Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
25 Years, 194 Days and 75677 Haiku later...

Why didn't Jesus
walk on a bunch of hot coals?
That would be something.
Haiku # 73944, November 27, 2021 1:04 am ET
by BBQ of Sandals
I'll never forget
waking up Christmas morning
and finding him there
all covered with soot
I think he pissed himself, too.
Jesus in fireplace.
Haiku # 73943, November 27, 2021 1:00 am ET
by Finder of singed sandal
It isn't murder.
Zuckerberg isn't human.
Zombie cyborg creep.
Haiku # 73941, November 26, 2021 9:04 pm ET
by Join DTZ party.
Zuckerberg should die.
Who needs your damn articles.
Poison, guns, and bombs.
Haiku # 73940, November 26, 2021 9:00 pm ET
by DTZ of Mark Zuckerberg lives at 1456 Edgewood Drive, Palo Alto, California 94301.
I can suggest to visit to you a site on which there are many articles on this question.
Haiku # 73939, November 26, 2021 5:11 pm ET
by MatthewPem of Ethiopia
Fusion energy
is not going to save us.
Neither will haiku.

Kill someone you hate.
Let your hatred free your soul.
And then go fishing.
Haiku # 73938, November 26, 2021 3:48 pm ET
by DTZ of As long as it's not virtual.
Pumpkin spice latte.
Pineapple on pizza's gay.
And then there's Facebook.

It cannot get worse.
And then *poof!* there's metaverse.
Zuckerberg's evil.
Haiku # 73937, November 26, 2021 3:33 pm ET
by DTZ
Inedible verse
in the metaverse is worse.
Rehearse in your hearse.

You know what you need?
Funeral limo handjob.
Brings you back to life.
Haiku # 73936, November 26, 2021 2:49 pm ET
by Death to Zuckerberg of DTZ
Gosh it's so BRILLIANT!
What you just wrote. Sheer brilliance...
So what's for dinner?
Haiku # 73935, November 26, 2021 1:54 pm ET
by Line of Lines of Hoboken
lisa! you are tearing
me apart! i did not hit
her...its bullshit,no...

i....did...NAWT, oh hi
mark, how is your sex life...um
where is the guy from?
Haiku # 73934, November 26, 2021 1:52 pm ET
by vhs of checking The Room
Inedible verse
dogs sniff and leave uneaten
They call it haiku

Indelible ink
shoots from an octopus dink
Ocean autograph
Haiku # 73933, November 26, 2021 1:22 pm ET
by Ink of Dink
Thanksgiving thunder!

Giblet fire from down under!

(Toilet gobbling sounds)
Haiku # 73932, November 26, 2021 12:46 pm ET
by LaTrina Fuller of Flushing, NY
Artemis was weird
Hated violence but she was
Fine with killing kids
Haiku # 73931, November 26, 2021 11:42 am ET
by cursedmints
cars 2 is the best
mater kills bad car nazis
finn is really hot
Haiku # 73930, November 26, 2021 11:36 am ET
by cursedmints
On the thirteenth day
of Christmas my true love died.
Darth wanted the corpse...
Haiku # 73929, November 26, 2021 10:35 am ET
by Not Sure For What of Said It Was "An Experiment"
In the Philippines
Christmas season lasts five months.
I haven't gone postal.

