Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
27 Years, 136 Days and 76969 Haiku later...

Write some cutting verse.
Like about cutting yourself
You big old gay blade . . .
Haiku # 73864, November 23, 2021 10:24 am ET
by Zorro the GLBTQ Haiku Activist
These rotten verses
even a dog will not eat
yet you devour.
Haiku # 73863, November 23, 2021 7:57 am ET
by And ask for seconds.
May a large poodle
rape your nostrils while you sleep
in drunken slumber.

What a way to go.
Suffocated by dog spooge.
And single malt scotch.
Haiku # 73862, November 23, 2021 7:50 am ET
by Just joking. Relax. of Take a deep breath. And fart... oh, you strained too hard. Go change your pants.
Don't you get sick of
this five seven five bullshit?
It's so meaningless!
Haiku # 73861, November 23, 2021 7:42 am ET
by Cockthistle.
Had your little fun ?
Went through the whole alphabet?
Please don't start numbers...
Haiku # 73858, November 23, 2021 6:28 am ET
by Twenty-six Ways to Bore me to Death
This five seven five
shit is too arbitrary.
Fuck Basho's ash-ho.
Haiku # 73855, November 22, 2021 6:07 pm ET
by Y'know?
a b c d e
f g h i j k l
m n o p q

r s t u v
w x y and z.
now I'll start again.
Haiku # 73854, November 22, 2021 5:38 pm ET
by next time won't you sing with me?
Zebadiah zaps
zipperhead zoophilia
zigzagging zebras.
Haiku # 73853, November 22, 2021 5:35 pm ET
by Zinedine Zidane
Your yucky yarbles
yielding youthful yearnings
yellow yolk yogurt.
Haiku # 73852, November 22, 2021 5:29 pm ET
by Yolandi
Xena's XXX
xenophobic xenomorph
x-rayed Xavier.
Haiku # 73851, November 22, 2021 5:17 pm ET
by Xie Xingfang
Wascawy wabbits
wound witless white warmongers
wearing women's wigs.
Haiku # 73850, November 22, 2021 5:09 pm ET
by Wil Wheaton
Very vacuous
vaginas vacuumed vacant
via vogue valve vents.
Haiku # 73849, November 22, 2021 5:00 pm ET
by Vivienne Vavoom
Ugly underwear
undulates under udders
utterly undone.
Haiku # 73848, November 22, 2021 4:50 pm ET
by Ultimately Usain
Tiny tits torn to
ten tantalizing tidbits
terrorize Tampa.
Haiku # 73847, November 22, 2021 4:31 pm ET
by Tina Turner
Oh please, just stop. Please!
Go back to bathroom humor . . .
anything else please.
Haiku # 73846, November 22, 2021 4:05 pm ET
by No More Alphabet Games
Syllable slamming
snotty salamanders shy
Slyly sideways, Sam.
Haiku # 73845, November 22, 2021 3:58 pm ET
by Sylvester Stallone
Rancid ribbed rubbers
ruined Ruth's ravioli
retrospectively.
Haiku # 73844, November 22, 2021 3:53 pm ET
by Ryan Reynolds
Quietly question
queer queens queefing quirkily
quipping qubits.
Haiku # 73843, November 22, 2021 1:24 pm ET
by Quintillus
Niggardly nasties
nip nine nifty nipples now
nullify nothing.
Haiku # 73842, November 22, 2021 12:04 pm ET
by Nad Nostril of Noops Nedited
Pissing putrid puke,
prole puppies pound pink pussy
pomegranate pie.
Haiku # 73841, November 22, 2021 12:01 pm ET
by Prince Phillip
Oh, ostrich ova
obscure omnivorous orbs'
odd oscillation.
Haiku # 73840, November 22, 2021 11:55 am ET
by Ozzy Osbourne
Niggardly nasties
nip nine nifty nipples now
nullify nothingness.
Haiku # 73839, November 22, 2021 11:49 am ET
by Nad Nostril
Mister Megabyte
mastubates marsupials
milking mad mothers.
Haiku # 73838, November 22, 2021 11:46 am ET
by Moth Man
Your algorithm
or alliteration-bot
Is a great big bore.
Haiku # 73837, November 22, 2021 9:53 am ET
by ABCDEF yawwwnnn of Truly Bad Haiku
Lactating lamas
lick lollipops lazily
languishing lastly.
Haiku # 73836, November 22, 2021 7:58 am ET
by Lucy Liu
Karen's kangaroo
kicks koalas' kelp kababs'
kilocalories.
Haiku # 73835, November 22, 2021 7:37 am ET
