Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
27 Years, 136 Days and 76969 Haiku later...

Mister Megabyte
mastubates marsupials
milking mad mothers.
Haiku # 73838, November 22, 2021 11:46 am ET
by Moth Man
Your algorithm
or alliteration-bot
Is a great big bore.
Haiku # 73837, November 22, 2021 9:53 am ET
by ABCDEF yawwwnnn of Truly Bad Haiku
Lactating lamas
lick lollipops lazily
languishing lastly.
Haiku # 73836, November 22, 2021 7:58 am ET
by Lucy Liu
Karen's kangaroo
kicks koalas' kelp kababs'
kilocalories.
Haiku # 73835, November 22, 2021 7:37 am ET
by Kim Kardashian
All toilets are white.
Hey now, that's being racist!
We need black toilets.
Haiku # 73834, November 22, 2021 7:22 am ET
by Crabby-cunt Karen of Multicolored toilet movement for liberated bowel movements
Janet's enema
Was mistaken for haiku
By a white toilet
Haiku # 73833, November 21, 2021 11:25 pm ET
by Person of Color Purple
Jill joyfully jumped
Jack jamming jubilant jade
jettisoning junk.
Haiku # 73832, November 21, 2021 11:21 pm ET
by Janet Jackson
Hey! It is OK
To travel across state lines
To kill communists.
Haiku # 73831, November 21, 2021 11:20 pm ET
by Cross State Lines
That Youtube Karen is HOT !
I think I need to lather...
Or maybe lath her.
Haiku # 73830, November 21, 2021 11:15 pm ET
by Big Eyed Babe of Car Window
Calm your mother down.
That bitch owes me a haiku.
Written on her skin.
Haiku # 73829, November 21, 2021 11:12 pm ET
by Ed Gein of Quiet Farmhouse
Gentle autumn breeze.
Silk caresses my ass-cheeks...
Time to recharge phone.
Haiku # 73828, November 21, 2021 11:10 pm ET
by Sensual Cables of Plugged In (Out)
Vanishing Dog-man.
Turn my phone around, baby.
Rotten verse will live!
Haiku # 73826, November 21, 2021 11:05 pm ET
by Fermented Dog of Acquired Taste
Rotten seagull dog
Flying over this haiku.
Now prepare to breathe.
Haiku # 73825, November 21, 2021 11:01 pm ET
by Pulmonary Prophecies of Restoration
Eat my haiku. Yes.
Stuff it down your silly throat.
Then vomit it up.
Haiku # 73824, November 21, 2021 10:59 pm ET
by Unconditional Love of Your Dead Grandmother
Take your booster shot.
Take it NOW. And then again
Every seven months.
Haiku # 73823, November 21, 2021 10:56 pm ET
by This Haiku Brought to You by PFIZER of Great Reset My Ass
I love my black race.
My black people will stand strong...
Beacause we are white.
Haiku # 73822, November 21, 2021 10:53 pm ET
by Afrika, Child of Europe
Ignorant idle
imbeciles ignite insects
into innocence.
Haiku # 73821, November 21, 2021 10:16 pm ET
by Ivan Illich
A hill to die on:
Dissidents versus sheeple.
Kill me for my views
Haiku # 73820, November 21, 2021 10:13 pm ET
by I Despise You of Nothing Personal
Christmas lights on porch
Klown world quelled for the moment...
Regroup and prepare.
Haiku # 73819, November 21, 2021 10:11 pm ET
by Subvert the Collective Neurosis of Our Moment
I need tobacco.
A fine English tobacco.
Kiss my PIPE, haters.
Haiku # 73818, November 21, 2021 10:08 pm ET
by Nose Inhale of Watch the Smoke Dissipate
Let us meet right here
By the goodness of Janis
Internet hostess.
Haiku # 73817, November 21, 2021 10:04 pm ET
by Canadians good for Something
Alliteration:
Absolutely asinine
And alphabetized!
Haiku # 73816, November 21, 2021 10:01 pm ET
by At All Angles of Altitude
Horny hobbits have
huevos hanging happily
humping hags' hoses.
Haiku # 73815, November 21, 2021 7:41 pm ET
by Helen Hunt
The DELTA Variant!
Oh gosh ! The DELTA Variant.
Oh I am so SCARED. Help !!!
Haiku # 73814, November 21, 2021 7:34 pm ET
by Sign Me Up for Boosters Every 3 Days Mommy of Tony Fauci's Diseased Sociopathic Soul
Gregory gaily
gangbangs grotesque green gremlins
gargling gold grog.