Yet.
Haiku # 73928, November 26, 2021 9:13 am ET
by Xmas stockings full of dried fish and balot.
God I hate Christmas.
The man who invented it
should be crucified.
Haiku # 73927, November 26, 2021 9:07 am ET
by Right?
Oh shit. Christmas songs.
Words cannot express how I
Soooo hate Christmas songs!
Haiku # 73926, November 26, 2021 9:06 am ET
by dw
Change "Black Friday" to
"African American
post Thanksgiving Day".
Haiku # 73925, November 26, 2021 9:03 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
We are just cattle.
In one hole, out the other.
Consume, rinse, repeat.
Haiku # 73924, November 26, 2021 8:55 am ET
by Grumpy Old Figpucker
Will the Turdmaster
then ask to add corn to your
Door Dash shopping cart?
Haiku # 73923, November 26, 2021 8:50 am ET
by Next it will chew the food for you.
all right all right i
knew you were into leather
but this is too much
Haiku # 73922, November 26, 2021 7:45 am ET
by vhs of king james would ratio you
i think i will just
cum on the Bible and quit
reading books on line
Haiku # 73921, November 26, 2021 6:40 am ET
by me so funny of me tell joke #1
my new invention
Turdmaster Talking Toilet
"I see you ate corn!"
Haiku # 73920, November 26, 2021 4:37 am ET
by Bathrooms of the Future
You people need help.
Can't you just tell some fart jokes?
Here, pull my finger.
Haiku # 73919, November 26, 2021 4:15 am ET
by Darth Whorendous
i think im just going
to read the Bible and quit
coming on line
Haiku # 73918, November 25, 2021 11:04 pm ET
by vhs
Just one more please, mom:
With, um, more cranberry sauce,
and some more haiku.
Haiku # 73917, November 25, 2021 10:52 pm ET
by Get Stuffed Chief Massasoit of Massachusetts
I eat rotten verse.
Got problem with that, old man?
Fucking commies. Damn...
Haiku # 73916, November 25, 2021 10:45 pm ET
by Generalisimo Franthisco Franco of St. Theresa's Arm
That was not turkey.
That was your mother, served hot.
I stuffed her real good.
Haiku # 73915, November 25, 2021 10:41 pm ET
by Pasha Mehmet Gobblioglu of Old Istanbul, New Jersey
I cant stop. Oh God...
I can't stop writing pure gold.
It hurts to be me.
Haiku # 73914, November 25, 2021 10:32 pm ET
by This Pathetic World Will Soon Recognize My Brilliance in spite of My Exalted Humility
The cold turkey cure:
You try to kick it. You try...
then you make sandwich.
Haiku # 73913, November 25, 2021 10:28 pm ET
by On Whole Wheat Toast with lots of Mayo of Ouagadouggou, Upper Volta
Oh, you can't relate?
Oh, you do not eat turkey?
Get with the program!
Haiku # 73912, November 25, 2021 10:25 pm ET
by We Are Esspik Eenglis Here Senyor of Oaxaca, Rhode Island
Just do more shopping!
Go buy lots more stuff online.
Spend and heal the world!
Haiku # 73911, November 25, 2021 10:22 pm ET
by World Peace Through Frenzy of Shopping in a Stupor
Black Friday: rayciss.
It should be called "White Friday"
to halt injustice.
Haiku # 73910, November 25, 2021 10:18 pm ET
by So Shut Up and Buy on 26th of November for Racial Reconciliation
China may attack
While we sleeping off turkey.
Wake up! Go shopping!
Haiku # 73909, November 25, 2021 10:14 pm ET
by Xi Pinjing of C.C.P.
Butt potter in my gravy...
And then I eat pie-kin pump.
Medicinal WHAT?
Haiku # 73908, November 25, 2021 10:08 pm ET
by Pump up the Jam of Rasberry
South Park? Oh forsooth.
Sir, must you be so vulgar?
Haiku is high art.
Haiku # 73907, November 25, 2021 10:05 pm ET
by Lofty Heights of Fart Jokes
Okay, let me guess.
Pot butter in your gravy.
And your pumpkin pie.
Haiku # 73906, November 25, 2021 10:01 pm ET
by Medicinal, right? of I didn't inhale.
My muse talk turkey.
Then she serve me apple pie.
My muse get me high.
Haiku # 73905, November 25, 2021 9:59 pm ET
by Incorrect Third-person Cojugations of My Whoop-ass Muse
The new South Park rocked.
And you won't guess what happened!
That kid Kenny died.
Haiku # 73904, November 25, 2021 9:59 pm ET
by You should watch it.
Thanksgiving's OK...
But bad haiku is the BOMB.
It blew up my muse.
Haiku # 73903, November 25, 2021 9:56 pm ET
by She Was Inflatable, thus sort of Relatable
What up VHS
I am in Moxieland now...
The way life should be.
Haiku # 73902, November 25, 2021 9:53 pm ET
by Ayuh Wicked Good of Finestkind
Darth ate balot egg
Stuffed with live turkey and drugs.
Tryptophan deluxe.
Haiku # 73901, November 25, 2021 9:51 pm ET
by Plimoth Pharmacy of 1620
Happy thanksgiving
To elect haiku remnant.
"I am the turkey".
Haiku # 73900, November 25, 2021 9:48 pm ET
by Dig My Wattles of Shimmy Shimmy Shake and make a sandwich next day
Call me Robot Frost
Stopping to crap in your forest
My horse think's you're queer
Haiku # 73899, November 25, 2021 9:19 pm ET
by Deepdank Woods of Rural Porn Star
It's snowing cocaine
Look how productive I am.
Poetry Robot
Haiku # 73898, November 25, 2021 9:15 pm ET
by Clunk of Junk

who gets the gizzard?
settle this once and for all
who gets the wishbone?
Haiku # 73897, November 25, 2021 9:12 pm ET
by Cassowary not of Casseroles
China will kill us.
China will kill the planet
for communism.
Haiku # 73896, November 25, 2021 7:23 pm ET
by More greedy than capitalists.
cup of coffee 7
pm, snow already? well
here we go again...
Haiku # 73895, November 25, 2021 6:45 pm ET
by vhs of and so it goes.
Devil Artemis
turned Perfect Cell into an
antihero with Kermit

yes, that frog.
Haiku # 73894, November 25, 2021 6:16 pm ET
by vhs
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