Trouble in badlands I evil! Go kill! Unga Splat landscape. Hungry?

Bitch gave me an itch
Bought a motherfucking gun
Bitch is gonna die

I got me a whore
Threw her up against the door
Pimpin' ain't easy

Got a gun in hand
Motherfucking killing spree
Dare to come by me

This R2 has a
bad motivator unit.
I want my sun deck!

make sure that you leave
those br tags after each
line of your Haiku

the pond is rippled
by the splash of his landing:
a naked fat guy.

that dave guy is not
writing haiku. luckily
i have a pistol.

wonderful pig
beckoning sweetly in the sun
rooting anyone?

They print anything.
Even the crap that I write.
How stupid are they?

The frog will not splish
Til the Holy Toad of Death
thinks it's time to croak.

So dumb the haiku
Ha, never to be finished
If you can't start it

See other email

Your web site is slow
Two hundred bytes per second
I'm signing off now.

McDonald's breakfast
Egg McMuffin and coffee
With a hangover.

of dumps & craps
you shouldn't hate shit
even if it clogs the john
even if it stinks

Whispering secrets,
Miraculous happiness,
Swinging upside down

Falling ceiling fan
Homocidal death dervish
Dear God, find my ear!

as the finest ale
with a full foam head, and now. . .
and now i flush

WHY ARE ALL MEN WHOSE
NAMES BEGIN WITH THE LETTER
"J" SO VERY MEAN?

Hum little box
Walls are too white
Paste in my mouth

Coffee is my friend
Latte, cappuccino good
Homer: "Jaaaaavvvaaaaa.....hmmmmmmmmmm"

Jan, here's my request
To preview my new Haiku
'FORE it gets submit.
See why?

I would like to know
Who is this Dryden fellow
And why hassle Jan?

Happy squirrels scamper
Stealing my birdseed again.
Rodent dinner soon.

For Janis
There once was a girl named Janis
Who forgot her friends, the asses
Who is complete without little shits anyway
BOX!
Gary "the great" Holmes

Gary Rules
Is this where I leave a message?

Janis, you bring joy.
Haiku is meant to make us
all laugh till it hurts
But do you not think
you should delete some Haiku's
especially smut?
A haiku is meant
to be but seventeen beats
and to make us thinks
Course, I could be wro

If you're not going
to sack it, go home and whack
it. WRAP YOUR WHACKER!!!

Rendering sucks so
on a 486 tis true
Need more RAM and Cokes

Humpy has a problem,
His haiku Really SUCKS ASS!
,
He can't count to five.

Hoe-ass bitch better
Recognize, motherfucker, Or hoe-ass gon' die!

You bastard cat, get
Off the goddamn counter or
I'll freeze you solid!!

Amish bastards love
You, so the least you could do
Is leave them alone.

Death mail to chickens
Isn't as safe as it seems
Some have machine guns.

last night I was bored
So I gave my cat a bath.

Still fur on my tongue.

Volleyball in pool,
if ball bounces in, it's fair.
Jan's team always wins.

Little Billy Goat
Soft grey fur and sideways eyes
I shoot up your ass

At the urinal
I piss as hard as I can
Cant break cigarette
EAT MY ASS !
Eric Marcus

I have a big dog
His name is "Go fuck yourself"
My mom hates that name.

thought it was a fart
put my hand down my underwear
it was a wet mess

bird flys in the wind
i see it over my head
it shits on my cheek

Come here little sheep
Your fur is so soft and white
Do you have VD?

I kick the midget
I laugh at his tiny dick
I think I smell cheese

i want to lick you
And feel you get really hard
And become insane

i love to kiss you
i suck your passionate lips
harder and harder

Cold beverage in hand
Floating in warm gentle waves
I found paradise

The homeless woman
Has no pants and smells like poo
I spit on her face!!

I am so happy
I never knew of true love
Until I met you

i dreamt of your lips
i gaze into your dark eyes
i miss you a lot