by Kim Kardashian
All toilets are white.
Hey now, that's being racist!
We need black toilets.
Haiku # 73834, November 22, 2021 7:22 am ET
by Crabby-cunt Karen of Multicolored toilet movement for liberated bowel movements
Janet's enema
Was mistaken for haiku
By a white toilet
Haiku # 73833, November 21, 2021 11:25 pm ET
by Person of Color Purple
Jill joyfully jumped
Jack jamming jubilant jade
jettisoning junk.
Haiku # 73832, November 21, 2021 11:21 pm ET
by Janet Jackson
Hey! It is OK
To travel across state lines
To kill communists.
Haiku # 73831, November 21, 2021 11:20 pm ET
by Cross State Lines
That Youtube Karen is HOT !
I think I need to lather...
Or maybe lath her.
Haiku # 73830, November 21, 2021 11:15 pm ET
by Big Eyed Babe of Car Window
Calm your mother down.
That bitch owes me a haiku.
Written on her skin.
Haiku # 73829, November 21, 2021 11:12 pm ET
by Ed Gein of Quiet Farmhouse
Gentle autumn breeze.
Silk caresses my ass-cheeks...
Time to recharge phone.
Haiku # 73828, November 21, 2021 11:10 pm ET
by Sensual Cables of Plugged In (Out)
Vanishing Dog-man.
Turn my phone around, baby.
Rotten verse will live!
Haiku # 73826, November 21, 2021 11:05 pm ET
by Fermented Dog of Acquired Taste
Rotten seagull dog
Flying over this haiku.
Now prepare to breathe.
Haiku # 73825, November 21, 2021 11:01 pm ET
by Pulmonary Prophecies of Restoration
Eat my haiku. Yes.
Stuff it down your silly throat.
Then vomit it up.
Haiku # 73824, November 21, 2021 10:59 pm ET
by Unconditional Love of Your Dead Grandmother
Take your booster shot.
Take it NOW. And then again
Every seven months.
Haiku # 73823, November 21, 2021 10:56 pm ET
by This Haiku Brought to You by PFIZER of Great Reset My Ass
I love my black race.
My black people will stand strong...
Beacause we are white.
Haiku # 73822, November 21, 2021 10:53 pm ET
by Afrika, Child of Europe
Ignorant idle
imbeciles ignite insects
into innocence.
Haiku # 73821, November 21, 2021 10:16 pm ET
by Ivan Illich
A hill to die on:
Dissidents versus sheeple.
Kill me for my views
Haiku # 73820, November 21, 2021 10:13 pm ET
by I Despise You of Nothing Personal
Christmas lights on porch
Klown world quelled for the moment...
Regroup and prepare.
Haiku # 73819, November 21, 2021 10:11 pm ET
by Subvert the Collective Neurosis of Our Moment
I need tobacco.
A fine English tobacco.
Kiss my PIPE, haters.
Haiku # 73818, November 21, 2021 10:08 pm ET
by Nose Inhale of Watch the Smoke Dissipate
Let us meet right here
By the goodness of Janis
Internet hostess.
Haiku # 73817, November 21, 2021 10:04 pm ET
by Canadians good for Something
Alliteration:
Absolutely asinine
And alphabetized!
Haiku # 73816, November 21, 2021 10:01 pm ET
by At All Angles of Altitude
Horny hobbits have
huevos hanging happily
humping hags' hoses.
Haiku # 73815, November 21, 2021 7:41 pm ET
by Helen Hunt
The DELTA Variant!
Oh gosh ! The DELTA Variant.
Oh I am so SCARED. Help !!!
Haiku # 73814, November 21, 2021 7:34 pm ET
by Sign Me Up for Boosters Every 3 Days Mommy of Tony Fauci's Diseased Sociopathic Soul
Gregory gaily
gangbangs grotesque green gremlins
gargling gold grog.
Haiku # 73813, November 21, 2021 7:26 pm ET
by Gal Gadot
Fabulous faggots
freakily fornicating
fat frogs far from France.
Haiku # 73812, November 21, 2021 7:18 pm ET
by Fabio
Eat your banana.
It will make you feel better.
Your blood sugar's low.
Haiku # 73811, November 21, 2021 5:22 pm ET
by Doctor Happy
Elephants eating
eggs erase Eamon's earwigs
evenly ebbing.
Haiku # 73810, November 21, 2021 3:49 pm ET
by Elvira
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