpose!
little inbred monkey-boy
makes joke on purpose!
by
Dearest Hollywood,
Please. Jack Handy is rolling
over in his grave
Please. Jack Handy is rolling
over in his grave
by
Superwasp is here
More than a halfwit but whole
Dog Day Afternoon
More than a halfwit but whole
Dog Day Afternoon
by
opportunity
janis, janis, yeah yeah yeah!
thanks for this cool site
janis, janis, yeah yeah yeah!
thanks for this cool site
by
And still I wonder
Why "blink" is implemented
In the new release
Why "blink" is implemented
In the new release
by