Haiku # 73813, November 21, 2021 7:26 pm ET
by Gal Gadot
Fabulous faggots
freakily fornicating
fat frogs far from France.
Haiku # 73812, November 21, 2021 7:18 pm ET
by Fabio
Eat your banana.
It will make you feel better.
Your blood sugar's low.
Haiku # 73811, November 21, 2021 5:22 pm ET
by Doctor Happy
Elephants eating
eggs erase Eamon's earwigs
evenly ebbing.
Haiku # 73810, November 21, 2021 3:49 pm ET
by Elvira
fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck
fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck
fuck fuck fuck facebook
Haiku # 73809, November 21, 2021 3:40 pm ET
by scotch
educated eels
electrically energized
emerge everywhere
Haiku # 73808, November 21, 2021 3:37 pm ET
by scotch of Damit
don’t do damn donuts
dangerous doofus drivers
dipshit dickhead dolts
Haiku # 73807, November 21, 2021 3:34 pm ET
by scotch of Not on my lawn!
Dangerous dingos
don't dig dirt diligently
downward, Damien.
Haiku # 73806, November 21, 2021 3:34 pm ET
by Digong Duterte
Cole's cantankerous
cat can't contemplate Cory's
casserole clutter.
Haiku # 73805, November 21, 2021 11:58 am ET
by Charlie Chaplin
Blowing bodacious
boogers banefully backwards
beats buggering bums.
Haiku # 73804, November 21, 2021 11:50 am ET
by Beethoven
Allison's aardvark
asks about apples and ass
all around Austin.
Haiku # 73803, November 21, 2021 11:48 am ET
by Ansel Adams
Our homes are prisons.
Locked in by Fear and Loathing,
FaceBook and TikTok.
Haiku # 73802, November 21, 2021 11:06 am ET
by Get out while you can! of Escape to Fiji.
I know what's to come.
Doom and gloom for everyone.
Like evil Oprah.
Haiku # 73801, November 21, 2021 11:02 am ET
by You get a disease and you get a disease and everyone gets a disease! of Or starvation, or prison/concentration camps. Whatever.
i have my worries
then i have my cares but then
what is yet to come?
Haiku # 73800, November 21, 2021 10:20 am ET
by vhs
I don't care about
the earth's magnetic field
and neither should you.
Haiku # 73799, November 21, 2021 7:48 am ET
by
Turn your phone sideways.
And then turn it right side up.
Rotten verse dog man!
Haiku # 73798, November 21, 2021 7:10 am ET
by He'll bash you!
Dark meat and gravy.
Corn, candied yams, and stuffing.
And then there's football.
Haiku # 73797, November 21, 2021 7:01 am ET
by Dear Lord, we thank thee for protecting us from covid, terrorists, and of course the evil Mark Zuckerberg. May you forever keep him and his platforms off our devices. Amen.
I cannot keep up.
Medicinal heroin.
Order it online.

It's the world today.
Needles are a tax write off.
My accountant said.
Haiku # 73796, November 20, 2021 10:22 pm ET
by Come on, Biden, push the button.
Wimmins in Japan
be imported from Russia.
Saw it on TV.
Haiku # 73795, November 20, 2021 7:56 pm ET
by Yep.
Wimmin are funny.
Do they have them in Japan?
Maybe a phone app...
Haiku # 73794, November 20, 2021 7:30 pm ET
by Virtual Feminine of Smartphone
Ice Age number five:
I really tried to watch it.
But it revulsed me.
Haiku # 73793, November 20, 2021 7:26 pm ET
by Mass-produced Neurosis of AMURIKKKKA
Have you given up?
You already have enough?
Your game's obvious.
Haiku # 73792, November 20, 2021 7:08 pm ET
by
Quantum mechanics
don't work on broken down cars
nor do they drink beer.
Haiku # 73791, November 20, 2021 5:00 pm ET
by They earn slightly above minimum wage. of But no one knows what work they actually do.
Aardvarks are funny.
Do they have them in Japan?
I do not think so.
Haiku # 73790, November 20, 2021 4:56 pm ET
by Chocolate fondu. of It's fun to do.
Beet borscht bastard brew
bubbling banefully by
blasting blueberries.
Haiku # 73789, November 20, 2021 4:49 pm ET
by Beethoven
Probably sewage,
parasites, hazardous waste,
and thought suppressants.
Haiku # 73787, November 20, 2021 1:06 pm ET
by If you saw it, you'd understand. of only the rich can afford clean water. Sad, really.
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